encouraging story

[brit1612]

I have been coming to this board for at least two years now, and I am happy to be able to share a positive story with y'all. I know how nice it is to think that you have a chance no matter what you have been through. If there is anyone left out there that I cycled with, thanks for all of the support. I also wanted to say thanks to Ghost for answering all of our questions in such a timely manner, when you feel so desperate it is great to have the knowledge and honesty.

My husband and I tried for a year naturally before turning to fertility treatments. We were told that we have male factor infertility and that I was normal. We went straight to IVF. The first cycle was a complete bust. I did not respond well to meds (even though I was only 22 at the time) and only had 5 eggs retreived. BFN Our second IVF resulted in an early miscarrage (before the heartbeat was seen). Third IVF was another BFN, and 4th another miscarrage. This time we had a heartbeat and made it to the 8 week mark, but the embryo never looked good to begin with, always very small, etc. At this point the rollercoaster ride was beginning to be too much and we decided we needed to try something that could increase our chances. The doctor still beleived that we could have a child of our own if we were willing to keep going through these ups and downs. I came across embryo donation on the net and thought it sounded perfect for us. My husband and I were not real comfortable with trying sperm donation because we worried about how my husband would feel down the line. With embryo donation we would both have the same situation with the genes of the baby and we would get to carry the child. I started researching and found a site (Miracles Waiting, if anyone is interested) were you pay to meet people who are looking to donate their embryos. There are no organizations involved, so the process can go very fast. We began emailing a couple who was interested in us, and decided to meet them. Within a few months of hearing about embryo donation we were having 8 embryos shipped to us. We soon tried our fist FET, got pregnant, and yet another early miscarrage. We were devestated. I thought this was going to be the immediate answer to our problems. We tried another FET a few months later and fell pregnant again. This time (our 6th cycle) was the one! We just recently gave birth to our first child after 5 years of trying to conceive. He is wonderful and worth the wait. We had scares throughout the pregnancy with a large hematoma, we were not sure if he would survive it, but he did. He is our miracle baby and I just wanted to tell all of you to keep trying and to not give up. We have been through pretty much everything possible with IVF, so if you have any questions that I could help with please let me know, I would be glad to answer them. Sorry for such a long post, just know how much these type of stories meant to me.

[to_have_fun08]

Brit - I believe I cycled with you in Aug 08. Congrats on your baby. Glad it finally worked for you.

[brit1612]

Yes we did. Thank you very much. Are you still trying?

[to_have_fun08]

Yes still trying. Looking to do my 6th cycle in probably July or August. Still working out the details. I am on my 4th RE and now have been diagnosed with insulin resistance and PCOS. RE thinks that is what has been the cause of my poor egg quality. My last cycle was with this RE and the cycle was looking awesome, until I ovulated early. Got 4 eggs but RE thinks the eggs were compromised by my early ovulation and the introduction of the progesterone. So will try it one last time. Don't know why it took 2 yrs and 4 RE's to figure out my problems. Very frustrating. Hoping this next one works because unless i find a money tree, we will defiantly be done.

Chris

[brit1612]

The 6th cycle was the one for us! Maybe it will be your lucky number as well. It sounds like you are working with a better RE now, maybe now that you know the problems you will be able to treat them better. Good luck with everything, hope to be hearing about your pregnancy in the future

[MsThomas32]

Hi,

This is our 2nd go at IVF, can you give me some pointer on what to look for, I know we want to do a 5dy transfer the first time we did a three day, I had 7 folices and got 5 or 6 eggs. three made it to day three and we transfer to neither took. what are some of the things you noticed during your cycle that I should look out for, what about cost how much was each time, did your insurance pay for anything the first time our insurcane paid for testing and medician. we have sinced moved to europe and there saying insurance wont pay of anything. all the help you can give will be greatly appreicated.

[brit1612]

MsThomas,
We did three day cycles with all four of our first natural cycles. Our donor FET's were frozen as 5 day blast. I think that the chance of success is better with day 5 transfers. But the only reason is that if the embryos make it to day 5 they are of better quality. The bad thing is that if you wait until day 5 there is a chance of none of the embryos making it to transfer, but some would probably beleive that they would not have made it anyway if you put them in at day 3. I'm sure that is kind of controversial.

I have learned a lot but I don't know what your situation is, do you know the cause of your infertility? You are like me in the sense that you do know produce that many eggs, but it is quality that counts not quantity. I live in Texas and I am a teacher. Our insurance does not cover any fertility treatments. We paid about $13,000 for our first cycle but we are lucky enough to have a doc that does not charge you much after your first cycle until you have a child. We had to take out a loan for the first cycle and without such a generous doc we would not have been able to continue. Also, the clinic gave us some of our meds. Poeple who have left over meds give them to the clinic. I don't know if other clinics do this but it is worth asking since the meds are soo expensive.

I don't feel like I have helped much, but I'm not sure what you already know about the process and what you have questions about. Let me know what you are curious about and I will try to help more I hope everything goes great for you!

[jenice]

MsThomas- Not sure what your ? is bbut I have done a blast transfer nad had a BFN. I might of been hyperstimulating though which maybe interferred with getting pregnant. Then I had a FET with a 2-cell and a 4-cell and was preganant which resulted in a chemical pregnancy. I will be doing another fresh cycle and transfer 3 3day embies and freeze and others. If you go to blast you could lose all of them. I had 2 frozen right away then had 8 left to go to blast 6 didn't make it and 2 turned to blast which is what they wanted to happen. Now i wonder if the other 6 who didn't make it to blast if any of them would have been a baby ? It is very controversial about this, and I will never know. What I do know is an FET is alot cheaper than a fresh. So, I plan to freeze all so I can to FET's. I could do 5 cycles of an FET to equal one fresh and alot less stress on my body. Good luck with your decision.

[lisa32]

HI Brit,

Ive been with my DP for a few years and we decided to start a family, the thing is my DP cannot have children as he has zero sperm count so we had to get donated sperm from America. We tried IUI 3 times with a BFN. So we thought of doing IVF we might have a better chance with. So in April we started protocal 21day program. I had to inject beruslin everyday then half way through use another drug to inject so 2 x injections everyday. On Tues 11th May I had my EC which was painfull after but there were 5 embryos retrieved but only 4 fertilized with the donanted sperm. Two of the embryos went to blast stage and done very well 5's and 6's which they called a clump. So on Sun 19th May I had the ET and before they inserted they said they improved more since they last looked at it that morning so looked good. So that was that all was done and I was PUPO. Then on Wed 19th May I started to bleed in the evening time very light and only see it on the tissue when wiping myself. I have been bleeding ever since but a little bit heavier now but it doesnt cover the pad only a little and see more when I wipe myself so I would call it spotting. I have been getting the usuall signs cramps, pains in right side then left then all over, sensitive breasts, mood swings, feeling tired and cant walk far the usuall from the progesterone drug. I have heard so many things about women who have bleed and still fell pregg.

My question - Has this happened to you? or do you know anyone it has happened to? What could be the reason for the bleeding?

I have my own theorys but I dont know for sure. If you could be honest with me blunt if you like as Im just fed up with people going round the houses with me and not telling me what they think or know, thanks kind regards lisa32.x

[Ghost]

I also wanted to say thanks to Ghost for answering all of our questions in such a timely manner, when you feel so desperate it is great to have the knowledge and honesty.

Thanks.

We tried another FET a few months later and fell pregnant again. This time (our 6th cycle) was the one! We just recently gave birth to our first child after 5 years of trying to conceive. He is wonderful and worth the wait. We had scares throughout the pregnancy with a large hematoma, we were not sure if he would survive it, but he did. He is our miracle baby and I just wanted to tell all of you to keep trying and to not give up. We have been through pretty much everything possible with IVF, so if you have any questions that I could help with please let me know, I would be glad to answer them. Sorry for such a long post, just know how much these type of stories meant to me.

That's a wonderful story and I am so glad for you! Thank you for posting it here.

FETs are great, and donor embryo cycles should be getting a lot more numerous. Donor embryo cycles are cheap and effective, and make use of embryos that might otherwise have been disposed of.

[brit1612]

lisa- I'm sorry you are having to go through this. It is so hard not knowing what is going on inside of your body. Are you on progesterone? With my miscarrages, I was on progesterone, which can keep you from bleeding. I never really bled until after we knew the fetus had not survived and my doc took me off the progesterone. With my 3rd miscarrage I did bleed, but it was not a gradual thing like you are explaining. One day I was fine and the next there was bright red blood and quite a bit of it. Is the blood bright red, or kind of brown? The only time I have ever had "spotting" was with my little boy. It was around the same time you are having it, but it was usually just on the toilet paper. I assume this was implantation bleeding, but I found out later than I had a subchorionic hemorrage, so it could have been from that. Either way the outcome was good! I'm sorry I don't know the answer, and I am trying to be as honest as possible. Are you still bleeding today? When do you go in for your test? Hope this helps some. Let me know if you have any other questions, I'll be praying for you.

Ghost- I agree. I had never even heard of embryo donation, until I did my own research. I think docs should educate about this option more. Thanks again for everything. I came to you for many of my questions, and was lost when you dissappeared for a while.

[Olivia2501]

Thank you for your post, we just had a successful IVF cycle #1, only to go in at 8 weeks and no heartbeat. I had no signs whatsoever, I was on progesterone so not even a spot. They had to give me misopristol to even start the miscarriage process once a second US confirmed no heartbeat. I am currently waiting for my HCG levels to drop so I can start AF and try IVF #2, our last try. We are self pay as well and my meds last time were almost $5000, with this second IVF, we will have spent close to $30,000 and that does not include all the testing etc.

I have done some research lately about donor embyros. I think it is awesome. My DH has not fully given up on the biological child hope and really I have not either. However after this first IVF failed and now knowing this 2nd try will be it, I think reality is setting in. It is hard to accept sometimes, but my clock is really ticking. Thank goodness we discussed before we got married what we would do if we could not have children, so the adoption conversation is an easy one for us. I have seen friends who did not discuss it and then when they could not have children, their DH was against adoption, so heartbreaking!
I am going to check the website you mentioned, thanks and congratulations!

[brit1612]

Olivia- I'm sorry about your miscarrage. A lot of fertile couples have 1 or 2 miscarrages and still have healthy children, so your chances to go on and have a baby are still very good! We had 3 before we moved on. I know it is hard to give up on having your "own" children, but once you have that baby it is yours, and you really don't think about it much. Good luck on your journey!

[lisa32]

Hi Brit,

Thanks for that and yes it did help at least i know im not having a miscarraige, yes i am still bleeding and its red, but did you have pains like period pains when you had the subchorionic hemorrage and what is that? (sorry if I seem thick lol but I am interesred) Ive been at work walking like john wayne and walking slow like an old lady lol im having hot flushes aswell one minute im hot then cold its all mad. I am bleeding still a little on my pad but when i wipe myself its not good. And im still on the progesterone , I bleed 3 days after my ET and getting down abt it. But what will be will be. I do the test on thurs 27th may 1 days time. Thanks again i dont know what i would do if i didnt have this site, hope to hear from you soon. xxxxx

[brit1612]

Lisa- I don't want to mislead you to think that you are for sure not having a miscarrage. I think that there could be a chance that you are, but I pray that you aren't. My experience was that the progesterone kept me from bleeding. I had no idea that I had the hemmorage until I went for my NT scan (ultrasound at 13 weeks). The spotting had occured earlier on a few different times. I don't really remember having much cramping but I am not sure. With the miscarrages the cramping was really bad, but like I said the bleeding was sudden and heavy with those. Also, on my negative cycles the progesterone stopped me from having AF also. The hemmorage was a bleed in the placenta. It starts as a small tear then a pocket of blood forms. This can cause you to miscarrage, but not always. Mine was really large, but my baby was tough! Good luck on your test tomorrow. Hope everything works out well for you. Let me know how it goes.