The Over 40 Crowd

[ButterflyKiss]

I am doing good thanks!

Hubbyman and I have been enjoying some time together on some wonderful road trips. Today we actually saw 2 black bears on our travels, so that was a nice treat especially since we saw one last weekend we were out.

I have been trying to live out my dream as if we are not having children and it has been very good so far until I feel the pang of having babies again. It looks like, so far, that we may enjoy what we have and travel, which I have been missing and go from there. We are actually considering moving to just outside of where we live now and also getting a dog, an Alsatian=German Sheperd We have 4 cats already so adding a dog to the mix would be nice!

I hope everyone else out there is well

Blessings,

[Catharine]

Greetings ladies !

Butterfly kisses my heart goes out to you. I know the struggle. As Sunshine and stars eluded to, our bodies have a limited time left for this process. I advise creating the tmt fund and it can be converted to the travel fund if your hearts change about family. Or you could combine the process an IVF vacation. I would make sure that both of you are secure in that decision because it's hard to look back on 'what if's'. As a final thought relax, yoga, acupuncture and prayer can be very helpful. As a final question really, have you considered financing the tmt? [ http://www.justmommies.com/articles/pay ... ents.shtml ] additionally there are scholarships and grants available for tmt [www.inciid.org or cadefoundation.org ]. I hope this information is helpful. My thoughts and prayers are with you during your journey.

Sundshine and Stars-what wonderful news. Wishing you and your DH a pg full of blessings.

AFM and this new journey. DH and I had our psych evaluation at the end of July and we came out looking pretty normal, no indicators to flag us as incompetent. Whoot Woo! We met with the RE over a week ago. Surprisingly she was ready to start this month with the process. I was shocked as we were heading out of the country for a week, AF was due during that time and there still was so much more to be done. In short, we have deferred for another month or so. So, the RE is waiting for the competency report from the psychiatrist. At which point the RE can then issue an autherization letter for release of donor sperm [a few points that were not quite in place at the meeting with the RE over a week ago]. We recieved a donor catalog to thumb through. But the meat of the donors is really accessible on line. It is a crazy process. I find myself struggling with, 'is this really how we want to achieve our dream?' It is nerve racking to say the least. I need to start following my own advice on relaxing

Hello to everyone else. Wishing everyone well and sending out loads of PMA

Cheers!
Catharine

[sunshine and stars]

Hi Catherine and BFK,
We've been out of commission for a few days-- trying to soak up the last bit of vacation. Had acupuncture today and will have a 10 week discharge appt with RE next week. So far so good. Wicked car sick (afternoon sickness) though. Trying to keep most food down. Hormones are all over the place but that's okay...I figure it's a good sign.

Good to hear from you both.

Catherine, you have a good point re. finances and keeping aside a fund... you never know, feelings change.

Peace,
Sunshine

[ButterflyKiss]

Catharine I truly appreciate your post. Thanks so very much! It's funny as just last week I started my period and was crying and telling hubbyman that we should go for IVF and he said yes! That truly surprised me as I never expected him to state so. He stated that he feels for me and thinks like you we should just save a ton of money and see what happens next year I do not want to have regrets and tbh, I have been swaying from no babies to yes babies of late! As for financing, my hubbyman will not let me do this so that is out of the option, we must do this the 'old fashioned way' of saving and saving some more Oh, and since we live in Canada all of this will be oop, so those companies are no good for us. I appreciate your taking the time to look those up for me though, it was still good reading. I just wish these companies existed here too

I'm so happy that you and hubby are moving forward with DS I hope it all works for you. I know we have already discussed this and he would rather we try IVF/ICSI until something happens.

Sunshine sorry about the sickness although I am sure if gives you some reassurance that all is well with your body and with baby

Hello to everyone else out there!

Blessings.

[babyblue]

Hello "Over 40 Crowd",

I have not been on here in a long time. I have tried to read up and saw a few names I remember.

Tammy, Congrats on the adoption from China. Is Andrew going with you to China to get the baby? It is just a couple of months away. I wish you all the best.

Rasmina, saw your post a couple of times. Sounds like life is going great for you and your family.

BFK, Best of luck with the savings, and hope you have wonderful news this time next year.

AFM - I have 4 1/2 mo. old twins (boy & girl). We named them Jesse and Jillian. My 11-yr old ds (Max) loves them unmeasurably. I thought I was bad about kissing on them all the time - ds pratically smuthers them. Ladies, I just turned 50 yesterday and I am the happiest mom on earth. DH and I tried for 5 years and I have no regrets what so ever about my age or carrying twins. They were born 3 1/2 wks early but weighed 6.7 and 6.4 lbs. and didn't have to spend any time in NICU. They are so healthy and such happy babies. I guess as of yesterday I should officially be on another thread. Listen to your heart and pray for your desires - God listens.

Kim

[mamad]

Hi Everyone

KIM: Thank you so much for your post it really encouraged me, REALLY. Do you mind if i ask you, how many DE did you transfer and what was the difference between this time and the other time you used a DE? I too want to do this after failed attempts at using my own. Did you still have to have medication?, or did your donor?

Mny thanks,

Desperate Mama D,

[mamad]

HELP FOR OVER 40 BEING PRESSURED

Hello all, I'm super stressed as after failed ivf attempts my doctor advised me to stsrt another round very soon. The thing is we dont have the funds, we saved ages for the last lot. We've both started new jobs too so the timing is off.We want to use donor eggs anyway so I told doctor we wanted to start early next year then we'll have more time AND money-he said no way!

He really upset us, I now feel even more stressed than before. I've started an important job and cant quit without money, we're already broke fromm the last round. When I'm confident i say 'well I think we should listen to our hearts' but the doctor says it must be now or never.-WHAT TO DO I'm 43. no kids HEEEEEEEEEELP!

[babyblue]

MamaD, the only meds that I had was progesterone by shot, mouth, and supp. I did have to start off with the Lupron shots in the stomach to make sure I was on the same schedule as my donor. The other thing is this third donor was PROVEN. That is the teminology that our Dr. used to show her eggs produced viable pregnancies. I believe over her 3 years, there was only one case that didn't take. We shared a cycle with another couple and we had 4 good eggs to put back in, but we elected to do three because I wouldn't sign a form to do selective reduction if all 4 took. My beta numbers were really high and I tested BFP almost 4 days before I went for my blood HcG test. Unfortunately at 8 weeks I miscarried one, but with a few progesterone shots and a week of bedrest, I carried the other two successfully. I worked up until 3 weeks before they were born. If there were any advice that I could give to those using donor eggs, ask your Dr. if the donor is PROVEN. Also ask if that donor has produced successful pregnancies and percentages if possible. Also, MamaD, ask to share a cycle and it really cuts down on the cost.

As for the age thing, my Dr. was tollerant but every paper I signed or he processed throughout the IVF - he put my age at the top and said that he would not let us do this beyond 50. And lastly, pray about it. My DS prayed every night for a brother or sister or both and he got both.

[mamad]

Thanks Kim,

Its great to feel hopeful again. We need to wait and thats that. There are other clinics and other doctors to help I must remember that.

Did your donor have to go through any other medication or traetment apart from egg collection?

What does it mean to share the cycle with someone?

Mamad

[mamad]

Hi again Kim,

also did you know the age of your donor, and what she looked like?

Mamad

[sunshine and stars]

Hi Friends,
I haven't posted in a while because I was waiting for some scans. All is well so far. Just wanted to say thanks for the inspiring stories. I wish everyone the very best--

[mamad]

I may as well leave this forum. I appear to be the only person without anything positive to say. BFN BFN BFN BFN BFN BFN BFN BFN .......................

[teachertam]

Hello Ladies:

Sorry that I have not posted in awhile.

Mamad: Sorry to hear your news. Is your Dr. encouraging another IVF cycle with your eggs? If you use donor eggs you can wait until you have enough money saved. If he/she is not supportive, find another Dr. who is supportive and understanding. IVF is a major expense if you have to pay out of pocket!! We had to pay out of pocket too, as our state does not provide coverage. I got pregnant naturally while waiting to do a frozen cycle at 42 years old. A friend of mine got pregnant naturally at 45 and now has a 10 month old baby. It can happen, but the older we get the chances of conceiving naturally decrease. We tried femara for a few cycles last year, but did not get pregnant. It did give me multiple eggs, but still no pregnancy. We decided to proceed with the adoption, which has been in progress for more than 4 years now!

Kim: Congrats on the twins! I agree about prayer working too. We expect to get our referral from China in December and then travel Jan/Feb. I am not going to take Andrew with me, as it would be too stressful. Even though I will miss him soooooooooooooooo much, he is going to stay home with my DH. I am taking my 27 year old niece with me to China. She is so excited to be going with me and she will be a big help. I cannot imagine going by myself.

Sunshine: How is the pregnancy progressing? Sorry to hear about your sickness.

Hello to Catharine, BFK, Yasmina and anyone else that I failed to mention.

Tammy

[Catharine]

Greetings Ladies

Quite a bit of activity here of late.

Kim Congrats on the twins. I bet they are keeping you busy.

MamaD I agree with Tammy, if your re is not supportive of the donor route then perhaps it is time to find a new RE.

Sunshine- glad to here all is progressing well. I will keep you and your wee one in my prayers during this part of the journey.

Tammy-keep us posted as your plans develop. So happy for you and your family.

AFM-well a lot has happened since my last post. We are moving to a more child friendly house for one. Can you say stress? On top of it I just started a cycle for IUI. This means we have selected a donor. Sadly and much to my chagrin this isn't any less expensive than us doing IVF. Turns out there is a 6 vial minimum and a vial is quite expensive and the price of stims have gone up dramtically. It is less expensive than the donor egg route. Having this realization I wonder if we should have just gone to donor eggs. Can't worry about it now. No should haves, would haves, nor could haves here. So if all goes as scheduled We should be having the insemination a week from Sunday.

Hi to all the other women [and men] lurking in the background.

Wishing everyone well.
Cheers!
Catharine

PS-can some one assist me in how to fix my little tickerfactory signature at the end. It worked for a long while then a few months back it stopped. Much appreciated if someone could help.

[mamad]

HELP ME Ladies

Shall i do another cycle with my own or go straight to donor? thinking about time-and money. Any advice, suggestions experiences?

mamad