Fall 2010 Cycle Group

[TammyS]

Lou...Good Luck today!! I just know today is going to be a great day! Unfortunately, we will be gone doing fun fall/halloween things all day...so I wont get your good news till tonight. Ester leave me a private message on FB...so I can have my niece look it up for me while we are out and about. lol

Ester...doing okay. Just keeping my distance right now...trying to figure out if we will start again next weekend or not. Yep, that's right...I got the green light to begin again already. Crazy huh?

Teresa...I'm sooo sorry to hear that you lost one of the twins...so sorry. My prayers are with you.

Rio...Tell your mom to stuff it...or pitch in and help if she doesnt like it. Grrr.

AFM: Had a saline ultrasound done last week and apparantly my fibroids/polyps arent really an issue (in the lining)...so that is good news, but not. Guess this means that it is more likely a chromosomal issue...and makes me even more scared to try again. I honesly dont know if I would be a good mom to a special needs child...which I know is ridiculous...but I'm still scared. I suppose that is normal.

So guess what? My SIL/BFF and my little brother are pregnant again. They have 4 kids between them and none together. Brady bunch style. 19, 12, 10, and 9 years old. Becky and I have been wanting to get pregnant together and I have been begging them for 3 years now ...so that Zach would have someone to grow up. Well, she went off the pill a few months ago...and even though my brother wasnt completely on board...he did say, whatever happens happens...and it did. On Zach's bday of course. lol He is super psyched now. I'm so super thrilled for them, but yet sooo sick to my stomach, too. Everyone in my family is super excited and already buying stuff for them...which really hurts my feelings...cause we announced a few weeks before they did and they didnt seem as excited. I do understand why, but it still hurts all the same. IF we start again next weekend with my next AF and get pregnant and stay pregnant...our babies will be approx 3 weeks apart...due to my having to deliver no later than 36 weeks. That would be sooo awesome and I'm praying hard that this will be the case...but I'm still afraid to try again. Our kids would be in the same class, same neighborhood (when we finally move), and possibly the same activities, etc.

To make matters worse...on my local mommy's board...2 babies were born this week...4 more announced in the past week and 2 of those are miracle natural pregnancies of girls who needed IVF the first time around. I'm super psyched for everyone...but cant help but feeling jealous too. Actually right now we have around 30 girls who are pregnant with their 2nd or 3rd child right now...and approx 12 girls who just delivered in the past few months. Most of these girls...I was pregnant with them...when pregnant with Zach. It just sucks. I dont usually feel like this...so this feeling is all new to me.

Yesterday, October 15th is Rememberance Day of all babies lost...(if you didnt know)...and I was invited to a bereavement to light candles for each of my babies lost (someone made them and personalized them too)...but I could not make myself go. I just know that hearing the stories and seeing pics of peoples babies who were stillborn (one girl whom I know from my mommys board)...would send Bill and me over the edge...and we would definitely not be trying again. I want to try again...and honestly we probably will begin again next weekend...I guess we just arent actually ready to say it out loud. Silly, huh?

Anyhow, I have been here reading...and wanted you all to know that you are all always in my thoughts and prayers. Love to all!

[amanda1979]

Lauren: I am so sorry & I am with you the hell with IVF right now. there are no words to say to help you but I vote to go out & drink maybe even start a fight:) well maybe not the fight I hope to see you on here soon and you can PM if you like anytime.

riogirl71: WTF?? I am pissed off and I don't know you or your mom, but ur story makes me want to jump on plane from Alabama to California and kick some ass. Like IVF isn't hard enough with the stress of your mother too. Good Grief some people just don't get it.

Lou: I can't wait to hear your results. I will check this board as soon I get up today.

AFM: Nothing much happening on my end. The patient that hit me was moved to psych ward where he should have been to start with and I decided not to press charges. I went shopping for a small t.v and came home with a 50inch plasma t.v I should not be allowed to go shopping without supervision.

[klinger13]

Rio - I am so sorry your mother is being so shitty to you!! I know it's hard, but do NOT listen to a word she is saying. I'm sure you are doing a wonderful job, don't let her make you doubt yourself. She's probably jealous of the success you've made for yourself (engineer, DH, son) and her way of dealing with it is to be evil. She would prefer you take time away from him to clean your house and put on makeup?? Sorry, but she's on crack! A clean house and size 2 is not what your son and husband love about you, so screw her and her wacky scale of what's important in life. I know she's your mom and I'm sorry if anything I said upsets you, but I'm angry at her right now. I seriously think if my mother ever said things like that to me I'd point her to the door and tell her not to bother coming back.

Meinemo - Good luck today with ET!!! You'll be PUPO later today, yippee!!!

Lou - I cannot wait to hear your results today!!! I have everything crossed, said about a million prayers, and sending positive vibes from NJ to IL. I'll be stalking today for sure!

Sonya - So great to hear from you!!! Wow on 32 - I can't even imagine!! I'm glad you've got some embabies going strong and good luck with ET tomorrow!!

Osi - 50???? Goodness, that's literally like 10 times what I'm cooking! Exciting that your ER is getting closer. We may be pretty darn close with our ER actually.

babyblu - Glad you're feeling a lot better! And wishing you good luck tomorrow with your ET! Be sure to let us know how it goes.

Ester - Great news that you'll be starting back up on the Lupron on Friday and woo-hoo for baby-in-a-box arriving today!! I'm sooo ready to cheer you on!! And your personals mentioned Brandy - we've been on another board together the last couple of years and she posted there to say her HPT yesterday was negative so now she's just waiting for her WTF appt. So disappointed for her.

Kaylie - Glad ET went well and congrats on being PUPO! What day is your beta? And sorry you're battling that fever - hoping you'll feel better soon.

Anniegirl - Glad to hear stimming is going well! Keep us posted on your progress!

Tammy - Glad you checked in. I've been thinking about you and hoping you were ok!

AFM - SnS went well and my little ovary is doing a good job. 5 measurable follies this time - smallest being 7x8 and largest being 15x16. Then the others were in the 12, 13, 10 range. Doc said they looked great, especially compared to just a couple days ago. The increase in Menopur and addition of Ganirelix seem to be doing their magic in getting them to mature. So I stay on my 6 Bravelle, 3 Menopur, and 1 Ganirelix. Which of course means after tonight I'm out of Bravelle AGAIN. So today I'll make the quick drive up to Alexander's in Trenton and hand over another $750 for 3 MORE boxes of Bravelle UGH!!! That will be enough to get me through Sunday and Monday (nurse is guessing I may be ready to trigger by Tuesday and I sure do hope that's the case!) Next SnS Monday morning...


-hopefullintime (Dee) – Sept/Oct
-yingz - FET Sept
-lauren1171 – Oct/Nov D&C then fresh
-Cheri76
-Sher – FET Sept/Oct
-moorebaby (Ester) – start Lupron 10.22, AF/start stims approx 10.29
-kbillsy – Sept/Oct
-anacris (Nov)
-babidreamz – starting IVM early Oct
-amanda1979 – Waiting until January
-karenthescorpio – Oct/Nov
-taxcplforivf (Ginger) – started Lupron 9.21, needs D&C then can start back up
-Lauren – baseline 10.11, start estrogen, then AF, then stims – ER approx wk of 10.29


-Wondercat – Sept/Oct
-annashope – FET November
-riogirl71 – baseline end of October


-karin1 – BCP, start Lupron 10.16, ER for ED 11.9
-jenna81078 – BCPs, baseline 11/8


-LisaB75 – start Lupron 10.6, start stims 10.23
-rypell1985 (Ryann) – FET start Lupron 10.11


-coop2010 – start Lupron 9.17, Follistim 10.1, ER approx 10.9, ET approx 10.14
-Osi – started injections 9.19, start stims 10.7, ER approx 10.20
-klinger13 (Amanda) – start BCPs 9.21, start stims 10.8, ER approx wk of 10.18
-nbfun (Nancy) – start BCPs 9.14, start Lupron 9.28, start stims 10.9, ER approx wk of 10.18
-Anniegirl – starts Lupron 10.7, on stims, ER approx 10.21 or 10.22
-margi26 – IUI w/ injectables, start stims 10.14
-crystal335 – ovulated thru Lupron, start stims 10.16


-carebear77 (Carrie) – ER 10.11
-Meinemo – ER 10.13 w/ ET 10.16
-DandMe (Sonya) – start stims 10.1, ER 10.12 w/ ET 10.17
-baby_blu73 – ER 10.13, ET 10.17


-lou71 - start Lupron on 9.7, baseline 9.17, FET w/ 2 frosties 10.7, Beta 10.16
-kynlee – FET 10.5, Beta 10.18
-macfamily – ER 10.5 w/ ET 10.8, Beta 10.19
-andrea4 – ER 10.10 w/ ET 10.13, Beta TBD
-FrecklesDC (Kaylie) – stims, ER 10.12, ET 10.15, Beta TBD


-hopeforbabies (Teresa) – ER 9.7, ET 9.10, Beta 9.22 = 276, 9.24 = 534, u/s 10.1 – Twins! Next u/s 10.11 – Singleton
-Tess69 – FET 9.22 (2 5-day embies), Beta 10.1 = 150, Beta 10.6=1066, Beta 10.13 = 15000, u/s 10.26
-Krys – FET 9.23 (2 3-day embies), Beta 10.7 = 45. Beta 10.9 = 85, Beta 10.12 = 241, Beta 10.15 = 337

on your journey
-DCRunningMama
-Tiger04
-dvcantu7378 (Victoria)
-TammyS
-turtle0619 (Franny)
-chilipepperrose46
-lauren319
-BLang4d (Brandy)

Waiting for an update
-dawgs1257 – ER 9.3 w/ ET 9.6, Beta 9.20 - ??
-jla018 – stimming away - ??
-shahney (Alicia) – started stims 9.16 - ??

[TammyS]

Amanda...Good to hear that the nut is in the psych ward now where he belongs. Hope you are feeling better now, too. 50" plasma tv...you know...you could always ship it to me, and then you wont feel so guilty buying it! lol

Klinger...Thanks! I so want to have you add me to "Waiting for AF". Why cant I just say it already? I know in my heart that we are going to start again...I guess I am waiting for some huge flashing sign that says "Dont do it". I was praying last week for a sign on what to do...and within hours I got the call from my SIL that they are pregnant. Of course my first thought was "this is my sign...go for it"...then of course I twisted things to think maybe this means that Zach will have a playmate now...and no need to try again. See what I mean? Yes, maybe I'm overthinking things, but it's a huge decision. I knew the minute I wrote to you girls ...I was going to want to be added to the list again. lol I believe that IF we do this again...our ER will be around Nov 5th...and close to alot of you.

Krys...Praying hard for you...keep the faith and hang in there! I'm sure all is fine...when is your next beta?

Tess...Congrats mama!

Chili and Franny...How are you girls doing? Next steps? Miss you.

Sonya...very exciting news! You will be PUPO soon! Yayy!

Hi to all the new girls whom I dont know yet.

[karenthescorpio]

Lou- thinking of you today. Will be stalking the boards!

Tammy - Glad to see you check in. Yesterday I lite two candles at 7pm in memory of my twin girls, Lillian and Reagan. It made me sad ,but I'm glad I did it. I try not to let myself get caught up everyday in my grief. I have to stay positive and move forward! I understand why you didn't want to go to the event. Sending you a big hug.

Rio- Are you shitting me about your mom? Man, I thought my mom was the queen of insensitive!!! Let me tell you something. You are a strong, sensitive, successful and powerful woman. There is no validity to your mothers' comments. Those are her insecurities, not yours. With all due respect to her, who does she think she is coming into another person's house (even if it is her daughter) and insulting her? You are 39 years old. Not a child. Honestly, I'd tell every thought on my mind. Everything you wrote in your rant to us, I'd tell her. Put her in her place and remind her of what she IS. Enough is enough already. I don't know if her mom was like that to her (rude, insensitive, jealous), but you have to stop the cycle. It is completely unacceptable to treat your daughter like that. Especially a loving, strong, successful, happy and kind daughter. I know it is hard to go down that road, emotionally especially. I had to do it...and now my mom keeps her trap shut. I've accepted I'll never having an emotionally comforting mom. And that's ok. Atleast I don't have to deal with her insults anymore. Sending you a big hug. Hope she is leaving soon. Maybe ask her to go early. xoxoxoxoxo

[macfamily]

Lauren- My thoughts are with you!
Lou- Waiting to hear your good news!

AFM- Crampy. Convinced that it's AF cramps, and I think if i wasn't taking endometrin & estrace she would be right around the corner. My normal luteal phase is 12 days, which of course today is the 12th day. And yes, of course I POAS (I'm 9dp3dt)and it was negative. I just want to move on to the FET cycle and put this crappy one behind me! ugh! I keep going back and forth about what I should have done differently- I think the major screw up was that we should have had a 5 day transfer instead of the 3 day.

[margi26]

Lou: Got EVERYTHING crossed for you.... almost puking at the movies...definitely a good sign..

Sonya: Yeah!! All looks good...PUPO before you know it!

Rio: If only it were so easy to tell your mom where to stick it...so sorry. I completely understand. And rationally you are telling yourself all the right things--you are successful as an engineer (no easy feat) have an awesome 2 yr old, awesome pets, awesome husband--who cares about a few extra lbs. I myself have gained about 15 since I started this journey and can't seem to get to the gym, beat the battle with hormones/metabolism/everything else that adds to it. But the bottom line is that she will have that power over your emotions as long as you let her--'cause she is your mom. What I had to do regarding my emotionally insensitive mom--who totally doesn't get IVF, and everything is always about "her"--is to distance myself. It would be nice if we could unload and tell the truth about things, but that isn't always realistic or possible in my opinion. I recommend you distance yourself--especially as you go through IVF and need to be surrounded by love and support. Do the things you like--and the things that fulfill you. Surround yourself with positive people (even if they don't know about your IVF they can be a support without knowing it). Live your life how YOU want to and how YOU know is best for you and your family. Just keep mom at a distance--emotionally and physically--next time don't let her stay so long. Make excuses, blame the dogs, whatever!! She probably never got the support herself and doesn't know how to do it, but that isn't your fault and you shouldn't have to deal with it. Especially not now at this point in your life. Sorry if I went on too much, but this hit a nerve, can you tell You are awesome! Not perfect--who is? But you are an intelligent, beautiful, strong IVF lady and momma!!!! you go girl and block her out!!!

Lauren319: It is all so unfair. Take your time...come back when ready...I totally relate. My m/c after Beta Hell this past summer was almost too much for me. The BFN thread helped me vent and relate to others that were going through it too....do whatever you need--and know we are here for ya. PM if you want.

Tammy: So great to hear from you again!! Ready to start this weekend1 AWESOME! I totally hear you on the hesitation and apprehension....at first after my m/c this summer I thought I was done. Then I got all excited and PMA after new doctor who will be doing IUI with me. Now that I started stimming 2 days ago--I am feeling down and depressed and apprehensive about the entire stupid thing. But I think you should take it all as a positive sign and the green light and move ahead!!! This is your time!!

AFM: Stimming away...hoping it isn't a waste at such a low dose. Not gonna vent now.

Baby dust to all you strong, beautiful, IVF women!!!! It takes more to go through this process than anyone on the "outside" could possibly understand.

[gi]

Gate crasher here!!!

Lou best of luck today hon i really hope and pray you get your little miracle xxxxx

Karen and Tammy, old cycle buddies, it breaks my heart to think of what ye went thro.(and still going thro)n i never realised that the 15th Oct was rememberence day but coincidently i lost my last little baby on 15th Oct last yr if only i knew what lay ahead of me a year later, hopefully this time next year ye will be thinking the same xxx

gi xx

[angelaezra]

Lou - Good luck today with your beta. I keep checking to see if you updated yet!

Angela

[karenthescorpio]

Gi- always nice to hear from an old cycle buddy. I"m happy to see you are still pregnant and cooking that little one! I can't believe some days that I'm still at the IVF thing. I was soooo darn close to being done! UGH. But I am really full of hope and positive feelings about my next cycle. I start Lupron tomorrow...then wait for AF...then start stims on CD3. I know this cycle is going to be it for DH and I! Can't wait to be preggers again! xoxo

Lou- I'm on pins and needles to hear from you today. You are in my thoughts.

xo to everyone!
Karen

[karenthescorpio]

Lauren- sending you a big hug. I know it is so hard and disappointing. Take time to grieve and be sad. We are all here for you. xo
Karen

[lou71]

I'm the saddest girl in the world today. Negative. DH Is sitting there holding his head in his hands. Were devastated and feeling like there's no more hope. We may be done. I dunno. Good luck ladies.

[angelaezra]

Gi- always nice to hear from an old cycle buddy. I"m happy to see you are still pregnant and cooking that little one! I can't believe some days that I'm still at the IVF thing. I was soooo darn close to being done! UGH. But I am really full of hope and positive feelings about my next cycle. I start Lupron tomorrow...then wait for AF...then start stims on CD3. I know this cycle is going to be it for DH and I! Can't wait to be preggers again! xoxo

Lou- I'm on pins and needles to hear from you today. You are in my thoughts.

xo to everyone!
Karen

Karen - Oh I am just thrilled for you that you are starting Lupron tomorrow! It will not be long now until you get that BFP again...

Angela

[moorebaby]

lou- sweetie, i'm so sorry! i can't believe it! this is so unfair! take all the time you need to sort things out. we're here for you. (((HUGS)))

[angelaezra]

Lou - I don’t know what to say but I am so sorry for you and your DH. Please don’t make any decisions now while it is still fresh for you and your hubby. It is probably hard to think straight right now. We are here for you when you need us.

Angela