Building your family through Embryo Donation

[lycase]

Hello everyone,

We recently adopted embryos from our clinic and we got pregnant. We are delighted about that and I would love to hear your stories on how you got your embryos or if you are still looking. Maybe we can share ideas and stories to help others still looking.

For those who are pregnant with ED or already have children through ED or expect to do a cycle soon we could also share our embryo stories with each other such as where you found them, how many you were given, was it an easy process, open or closed adoption etc. We could also exchange our feelings if we are pregnant with embryo donation/or children we have and how we intend to tell them (if we do) and what your thoughs about potentiel siblings (if you don't know) that would be true siblings to YOUR child/ren.

Let me know if this is something that might interest you at all.

[brit1612]

My husband and I just had our first child through embryo donation:) Congrats to you on your pregnancy. We did not go through an agency, we did it all on our own. I would be glad to talk to you. I have not met anyone else with children through embryo donation, although I know they are out there.

[lycase]

Hi Brit, I would love talking to you more and know more about how you found your little one...

It must be so amazing to have a child through ED... I can't wait to have mine.

When was your baby born? And how many embryos did you get? Any left for siblings?

I also know there are people who have babies or are pg through ED but the forum about it are rare.
So I hope we can get to see more people join in as they realise their dream through ED.

[brit1612]

He was born on March 23, two days after his due date. I found a site called Miracles Waiting, it is not an organization but a place where embryo donors and potential parents can meet. Almost like a dating site You have to pay a fee to join and there is no gaurantee that someone will choose you. A week after I joined a couple was emailing us, a couple months later we flew to their state to meet them. A couple months later they sent their 8 embryos to us. The first FET we transfered two embryos and ended up having a miscarrage. A few months later we transfered two more and that pregnancy resulted in our son. How far along are you?

[lycase]

March 23rd wow he is just a beany still. Almost 2 months now. How cute and wonderful. Congratulations. So you still have 4 embryos left then right? You could have a sibling for him! And the great thing about your situation is you know the donors and so your son could meet them one day... do they also have children?

I am with Miracle Waiting. Actually I was with them for one year now but noone picked us I guess cause we are in Canada. So we got ours from our clinic but it is anonymous. We have pictures of the donor egg that was used and profiles on both parents but no info on pg or anything like that. We got all of their remainer embryos and used half to create this little one. We are 12w4d now. Just did the IPS screening (NT scan) yesterday and everything looks fine so far.

So I imagine you have an open adoption then? I so wanted that... I wanted my little one to know where he/she comes from. I am a bit worried he/she will feel sad and alone you know!! It would be great if we could have another baby with the left embryos cause then he/she would have one more like them...

[ruthiebabe]

Hi Guys,

If you are interested, there are a couple of excellent UK forums that you could have a look at. They have threads on loads of subjects relating to IVF including ED, surrogacy, treatments abroad in different countries and so on. If you wanted to have a look please go to http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk and http://www.fertilityzone.co.uk.

Regards

Ruth

[lycase]

Thanks Ruth for the tips. I just went to see them but can't really find one on ED and baby through ED.

[brit1612]

lycase- I think we were very lucky to have met someone so soon. I have heard it can take a long time for someone to choose you. I think the reason they did is because we both lived in the south but not too close. They really wanted the children to be raised in the south. At first we didn't really think we wanted it to be open, maybe just info incase of health reasons. But the couple didn't want to donate to a couple that wasn't willing to meet them. They didn't mind how open it was after that point, just wanted to meet us initially. I'm glad we met them. We keep in contact via email and they send me pics of their twins who are about a year and a half. I looked into using our clinic, but they said they rarely have embryos to donate and when they do the waiting list is really long. We do have 4 embryos left and would love for him to have a biological sibling. If you had a bio sibling for your little one, they may not be near as curious about where they came from, and if not, I'm sure they will just be glad to have parents that love them and wanted to bring them into this world I wish there was literature out there about this topic and the best way to go about telling them. I tend to believe they should know from the time they are pretty young, so there are not any surprises, but it is hard to know the right thing. What do y'all plan on doing?

[lycase]

I plan on doing it from the very first start specially that we have other children (ours) and so they already know we did FET for this little one and so they know he/she is NOT ours but someone was nice enough to let us have them. So I intend to make it a play game kind of thing. I hope he/she looks like mom so we can refer to someone but if not oh well. I am sure that if I have another one after that they will be ok. But if none come after then he/she will probably feel left out!

Do you have other children?

[brit1612]

No, we do not have other children. He is our first! I don't know, the fact that he/she already has siblings is great. I am concerned that our little guy may not get to have the experience of growing up with brothers or sisters. Either way I'm sure that your baby will be loved and happy to be a part of your family:) My husband seems to be a little afraid to tell him too early, but it is so hard to judge that perfect time. That is why I feel like they should always know.

[lycase]

I totally agree with you. But you have embryos left right? So you might get a sibling too right?

[brit1612]

Yes, we do. I pray that we will be able to give him a sibling. I just don't know because we had three miscarrages before we finally had him. We will have two chances at a sibling since we have 4 embryos left. I am very happy to just have my son, I just don't want him to miss out.

[lycase]

Sorry about all your mcs. I only had one but my sister had 6. Must be horrible.

When do you think you will try again? IN a year or so?

Helene

[brit1612]

I am a teacher, so I can only really do the cycles in the summer. We will probably enjoy this summer with our little boy, then try again next summer. I am really happy to just not have to think about trying to get pregnant, and am really not looking forward to that ride again. It seems like we have been so consumed with getting pregnant for the last few years.

How about you? Wow, your sister had 6 miscarrages; does she have any kids? It is a really hard thing to go through but once you have a child, it is all worth it.

[lycase]

Well it was because of her age 45. She did have 2 girls before they are now 11 and 13 and now the new baby is one. Yes I think it was worth it but she got her tube tide right after witch I though was really sad.

It's true it will be nice to just relax for one year and just enjoy your baby. That will be amazing.

Me well I will have to try again as soon as I am allowed because I will be 46 and don't want to loose them all due to my age.
So they will be very close in age

Helene