BFN: A poem

[symmetry]

BFN: a poem

blood and tears begin their flow
together
motherhood denied
delayed? in essence mama I lost you
long ago
I was shouting then
something about zigzag patterns
in the whites of their eyes
shoot! shoot! evoking lonesome
prairie nights on
stunted suburban lawns
but i digress....
where was I? mother
to be, when I was going to be a mother
to you, I hurt
and bleed
and cry
hugging a pillow
daffodils chirping outside
bitter yellow, I think
but everything is bitter
to hear your cry
my miracle
this longing
so full of regret
the doctors in lab coats wish me good luck
as I walk out their door
for the last time, watching the cracks
in the sidewalk
hoping they will break this mother's back.

[debbiefrip]

That is a very pretty poem. I think you very accurately captured the frustration, torment and sadness of what is happening here. I hope that someday you can put a happy ending on that poem and know that it wasn't all for nothing. I have been trying to get pregnant for 10 years and I am still waiting but I never lose hope. Thank you for sharing your poem and a piece of your heart.