Twins lost at 19 weeks...

loopie · Post by **loopie** » Thu Sep 04, 2008 1:53 pm

Dear Baylorbear,

I am so very sorry for your loss- how devastating. We are thinking of you at this time and send thoughts of healing and hope out to you and your family.

take care.

loopie

joyanna · Post by **joyanna** » Thu Sep 04, 2008 5:01 pm

Baylorbear - I cannot imagine the grief that you and your dh must be feeling. You are in my prayers and I pray to God that he will give you some strength and comfort during this very difficult time.

wishfull27 · Post by **wishfull27** » Thu Sep 04, 2008 5:12 pm

sending you and Dh loads of love and hugs at this difficult time xx

baylorbear33 · Post by **baylorbear33** » Thu Sep 04, 2008 7:17 pm

Thank you all for your support and kind words. We are doing a little better each day... I've only cried 4 times today so far, which is an improvement from the days before. We got the news today that the babies did not have any chromosomal abnormalities based on the amnioscentesis, so this news is a mixed-bag for me. On one hand, this makes me happy as we should hopefully be able to have a healthy baby in the future. On the other hand, it is just one more thing for me to not understand. If we had no abnormalities, then why did this happen? And even worse, did the amnio cause this to happen? I don't know if many of you know this, but I was actually carrying triplets. We had a non-viable fetus from the start and the doctors just assumed it would absorb, mis-carry, etc. but this never happened. It appears that this 3rd fetus is actually most likely the cause of our situation. We had just been diagnosed with triplet-to-triplet-to-triplet transfusion syndrome, which is extremely rare. We had an appointment scheduled with another specialist, but we lost all the babies before we could get in to see him. Again, I'm sorry for the rambling, just trying to get through my days. Thank you again to each of you, and I would love to hear from anyone who has experienced something similar.

whynotus · Post by **whynotus** » Fri Sep 05, 2008 11:47 am

Baylor bear - I am so, so sorry. I know that every day you carry a child your love for them grows bigger - so I can't even imagine what a loss as late as this is like. I have often thought of those that graduated from our ivf study and hoped all was well, and something made me think to check on any progress reports, so I was so upset to see your post. You are in my thoughts - I only wish I could make you feel a little bit better. (((((hugs)))))
-Lara

IndieBlue · Post by **IndieBlue** » Wed Sep 10, 2008 8:38 pm

I am so sorry Baylor to sign on and see your post

I can not imagine the pain you must be feeling right now....praying for you and your husband!

smiles2IVF · Post by **smiles2IVF** » Wed Sep 10, 2008 9:30 pm

sorry for your lost

washingtonda · Post by **washingtonda** » Fri Sep 12, 2008 1:47 am

Baylorbear - My prayers go out to you, DH and those precious little girls who are now the angels wo will continue to keep you. I know words could never express what you must be going through but never give up hope. God have a plan for all of us who are going through this journey. Never question why....just continue to beleive and you will soon get the happiness you seek.

Take each day one day at a time and grieve and cry as much as you need too. Tears heal the sole and know that it's okay to cry. Know that you will soon be blessed. God has a way of taking care of all his children. You, DH and those babies are parts of that.

Don't ever give up on your dreams. Promise they will come true.

Mine was a long time coming in many different ways but I have overcome and I know you will to.

Much luv and comfort to you and your family.

Hope644 · Post by **Hope644** » Fri Sep 12, 2008 2:33 am

My prayers go out to you, dear one. I wish we could all understand why these things happen, though I don't know that we can or that it would necessarily be enough to help... the pain still remains. May God grant you the strength, comfort, and support that you require during this amazingly difficult time. I pray that you will lean on Him and that His unfailing love will bring you hope and peace.

Ghost · Post by **Ghost** » Fri Sep 12, 2008 3:11 am

baylorbear33 wrote:Thank you all for your support and kind words. We are doing a little better each day... I've only cried 4 times today so far, which is an improvement from the days before. We got the news today that the babies did not have any chromosomal abnormalities based on the amnioscentesis, so this news is a mixed-bag for me. On one hand, this makes me happy as we should hopefully be able to have a healthy baby in the future. On the other hand, it is just one more thing for me to not understand. If we had no abnormalities, then why did this happen? And even worse, did the amnio cause this to happen? I don't know if many of you know this, but I was actually carrying triplets. We had a non-viable fetus from the start and the doctors just assumed it would absorb, mis-carry, etc. but this never happened. It appears that this 3rd fetus is actually most likely the cause of our situation. We had just been diagnosed with triplet-to-triplet-to-triplet transfusion syndrome, which is extremely rare. We had an appointment scheduled with another specialist, but we lost all the babies before we could get in to see him. Again, I'm sorry for the rambling, just trying to get through my days. Thank you again to each of you, and I would love to hear from anyone who has experienced something similar.

Sounds like good embryos, flawed implantation.

Towachi · Post by **Towachi** » Fri Sep 12, 2008 1:57 pm

My dear sister, just like everyone here have said to you, be thou not dismayed, for the Lord your God, he will help you and strengthen you through all this. Remember his word in Exodus 23:26 "There shall be no one miscarring or barren in your land; I will fulfil the number of your days." The miscarriage is not of God, it is the work of devil. So be prayerful and trust in the Lord always, he will make your ways prosperous. Read Psalms 127:3, Isaiah 66:9. I am praying for you even as I go through this IVF process, I am standing in the gap for all of us that God will intervene in our situations. We are his children and he will wipe away our tears. Listen closely to his voice, he will bring you a word to console you and your DH.

Towachi

mally · Post by **mally** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 2:00 pm

You are in our thoughts and prayers,the Good Lord, will not let you down, stay strong, he will defintely give them back to you, at the right time.

keep up the faith.

Mally

Babyb · Post by **Babyb** » Fri Sep 19, 2008 6:06 am

I haven't been on the board in so long as I have been taking care of newborn twins. My boys came 2 years after experiencing the loss of my daughter (she died at 13 weeks of life due to a very rare genetic disorder). I remember the utter devastation and pain all too vividly and my heart goes out to those who have experienced similar losses (m/c or otherwise). I am so deeply saddened by your news and can only say that I do sincerely hope there is a God out there who has a much happier plan for you. I must confess that I questioned God quite a bit when I witnessed my daughter die a gruesome death. In fact, she was hit with not one, but 2 very rare conditions. The first had her at about a 50% survival rate (and she beat the odds), but the 2nd which surfaced only 7 weeks after recovering from the first, has a 100% fatality rate. I don't mean to babble on or distract from your loss. I just wanted to let you know my thoughts are with you.

At times like these, many feel they can't go on (especially after the stress of IVF). Everyone grieves differently, but for what it is worth, what helped us was our mission to rebuild the family at whatever cost. Our daughter was our first and we were determined she would not be our last. Some criticized us for trying too soon after her death, but for us, it was the only thing that brought light/hope back into our lives. I think deep down inside, I secretly hoped she would return in a healthy body (perhaps she has, perhaps she is watching over her brothers). I hope this tragedy won't discourage future tries. No one will ever replace my dear daughter, and I will think of her daily for the rest of my life. But looking into the eyes of her brothers . . . well, it just makes me appreciate her and the miracle of life that much more.

Bless you and your family.

carisa · Post by **carisa** » Fri Sep 19, 2008 3:32 pm

Im so sorry you have gone through this. I never understand why these horrible things happen to such good people. After all that we have gone though with infertility treatment, I just can't imagine. You will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers. Again, I'm so sorry.......

Twins lost at 19 weeks...

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