Hi girls,
Got a bit of a dilema and hoping for some advice.
Just found out i've got a job interview later this week, it's only a part time position in a clothes shop, but it's my first interview after being off work sick for 3 years.
Anyways, i was just wondering, should i say anything to the manager at the interview that our treatment could be starting any time soon and that when appointments come up they'd have to be flexible with the hours i work or should i just not say anything?
Believe it or not but i'm actually more nervous about this interview than getting married next month or treatment starting, lol.
Any advice would be much appreciated.
Take care, lotsa love
Michelle
should i say anything or not?
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michelle_in_scotland
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- Location: Dumfriesshire, Scotland
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Hi Michelle
I can understand your predicament. I went for a job knowing my treatment was imminent and I have to say I was honest and told them about my treatment and that I would need time off etc. They were really understanding and supportive. Infact I never went back when I got PG as I was so sick and then losing the baby.
It is a difficult one eapecially if no one knows but I believe honesty is the best policy.
Good luck whatever you choose to do. I am sure it will be the right decision whatever you decide to do.
Love Dagny xkx
I can understand your predicament. I went for a job knowing my treatment was imminent and I have to say I was honest and told them about my treatment and that I would need time off etc. They were really understanding and supportive. Infact I never went back when I got PG as I was so sick and then losing the baby.
It is a difficult one eapecially if no one knows but I believe honesty is the best policy.
Good luck whatever you choose to do. I am sure it will be the right decision whatever you decide to do.
Love Dagny xkx
Me 38 DH 40
1st 2nd & 4th IVF/ICSI -ve
3rd +ve DD Katelyn born @ 24wks & sadly died
5th +ve m/c 9wks
6th +ve Twins Sadly DD Leah stillborn @20wks and DS Kieran born @22wks but sadly died too
7th +ve - DD Chloë Mae born @38wks our precious miracle
1st 2nd & 4th IVF/ICSI -ve
3rd +ve DD Katelyn born @ 24wks & sadly died
5th +ve m/c 9wks
6th +ve Twins Sadly DD Leah stillborn @20wks and DS Kieran born @22wks but sadly died too
7th +ve - DD Chloë Mae born @38wks our precious miracle
yes or no
Its a hard call, \i was off sick for 3 months then decided to leave my very stressful job once i did I decided it was time to go ahead with the IVF as \I am now self yOu have got to think what would stress you out more getting the job and stressing about the IVF or telling them with the chance that they might not take you on in the first place|??then agin they might be understanding |I was reading about some companys that have IVF leave which I think is wonderful.
Anyway go with your instinct on this one.
Bro
Anyway go with your instinct on this one.
Bro
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Guest
Hi Michelle
I have been stressing about this one myself........
I am currently studying after giving up a highly stressful job. So I decided to look for part time work and, after much deliberation decided that honesty was the best policy and went to work in a local botique 2 days per week on the understanding that I needed flexibility for treatments.
I consequently found that working in a small shop is different to office and other types of work in that if you go off, they really have noone to cover for you and despite 2 days, my scans did not always fall on the days I was off............anyway I phoned today to say I was off tomorrow for another scan............guess what, I was bloody well FIRED!! Can you believe it, she even tried telling me that I didn't tell her about all the hospital appointment.........what a tit!
As it just happens I had an interview last week for a job 2 days/week in IT sales which I have done in the past......so I was going to resign anyway!!!
Moral of the story, it is definately best to be up front that way you have one less worry on your shoulders!
Hope I have helped a bit
JenF
I have been stressing about this one myself........
I am currently studying after giving up a highly stressful job. So I decided to look for part time work and, after much deliberation decided that honesty was the best policy and went to work in a local botique 2 days per week on the understanding that I needed flexibility for treatments.
I consequently found that working in a small shop is different to office and other types of work in that if you go off, they really have noone to cover for you and despite 2 days, my scans did not always fall on the days I was off............anyway I phoned today to say I was off tomorrow for another scan............guess what, I was bloody well FIRED!! Can you believe it, she even tried telling me that I didn't tell her about all the hospital appointment.........what a tit!
As it just happens I had an interview last week for a job 2 days/week in IT sales which I have done in the past......so I was going to resign anyway!!!
Moral of the story, it is definately best to be up front that way you have one less worry on your shoulders!
Hope I have helped a bit
JenF
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michelle_in_scotland
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- Location: Dumfriesshire, Scotland
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Thanx for your replies. This has been playing on my mind a bit since finding out i have the interview, but as Dagny says ... honesty is the best policy.
So i think i will tell them, we have been open and honest with everyone about our upcoming treatment anyways, so now that i have had your advice i don't see why this should be any different, there's no guarentee i'll get the job, but at least they will know before hand.
Jen, that is really bad them firing you just because you have clinic appointments. I've worked in shops since leaving school, was assisstant manager in my last job until i became ill, so i know all about how it works, the manager i worked under was a bit of a b*tch, she even expected one woman to return to work straight after her mother's funeral because we were "short staffed".
Thanx again for all your replies, the interview is tomorrow morning so i'll let you know how i get on.
Take care and lotsa love
Michelle
So i think i will tell them, we have been open and honest with everyone about our upcoming treatment anyways, so now that i have had your advice i don't see why this should be any different, there's no guarentee i'll get the job, but at least they will know before hand.
Jen, that is really bad them firing you just because you have clinic appointments. I've worked in shops since leaving school, was assisstant manager in my last job until i became ill, so i know all about how it works, the manager i worked under was a bit of a b*tch, she even expected one woman to return to work straight after her mother's funeral because we were "short staffed".
Thanx again for all your replies, the interview is tomorrow morning so i'll let you know how i get on.
Take care and lotsa love
Michelle
Hi Michelle
GOOD LUCK for tomorrow.
I hope the manager is understanding and sympathetic. If not, you have my permission to stick two fingers up and tell them where they can stick their job
Jen - I am shocked that you got fired over having an appointment It's bloody outrageous. Some people are such idiots. If you know where she parks her car go and let her tyres down 
I am sooooo naughty
Love Dagny xkx
GOOD LUCK for tomorrow.
I hope the manager is understanding and sympathetic. If not, you have my permission to stick two fingers up and tell them where they can stick their job
Jen - I am shocked that you got fired over having an appointment
It's bloody outrageous. Some people are such idiots. If you know where she parks her car go and let her tyres down I am sooooo naughty
Love Dagny xkx
Me 38 DH 40
1st 2nd & 4th IVF/ICSI -ve
3rd +ve DD Katelyn born @ 24wks & sadly died
5th +ve m/c 9wks
6th +ve Twins Sadly DD Leah stillborn @20wks and DS Kieran born @22wks but sadly died too
7th +ve - DD Chloë Mae born @38wks our precious miracle
1st 2nd & 4th IVF/ICSI -ve
3rd +ve DD Katelyn born @ 24wks & sadly died
5th +ve m/c 9wks
6th +ve Twins Sadly DD Leah stillborn @20wks and DS Kieran born @22wks but sadly died too
7th +ve - DD Chloë Mae born @38wks our precious miracle
just wondering
just wondering if you have had your interview yet or not??? keep us informed.
Bronagh
Bronagh
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michelle_in_scotland
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- Location: Dumfriesshire, Scotland
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Hiya girls,
I think the interview went ok, some of the things the manager said made it sound promising, she said going by my past experience she wouldn't insult my intelligence by going over all the ins and outs of what the job entails, unlike just about every other person she's interviewed.
If i've got the job i'll get a phone call sometime tomorrow.
I did say to her that we are waiting for treatment to start any time now, she said as long as i tell her about appointments she'd work the schedule round them, she said in situations like this you have to be compassionate with the staff and that appointments won't be a problem at all.
I really do feel much better now having told her, at least she knows my situation before deciding to take me on.
Thanx for wishing me all the best, just keeping my fingers crossed i get a phone call tomorrow.
Take care and lotsa love
Michelle
xxx
I think the interview went ok, some of the things the manager said made it sound promising, she said going by my past experience she wouldn't insult my intelligence by going over all the ins and outs of what the job entails, unlike just about every other person she's interviewed.
If i've got the job i'll get a phone call sometime tomorrow.
I did say to her that we are waiting for treatment to start any time now, she said as long as i tell her about appointments she'd work the schedule round them, she said in situations like this you have to be compassionate with the staff and that appointments won't be a problem at all.
I really do feel much better now having told her, at least she knows my situation before deciding to take me on.
Thanx for wishing me all the best, just keeping my fingers crossed i get a phone call tomorrow.
Take care and lotsa love
Michelle
xxx
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KarenSmiff
- Regular
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- Joined: Thu Oct 31, 2002 3:21 pm
- Location: Central England
Hiya
Just wanted to say I had exactly the same predicament last year, I started and new job Jan 2003, knowing I was going to be started IVF Feb/March, So I didnt say anthing at the interview, and mentioned it to my lady boss a few weeks later. I felt really really guilty as they had had about 20 applicants for the job, but my boss was lovely (as she couldnt have children in her younger years). It was the best option for me. Especially, as 3 attempts later I am now 6 weeks 6 days pregnant!
Good Luck XX
Honesty does pay. (they say you have to have a good memory to lie, and thats one thing I aint got!!)
Love Karenx
Just wanted to say I had exactly the same predicament last year, I started and new job Jan 2003, knowing I was going to be started IVF Feb/March, So I didnt say anthing at the interview, and mentioned it to my lady boss a few weeks later. I felt really really guilty as they had had about 20 applicants for the job, but my boss was lovely (as she couldnt have children in her younger years). It was the best option for me. Especially, as 3 attempts later I am now 6 weeks 6 days pregnant!
Good Luck XX
Honesty does pay. (they say you have to have a good memory to lie, and thats one thing I aint got!!)
Love Karenx
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michelle_in_scotland
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- Location: Dumfriesshire, Scotland
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Hi Michelle
I also started a new job in July last year (after 15 years in the old one)! and told my boss at the interview that I was planning on starting ivf in the new year. He was great and offered me the job together with all the support I needed. We did our tmt and it worked 1st time and I'm now 14wks and 4 days pg. I really think knowing I'd been upfront at the beginning and sharing the tmt with my new colleagues made me more relaxed and therefore helped with the end result.
I really hope you get the job and wish you all the luck when you start your tmt.
Dawn
xxx
I also started a new job in July last year (after 15 years in the old one)! and told my boss at the interview that I was planning on starting ivf in the new year. He was great and offered me the job together with all the support I needed. We did our tmt and it worked 1st time and I'm now 14wks and 4 days pg. I really think knowing I'd been upfront at the beginning and sharing the tmt with my new colleagues made me more relaxed and therefore helped with the end result.
I really hope you get the job and wish you all the luck when you start your tmt.
Dawn
xxx
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michelle_in_scotland
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- Location: Dumfriesshire, Scotland
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Hi, just thought i'd let you know that all the stressing i was doing about whether or not to mention upcoming treatment at the interview was a waste of time and energy. I didn't get any phone call yesterday, so i obviously didn't get the job, as my fella says, they don't know what they're missing and it's their loss. Nevermind, i've got an application for a new shop opening in town so i'll hand that in on Monday. I'm actually not that bothered about not getting the job, it's a shop i never go in anyways, a bit too snotty for a commoner like me, lol.
My fella was really sweet about it though and decided to treat me today and took me shopping, so i got a load of new clothes, shoes (which he says i don't need, but i told him women can never have enough shoes, lol) and we got my wedding ring aswell.
Hope you all have a great weekend, mine is going to be spent writing invitations, what fun, lol.
Take care and good luck in whatever stage of treatment you're at.
Lotsa love
Michelle
xxx
My fella was really sweet about it though and decided to treat me today and took me shopping, so i got a load of new clothes, shoes (which he says i don't need, but i told him women can never have enough shoes, lol) and we got my wedding ring aswell.
Hope you all have a great weekend, mine is going to be spent writing invitations, what fun, lol.
Take care and good luck in whatever stage of treatment you're at.
Lotsa love
Michelle
xxx