Fall 2010 Cycle Group

[klinger13]

Nancy - Welcome!! Glad you joined us on the Fall board! I added you to the list so just keep us posted on when you start and I'll move you down the list.

hopefullintime - I'm sorry the cysts are delaying your cycle another month, UGH!!! That must be so frustrating!!

AFM, I just had my post-op follow-up appt with the RE and all went well. I found out the tube & e/p had adhered to the ovary (same thing happened with my Feb e/p when I lost my right tube & ovary) but this doc was able to "tease" the tube off the ovary and just remove the tube & e/p. Thank God for this doc because otherwise I could have lost my last ovary too. He said the left ovary looks good now - GIANT PHEW!! And he had pics of everything from the surgery for me so I could see the big blood clot, the adhesions, the ovary post-tube removal, etc. It was really amazing to see it all.

Sooo...we should be able to start our IVF cycle mid-October, YAY! We have to wait 2 months after the surgery which is fine because we have to do a lot of the screening before then. DH's S/A will be a year old in Sept so he has to redo that, I need to have the saline sonogram & trial transfer once my next cycle starts, we both need to do the infectious disease screening, etc. Because I only have the one ovary he's going to have me on the antagonist protocol. Thankfully, I can use the Bravelle, Ovidrel, & Endometrin that I already paid for when I was going to do the IUI w/ injectables and I'll just need a bit more Bravelle, another Ovidrel shot, & the Ganirelix. I'm so glad the $1000+ bunch of meds I already bought won't go to waste! So all in all, a very good appointment!

[turtle0619]

amanda soooo exciting!! i'm so glad they were able to save your ovary!!!! yay for getting to use the extra meds from last time!! october will be here before you know it...its one of my favorite months...here in NH its amazingly beautiful even though our quite state gets overrun with "leaf peepers" because experts claim that NH and some place in china (i think) are the 2 perfect places to see the foliage! haha true dat! xoxo

[klinger13]

Thanks Franny! I'm excited to know we've got our plan going into action now. And yeah, at this point I'm glad there aren't any tubes left in there to cause more trouble...GEEZ!! I've never been to NH in the fall, but it must be gorgeous. You'll be chock full of leaf peepers in just a few weeks.

[annashope]

Franny

I really admire your amazing resolve and positive attitude you are awesome and reading your posts has really cheered me up tonight. You are right it will happen to each of us and we have to believe it. I was actually really bummed out earlier...I keep fighting the sadness and telling myself that we are moving forward but right now while I still have HCG in my system it is just really hard I think once we actually get closer to starting it will be easier but until my beta is "0" I am in twilight zone. I will go through 2 or 3 days perfectly fine and think that I am better but then being in this place( still waiting) just brings me down from time to time. It doesn't help that I don't currently have a SINGLE friend who is not preggers ( I know unbelievable!) and my baby sis is 12 weeks pregnant and my who family is so upset and concerned because she is still in high school...I mean she cried on my shoulder yesterday over being pregnant and what can I say... I would give anything to trade places with her but that's not how life works...

Anyways I just wanted to say that you are awesome and such an inspiration and I really appreciate your amazing positive attitude, you are such a strong woman...Thanks so much sweety

[Wondercat]

Well finally got AF last night, but I'm bummed because I guess timing isn't right to start a cycle this time around so all it's done by being late is delay the next cycle. So it's looking like October for me, too. I suspected it would be from my last discussion with my nurse but you can always hope, right? Probably just as well because I have been feeling sick all week from my hormones being all wacky. Taking hormone shots make me feel crazy enough without my own hormones being weird to begin with.

turtle0619 - I used to get inundated with leaf peepers when I lived out in Western MA, fortunately on the Cape we don't get much of a foliage show. We're finally past getting overrun with presidential peepers - traffic has been hideous - about to settle back into the nice quiet off-season.

[turtle0619]

annshope awwww thanks hun!
trust me there are days when i dont feel strong or positive, but i have to snap myself out of it because i cant let myself fall into a blackhole. there are so many things in my life i am thankful for, so i have to remind myself of them all the time. i can sit around and be depressed all the time and ask why? but nobody has an answer for me. all the Dr.'s tell me i'm doing everything right, and its not my fault that i have this disease. i dont know..i think i type stronger then i actually am haha. like if i keep writing it over and over i can will it to happen right? it is crazy that all your friends are pregnant. that happened to me about a year ago....it seemed everytime i talked to someone it turned out they had "great news" to share. of course none of them know what me and DH are going through so they didnt know that i would be fighting back tears and wanting to punch them in the face haha. its so so sooooo hard to be happy for everyone else. it take a lot of strength. my DH says i should be an actress because i fake excitement so well. its getting harder after each failed cycle though. and its even harder when they say things like "we werent even trying" and "all he had to do was look at my and.....poof i'm preggers!!" ahhhhhhhh!!
your sister situation sounds really hard. of course she is freaking out and needs your support, but my lord...i dont know how i would react to that situation. so you are stronger then you think!!
i dont think i realized you had a M/C, and i am so so sooooo sorry to hear that! its going to take some time to get past it..i never got that far along to know what it would feel like to go from the stress of the cycle, to getting good news, to having a loss. its just so unfair! the good news is you did get pregnant, and it WILL happen again.
ok...this maybe shouldve been in a PM...sorry for the long rant!
xoxo

[lou71]

Hi ladies,

I'm just popping in to say hello. Nothing really happening over here. I am on BCP's and don't have my baseline until 9/17. I'm worried about Lupron working for me. It takes a lot to suppress me. So I hope I don't find out I have a cyst on the 17th. DH and I are going to NYC and have tickets for the US Open tennis tournament Labor Day weekend. I'm still pretty bummed about my last BFN, but I'm trying to get excited. I'm hoping my PMA is in NYC and I can be reunited with it.

Nancy -- Glad you'll be getting the green light to get started soon.

Klinger -- Awesome you will get to put those meds to good use. Antagonist protocol is the one that works best for me as well.

Wondercat -- Sorry AF came late and you're delayed. That stinks! Are you doing a FET also? We might fall close together then.

Franny -- You really are an inspiration. I feel lucky to know you. Much love.

[annashope]

Thanks so much again Franny you managed to say everything I am thinking...My DH also thinks that I have become an actress because I fake it so well now the excitement and the lie that I am fine when my heart is constantly broken. Today is our 4 year anniversary and I don't even feel like celebrating but like you said you just do it and hope that it will get better. Sorry to the rest of you for being such a downer I love you

[Lauren319]

anna - i say we steal the baby and raise it as our own. no, seriously, I'm sorry. It's hard to stay strong. I understand. In fact, I hate every mother on the street right now.

Wondercat - I'm sorry about your delay. If it's any consolation, maybe it'll mean it'll actually work this time..your body being ready and all. I don't know anything and I know phrases like that tend to piss me off sometimes, so all I can say is "sorry".

Franny, Lou, Amanda - I don't even know what board to write on and when anymore. Thanks for being there for me though. I'll get to the other board to cheer the others on, but know that I'll be here doing my next cycle with all of you.

AFM - yep. that's right. I'll be joining you as a cheerleader and a fall cycle buddy. BFN for me. This board has better luck. I can feel it.

[annashope]

Lauren sweety I am so sorry for the BFN but we will get there I know it. I love your sense of humor...maybe we should steal one...lol in all seriousness it always pisses me off that there are so many orphans in this world and so many women that would make amazing moms and there is just no way of putting the two together without shelling out thousands of dollars without guarantees. DH and I started the adoption process a year ago and now found out that our agency is often dishonest and lie...completely heartbroken about that too. How unfair! all we want is to be a mommy to a baby and yet so much heartbreak and pain and struggle...when someone I know is upset because they "got pregnant and didn't want to" it just makes me sick...I don't mean special circumstances but a friend of mine was preg with a perfectly healthy baby and stable relationship and I had to put up with her crying "she didn't get enough partying under her belt" it just made me sick!!! people just don't understand what kind of a miracle it is...I would do anything to have an OOPS pregnancy!!! Anyways Fall will bring us more luck!

Wondercat I completely understand the frustration over the delay. I was originally told that by sept 1st I would most likely have a normal AF and October will be our next try but now it is almost Sept and my HCG is still in 400's and of course no AF so now they are saying "MAYBE November it all depends" I am in complete limbo and I so badly wish I could just get past this and start again. You are not alone sweety I am here too.

Amanda my heart goes out to you sweety..you have had to go through so much you soooo deserve this already. I am praying for you and maybe we will be cycling together in October

[klinger13]

annashope - Thank you so much and I really hope your limbo ends soon! Hopefully in the next week or two, they'll be able to give you a better idea of the timeframe so you don't have to hear the "MAYBE November it all depends." And I figure if I start mid-October (assuming my cycle(s) start when they should) my ER/ET won't be until November so I think there's a real good chance we'll be cycling together.

lou - your Labor Day weekend sounds like it's going to be a fun one! And I'm glad to hear you've had good results from the antagonist protcol.

lauren - While I'm still sad about your BFN, I'm glad you're joining us on the Fall thread! I LOVE your sense of humor so I know you'll bring us lots of laughs. And I think our thread's going to be a lucky one too!

franny - I know you're on the Summer group list, but would you like me to add you to our list over here too? Like I told you before, we'll cheer you on no matter where you are but I didn't want to add you over here without checking with you first.

wondercat - I'm sorry the late AF is causing you to have to wait until next cycle! That must be so frustrating. I hope you're feeling better now after not feeling so great this week.

[klinger13]

-hopefullintime (Dee)
-klinger13 (Amanda)
-yingz (FET Sept)
-annashope (October)
-nbfun (Nancy)
-lauren319


-Wondercat
-BLang4d (Brandy)


-lou71 (start Lupron on 9.7/baseline appointment is on 9.17/FET w/ 2 frosties planned for 10.15)




-Tiger04 (Femara then IUI 8/28-8/29)







on your journey

[turtle0619]

amanda haha i was just going to post over here that you might as well add me to the list!! i'm gonna be over on this thread all the time anyway so i should just join already!! i hope i dont jinx this thread like i seem to do for every thread in the last year!! (yes thats right...my first cycle thread was an august/sept 2009 board!! seriously...its wicked depressing!!)
anyway if you all will have me i'd be happy to join in!

so as of today i started my first injection...not stims yet...i am on an estrogen priming antagonist protocol...(longest name ever!!) so i had to detect my LH surge, and then wait 10 days and start on an estrogen patch (which i started yesterday) and then i do 3 days of ganirelix injections (an antagonist) and keep changing my estrogen patches every other day. once i get my AF (which should be sunday/monday) i will go in for a day 2 SnS and if everything is good i will actually start my stims that night!! confusing right??? man i hope its the thing that does the trick!!
me and DH had a talk the other day, and we both decided that over a year of IVF was enough for us. this will be our last try. if this cycle doesnt work we will move on to embryo adoption which we are both very excited about. we shall see!

annshope happy anniversary!! please go enjoy yourself! 4 years married to your DH is an amazing thing to have in your life. take time to reflect on all the happy times you have had in your marriage and celebrate each other! xoxo

lou you are amazing too my dear friend!! i hope you didnt get upset at what i wrote on the summer thread. i didnt want it to upset you or make you think i didnt think you deserved to grieve! NYC is going to be soooo much fun. hopefully it cools off a little next weekend so the city wont be so harsh. you will find your PMA!! what else do you plan to do on your trip? i love NYC and go there as often as i can afford. where are you staying? i know some fun bars in the village if you need some ideas! xoxo

lauren does this mean you are right back in the game again?? thats what i usually need to do to get over the pain and heartbreak of a BFN....get a new plan in motion asap!! what did you end up drinking last night?? i'm thinking of you tons!!

tammy thinking of you! how are you doing?? xoxo

to everyone else...HI!!

[lou71]

lou you are amazing too my dear friend!! i hope you didnt get upset at what i wrote on the summer thread. i didnt want it to upset you or make you think i didnt think you deserved to grieve! NYC is going to be soooo much fun. hopefully it cools off a little next weekend so the city wont be so harsh. you will find your PMA!! what else do you plan to do on your trip? i love NYC and go there as often as i can afford. where are you staying? i know some fun bars in the village if you need some ideas! xoxo

Franny --- Aww... thanks. Yes, give me the rundown and any ideas you have for us to do or places to go in NYC. We will have some free time and have Friday 9/3, completely free. We are staying in the Tribeca/SoHo area. And no... I wasn't upset. You were right. I know I'm a lot more down than I should be. I've been pregnant... and man, I was close. I really thought I was going to get to keep it. But it wasn't to be. Now I just had the best cycle yet with 6 perfect embies on day 3.... which turned into 4 terrific blasts. 2 to transfer, and 2 to freeze. And it was BFN. So I got really down thinking that if my very very best isn't good enough... then it's just never going to work. I know that isn't necessarily true. I'm just very scared of that thought and of going broke trying! DH and I had a talk, we aren't yet ready to give up on my own eggs yet. We're going to try a couple more times if we can swing it. It's been over a year for me too. My first cycle was Aug/Sept 2009... it got cancelled because I ovulated right through the Lupron. I remember you from that cycle as well. We've been in this together the whole friggin' time!!!! You aren't a jinx!! Not at all. In fact... this time is OUR time and we will get our BFP's! Your protocol changes will be just what you need for a fantastic cyle that ends in a BFP and one of my two frosties is going to hang on like hell and stick this time. I'm not taking any other answer!!!!

[Lauren319]

Franny - I'm now posting a message to you on the other board too I'm jumping right back in! In fact, I have an appt in an hour to go over my options. If all goes well, it looks like I can do next month. I'm gonna push for as soon as possible. I'm not a sit-around-and-wait kinda girl...and I'm a total ***** and normally get what I want, so I think the RE is gonna have to agree. Funny thing about last night. I got the BFN call and realized we had an expensive bottle of champagne in the fridge, so I popped it open and started in drinking from the bottle. My sister called and asked what I was doing...all I said was that I was drinking champagne and she said, "Lauren, get a glass, that's pathetic." Don't know how she knew, but she did. Anyhow, I had ONE GLASS and passed out for three hours. I woke up to find the my husband drank the rest of the bottle and two manhattans and was TRASHED. Poor DH. I forget how hard it must affect him too.

Lou - DH and I lived in Manhattan for 10 years and just moved two years ago! Let me know what you wanna do and I'll give you ideas! In fact, he's going to be there Labor Day weekend for a wedding. I'm invited, but I decided that I couldn't go pregnant and now I don't think I wanna go fat