New IVF'er Feeling Lost In Big Cycle Group - anyone else?

[DandMe]

I'm a new January 1st timer IVF patient. I love the january/february board and enjoy reading all the stories and news, but I struggle to keep up with so many different 'faces'!

I've posted a few times but am finding it challenging not only to get to know people on a personal level, but to get known as well.

I'd just love three or four cycle buddies who I can really cheer for and learn from. I want to stay on the big board - no offense - love the stories - but also would really enjoy some more in depth support.

Am I alone here?

[me2009]

you will find out who you can PM and stuff once on the bigger thread.

we're all in the same boat, but you HAVE to jump in and get wet

[DandMe]

Aw thanks! I've been on forums for a couple years and find it's always challenging to get known on established threads, although they are the most informative and fun to read!

I will of course stay on the bigger thread, just wanting to see if there are any ladies who want a bit of a smaller group to share the road with.

[CT_Michele]

I know how you feel, I remember my first time on these boards. It was overwhelming and there were lots of people on the cycle thread. But I learned very quickly that you don't need to feel bad about not being able to "keep up." Just post when you can, people here are very understanding. You will eventually connect with a few people who might have similar stories to yours, or have ER and ET or beta around the same time. And before you know it, you will be a pro at keeping up with everyone.

I am sure you will find a few people to get to know better. I am not currently cycling, but have been around these boards for a long time and have learned a ton, so if you ever have any questions, or just want to chat or need some support, feel free to pm me.

[DandMe]

you will find out who you can PM and stuff once on the bigger thread.

we're all in the same boat, but you HAVE to jump in and get wet

Thanks so much; I know what you are saying, but I've spent time on 'big boards' a LOT after my miscarriage and two years of infertilty.. I only have a short time until my IVF, and am freaked out! I'm ALSO seeking some one on one with ladies whom I don't have to spend weeks trying to connect with.

I've gotten many pm's so I'm feeling a little more at home here, thanks again!!

[shermy19]

Hi! I know how you feel and no, you are not alone. I don't have a lot of people who understand how hard this is to go through. I am almost 38 and my husband is 39. We have been trying for a little over two years and I am starting lose hope. It is unexplained infertility, which is even more frustrating. I just went through my first IVF cycle and I found out 2 days after Christmas that it was a BFN. I tried to stay positive but I knew the embryos were not of good quality. I will be starting my next cycle in February. Actually, I will start Lupron on Jan 13, wait for my menstrual cycle, go for an ultrasound and then start the rest of my meds. I really do understand where you're coming from. I would love to keep up with you. I'm in NY and I don't really know anyone else who is doing this about the same time as me. Let me know how things are going for you!! Good luck and I wish you all the best!!

[DandMe]

Hi! I know how you feel and no, you are not alone. I don't have a lot of people who understand how hard this is to go through. I am almost 38 and my husband is 39. We have been trying for a little over two years and I am starting lose hope. It is unexplained infertility, which is even more frustrating. I just went through my first IVF cycle and I found out 2 days after Christmas that it was a BFN. I tried to stay positive but I knew the embryos were not of good quality. I will be starting my next cycle in February. Actually, I will start Lupron on Jan 13, wait for my menstrual cycle, go for an ultrasound and then start the rest of my meds. I really do understand where you're coming from. I would love to keep up with you. I'm in NY and I don't really know anyone else who is doing this about the same time as me. Let me know how things are going for you!! Good luck and I wish you all the best!!

Hi Shermy; Great to hear from you. It's not an easy journey. I know I'm not alone when I say I never thought we'd be doing this. IVF was just something you remotely heard about. Now it's taken over a lot of my daily thoughts and time.

I'm really really sorry that you got a bfn. At least it wasn't just before christmas. That little bit of hope is a wonderful thing, but eventually, it's a cruel joke. I hope that you get better quality follies this time around. I was going to do the lupron but they decided I didnt' need the strict downregulation and we are going from BCP right to stims starting on the 15th. I'm nervous and scared and horribly hopeful. Please keep me posted!! Do you keep a blog?

[jaydentd]

Hey Dandme, I'm starting lupron on the 11th for 10 days and then stim for about 14 days.
Shermy- sorry about your bfn

[shermy19]

I do not keep a blog but am also looking for a few people to keep in contact with regularly. It is nice to have someone going through the same thing at the same time. I was really sad about my BFN but I guess I have to move on and try again. This is probably the hardest thing I've ever done. It consumes my every thought. One of my pet peeves is when people say "just relax and don't think about it...it will happen." I would love to keep up with you and see how things progress. You will be a little ahead of me, but not much.

[gi]

Hey Dandme,

I am one of your cycle buddies from jan/feb and at the mo. i am so behind in everyones cycle!!! We have a nice long xmas break here so found it hard to keep in contact and remember everyone but i was part of a very busy july/aug thread and once the thread picks up and everyone is in the height of their cycle its easier to keep up. I was also part of a quiet thread think there was about 4 of us and it was really nice and personnel. I just love all the girls here its great we can support eachother as lots of our family/friends dont really understand what we are going thro. Best of luck xxx

[DandMe]

gi Thanks for the note - I am astounded at your ability to communicate with grace and clairity after reading your siggy.... four bfn's and two miscarriages, and still with a good attitude and helping other ladies out. Hats off to you and I am hoping you get a very sticky bean this time around. Are you doing a full cycle or a FET? How many eggs did you freeze/have implanted?

shermy19 I know... the 'just relax' thing didn't work when I tried it. Well, okay, it kind of did, but I feel it was more of a fluke. We were 'kind of' trying for six months in '08 when I got a bfp but miscarried at 9 weeks. Then we just 'let things happen' until January and started on clomid, got two back to back chemical pregnancies and started medicated IUI's in August. They were either botched by the doctor or bfn's. Screw the relax thing... I'm willing to pay a professional! LOL I do know what you mean, this IVF is just a word or a vague conception to most of the world.. but to me it's what I breathe every day.

jaydentd Yay for starting your lupron. You'll be a bit behind me but it will be more interesting to have things a little spaced out in terms of timelines. That should put you starting your stimms around the 21st, I'll be in the middle of everything by then. *nervous jitter*

[karenthescorpio]

shermy19: I, too, will be starting Lupron near the same time as you. Jan 11th to be exact (as long as blood work is ok on that day). Once AF shows up I'll start a down regulation protocol. A new protocol for me. My last cycle didn't work, also. It was a bit F'd up (long story short). I had to freeze my embies from IVF#1 and do a FET a month later. It was a very emotionally draining experience to say the least. I'm still at the same clinic, but changed doctors (new one is one of the founders). I feel like I'm in better hands. I'm even in a new PGD study where they test all 24 chromosomes. I just won't know if I'm in the test group or not (ugh!). I live in the NYC area...in NJ just over the Hudson River from NYC. Where are you in NY? You can send a PM if you want!

[gi]

Dandme sure i am an ould pro at this ivf business sorry about your miscarriage and chemicals its tough no matter how its done but we girls just gotta keep plodding on if we want our baby. I havent really thought about how many cycles i have done and i dont care how many it takes i Will get a baby if it kills me!!! No frosties left so back to full and vicious cycle, going be on a serious amount of meds due to the NK cells so there wont be any living with me!! The max we are allowed to implant is 2 but if up to me i would implant them all!!

Shermy19 i hate that "relax" crap too, j's mum is convinced we dont need ivf and will conceive naturally!! No matter how much i tell her, js very low sperm count now my killer cells she still thinks it will happen!!

karenthescorpio glad to hear you are more comfortable with your new re it really helps, sorry about your bfn if its any consulation i have had a few of those and it does get easier.

gi xx

[shermy19]

DandMe: I am sending you all of my best thoughts and prayers. Good luck when you start on the 15th…let me know how you are feeling and if everything is progressing nicely (I know it will!!!) I truly appreciate the support. I will let you know when I start my lupron (probably on the 13th). I hate the way it makes me feel, but I guess you have to do what you have to do. <<this IVF is just a word or a vague conception to most of the world.. but to me it's what I breathe every day>> I could not agree with you more!! I don’t think of much else.

Karenthescorpio: I am so sorry to hear about your first BFN…hopefully it will work next time and all of the pain will have been worth it. It is so hard to stay positive, I know! I have never wanted anything so bad in my entire life!!! I live in upstate NY near Saratoga Springs. I go to CNY in Latham. They are so supportive there and I really like my doctor. He is always willing to answer my questions and try to keep me positive. I won’t know for a few weeks if I am continuing the same protocol, but I’m pretty sure it will be the lupron, gonal F, and then ovidrel. I will absolutely be thinking about you. Let me know how things are going. We may be doing this around the same time. I have chosen a plan with up to 4 cycles…I’m so nervous that none of them will work…and then what? Anyway, good thoughts your way.

Gi: I know, people just do not understand that it is all you think about. That’s why it’s nice to talk to people that “get it!”

Thanks to you all. PM me anytime you want…

[shermy19]

I'm just wondering how everyone is doing? I know some of you will be starting soon. Good luck! I start my lupron tonight...