Cycling In 2012 Board (formerly Fall/Winter 2011-2012)

Discussion forum for those particularly interested in IVF and embryo transfer including frozen embryo transfer.
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WeHaveHope
Valued Contributor
Posts: 1700
Joined: Thu Feb 24, 2011 3:22 pm
Location: Florida

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by WeHaveHope »

UPDATED 09-27-11 @ 7:09pm EST. Please let me know if I have missed anyone or if I'm missing any updates. Sending you lots of xoxoxo.

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ImageUPDATE NEEDEDImage
Melinda72-ER 9-12-11
Kendra_n_Michael-estimated ER 9-20-11

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WeHaveHope-On Estrogen patches & PIO IM injections for FET 9-30-11
Jen8675309-FET 10-13-11
Becca-FET Fall/2011

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Tamera-11/2011
Kiminsh-Fall/2011
Alwaysangel-Fall/2011
Sunshine1576-Fall/2011
Lyd10-Fall/2011
Anton-Fall/2011
Fruit-Fall/2011
Krrice28-IVF 10/2011
Jasmin-Fall/2011
Cheri76-Fall IVF
LauraN-Nov/2011
Blessed143-Fall/2011
Neffi211-ET scheduled for 10-28-11
Lauren319-Fall/2011
Bebesperanza-Fall/2011
Catdempsey-Fall/2011 ER end of October

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Sky7371-waiting for AF to start BCP for 1st IVF attempt 10-28-11

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Blueeyedreamer-on BCP for cycle 10/2011
Kerpupples-on BCP for cycle Fall/2011
JenMink55-Start BCP on 9-14-11 for Fall IVF
Leorira-On BCP for FET 11/2011.
Rosie84-On BCP for IVF Oct/Nov 2011

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Kamina-ER 9-26-11

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Indigofire-PUPO on 9-16-11. Beta 9-28.
K8ielovett-PUPO 9-19-11. Positive HPT in 9-25 waiting for Beta.
Akdelp-PUPO on 9-22-11 (1 expanded blast good quality). Beta 10-3.
Fvrogers-PUPO on 9-22-11 (2 blasts). Beta 9-30.
Tess69-PUPO on 9-22-11 (2 embies). Beta 10-3.
Tuffy4u-PUPO on 9-24-11 (2 blasts). Beta 10-3.
Toniaa-PUPO on 9-24-11 (2 blasts). Beta 10-6.

RESULTS
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Sunshine and stars-PUPO 9-12-11, BFP 9-21 Beta=75, 9-23 Beta=211

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Last edited by WeHaveHope on Tue Sep 27, 2011 11:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Mrd 11y TTC 8y
Me38 DH49
DS14pr mrg
2 step-ch16&20
IUI 12/10 BFN
IVF 1/11 OHSS
FET 5/11 BFN
FET 7/11 MC
FET 9/11 MC46 XY
FET 12-30-11 BFP 15dpo=266,17dpo=727,22dpo=7125,25dpo=19076,1-20 u/s 2HB's. Our 2 little miracles born on 8-15-12@35w/3d
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catdempsey
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Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2011 9:52 pm

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by catdempsey »

Hello ladies, My name is Catherine and I am new to this form. I have been reading discusses for about a year now and thought I should say hi. So hi. A little about me, my husband and I have one child 12. We have been ttc for 10 years with no luck. I am 31 dh 35 I have one ovary dh has the works going on with him. We did our first cycle of IVF/ICSI in Aug. we had 32 eggs when we went in for ER we lost them all. My RE had taken me off all meds two days before ER because my one little ovary was stressing out. Dh and I were devestated at this here we thought we were on the right road getting to finally have another baby. So here we are getting ready to start again for round 2, I start stim in October and ER at the end of October, with fingers crossed we will win this year. I am still tring to get over the loss of the first cycle, I am hoping that with you ladies knowing what I am going through you can help me to stay strong. :? Thanks for listening Catherine :D
WeHaveHope
Valued Contributor
Posts: 1700
Joined: Thu Feb 24, 2011 3:22 pm
Location: Florida

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by WeHaveHope »

Catdempsey (Catherine)-welcome. So glad you found us. Here you will definantely find lots of support. We have a great group of ladies in this thread. I will add you to the Fall Roll Call located further up on this page so we can all follow your progress and cheer you on your upcoming BFP. I am confident that this board is going to be filled with miracles this Fall. I hope to get to know you better. Wishing you all the best and welcome again.
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Mrd 11y TTC 8y
Me38 DH49
DS14pr mrg
2 step-ch16&20
IUI 12/10 BFN
IVF 1/11 OHSS
FET 5/11 BFN
FET 7/11 MC
FET 9/11 MC46 XY
FET 12-30-11 BFP 15dpo=266,17dpo=727,22dpo=7125,25dpo=19076,1-20 u/s 2HB's. Our 2 little miracles born on 8-15-12@35w/3d
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WeHaveHope
Valued Contributor
Posts: 1700
Joined: Thu Feb 24, 2011 3:22 pm
Location: Florida

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by WeHaveHope »

Dear friends,
I am always searching for words that help make sense of of all that we go through in life. Words of wisdom, inspiration, guidance, and hope. I read these two quotes today and I though I would share with you all. Today I am hopeful for the future and grateful for all of the blessings that have been given to me including all of you wonderful ladies. Sending you all xoxo.

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Mrd 11y TTC 8y
Me38 DH49
DS14pr mrg
2 step-ch16&20
IUI 12/10 BFN
IVF 1/11 OHSS
FET 5/11 BFN
FET 7/11 MC
FET 9/11 MC46 XY
FET 12-30-11 BFP 15dpo=266,17dpo=727,22dpo=7125,25dpo=19076,1-20 u/s 2HB's. Our 2 little miracles born on 8-15-12@35w/3d
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Kamina
Member
Posts: 68
Joined: Mon Jan 24, 2011 11:17 am

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by Kamina »

indigo - what is poasing? How are you holding up?

WeHaveHope - I like that scripture. It think it helped us all.
Do you have a moving cervix. lol. A lizard in the room, WTH. Where is your doctor's office? How did a lizard get in the room. Roach lizard, spider, snake, I would have freaked. That was a funny story. Made my day.

fvrogers- friday is right around the corner. I'm so excited for you. I was speaking to my mom and telling her the same story and she said she could never be so glib about medical situations, especially what I am going through. I told her I could not get through it without a sense of humor. This was a great day. I hope the cramping is a good sign.

becca= 24 fertilized!!! that is great news. 12 frosties fantastic. Yeah, the monetary thing is a downer. I face the same thoughts. I will be working at least 5 more years than I planned.

Lyd10 - been streaming desperate housewives and I think the younger baby is sooo cute but you are right she is so quite. It must be drugs. But the older 3 boys make up for it. I don't even own a TV. Since I have been home I have been catching up on all the sitcoms I have never seen for the past 10 years. They are really pushing the envelope with some of these shows. Im so 'I love Lucy' and square.

leorira - you have been through much at a early age. People just don't understand. As for prayer keep me in your prayers too as I will you. ;) It must be frustrating not knowing the reasons why. Good luck on your job. I'm sure you will taking the office over in no time. lol. I also took a step down during this time. I was a eng mgr. and covered us, Taiwan, and India. Now I do facials 3 days a week. Over qualified but I have inner peace. And know that in my heart I did all I could do to have this baby. I will not have regrets. Once you have the child you can get a stressful job, or not.

Rosie - Here were my outstanding test -
prolactin
thyroid stimulating hormone - failed
rpr/vdrl
Rubella
blood type and RH
HIV
Hepatitis B surface antigen
hepatitis c ab
Methyltera hydrofolate reductate (mthfr) = failed
anti thyroglobulin antibodies and anti microsomal antibodies - failed - hashimoto diease
cystic fibrosis dna analysis carrier screening
hemoglobin electrophoresis and serum ferritin
anti phospholipids antibodies failed blood clotting
nk assay - failed natural killer cells to high - humria but the humria made my number go up so just doing intralipid
th1 th2 intracellular cytokines

All together about 30 blood vials - ugh..... What have they tested you for so far?

Your husband sounds like mine. Always has important dates around my fertility dates. It drives me crazy. He started school for his LLM in NY. But everything worked out. School is out for Rosh Hashanah and it landed on my ER and ET!!! Thank godness for high holidays! I am a member of the Jewish Community Center Gym and I noticed they have apples and honey available. Will you be celebrating? Im Christian so don't know much about the traditions but would like to learn.

fruit - sorry you don't get the anesthesia high..It is probably for the best.

Anton - I just hope I was not talking about flatulence with the staff. I had a weird dream that my friend was an obgyn and she was cutting out endo from my womb. Could it be me remembering the procedure? Scary.
No marketing jobs? Wow I thought with all the hoopla around social media there would be more marketing jobs. Social media does fall under marketing, right? I so want a piece of pie and ice cream right. now... Well it just makes sense when you cant find a job, you make a job. My husband could not find a job at a firm so he opened his own firm. He never regretted it. Ok your post is making me hungry.

catdempsey - welcome - a missed cycle and so many follicles. My heart goes out to you.


AFM - Here are the stats for my eggs

10 eggs
3 - did not mature
3 - still waiting to see if they mature tomorrow
4 - matured (Out of the 4: 1 was not good, 1 questionable, 2 fertilized)
I will know more tomorrow.

If I have 5 fertilized eggs the want me to do pgd- have any of you done this and what do you think? It will be another 5k to do... If I do this will I still have to further genetic testing while the baby is in the womb?

I do my first progesterone shot on wed in the morning. A friend is coming by to do. Help! I thought all the shot were over but I guess not. Every day!@!!!!
TTC 2002
2008 PCOS diag - Rx - Metformin and Femara
Oct 09 1st IUI - preg - misc 8w
2010 - 4 more IUI
QUIT WORK
2011 - april 4 follies iui bfn
2011 - august Humira and intralipid
2011 - Sept oked for first ivf
10/2 3 blast transfered
fvrogers
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Posts: 171
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Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by fvrogers »

WeHaveHope - Your lizard story is just too funny!! I can only imagine you laying there with her freaking out - what was going through your head?! Thanks for the quotes, that is exactly what I needed!!

Becca - That is awesome!! 12 frosties are definitely a promising bunch to work with! Hopefully AF is not too far behind.

Leora - You are so my kinda chic!! Like you, I take prayers in whatever form they come in. I welcome any and all synagogue prayers you send my way! I think the HSGs get easier as time goes by. You kinda know what to expect. Did they do they biopsy as well? That was the worst part for me.

Rosie84 - I understand how stressing it is when nothing is concrete. I pray that everything works out for you to cycle sooner rather than later.

Fruit - Thanks for cheering me on! It means a lot to me. I am starting to get nervous but I just keep praying for faith and positive thoughts.

Toniaa - Congrats on being PUPO!!

Anton - Like you I hope your natural cycle does the trick. I have a really good feeling about it. Sounds like you have a busy week ahead. I hope something pops up in the job department.

Catherine -
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I hope you find the same support that I have found here. It is an awesome group of women. We all understand your struggles on some level. So far we have had a couple of miracles and I pray that there are many more to come!

AFM - Cramping has eased up. Back to work tomorrow. This board is really heating up and I just continue to pray that my BFP is not far behind.
Me - 33
DH - 39


IVF #1 - 2010 - BFN :(
IVF #2 - 7/11- BFN :(
#3 FET - 9/22/11- BFP (God is good)!!! DS Born 5/28/12
#4 FET - 6/17/13
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fvrogers
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Posts: 171
Joined: Fri Jul 29, 2011 10:40 pm

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by fvrogers »

Kamina - POAS - Pee on a stick (LOL) :lol: . In terms of PGD, I do it with all my cycles because my DH and I both carry the sickle cell trait. In my case, I will have to have an amnio or other testing just to ensure my little ones are sickle free. In your case, what is it that they are looking for? I think that will determine if it is worth it. I pray that you get good news tomorrow. The progesterone is not that bad :wink: . If you ice for 15-20 mins before the shot you don't even feel it. I do my own and hardly ever feel a thing.
Me - 33
DH - 39


IVF #1 - 2010 - BFN :(
IVF #2 - 7/11- BFN :(
#3 FET - 9/22/11- BFP (God is good)!!! DS Born 5/28/12
#4 FET - 6/17/13
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Lauren319
Regular
Posts: 342
Joined: Wed Jul 28, 2010 9:28 pm
Location: California

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by Lauren319 »

Leora - I love my iPad! I call it my netflix player. I'm obsessed with watching instant Netflix in bed now. I still can't believe youve had to go through all of this. every time you mention that you've had a c-section it makes me wanna cry for you. You're such a strong girl and I'm so happy to have your support. If you can go through what you have, I can do this. I think it was you who posted regarding your beliefs and other people's postings? I can't tell you how similar we are in that regard. I was raised Jewish but don't really practice at all. I don't pray, but welcome anything anyone will give me. AND just so you know my hebrew name is Aviva Leora :). Congrats on the job!

Anton - I know how you feel about the movies and such, but I have to say it does actually happen in real life. It happened to my sister. She conceived naturally right after trying IVF. She had literally 1 egg. It's funny cause I seriously feel like every woman I pass is fucking pregnant. So for me, movies and tv are nothing compared to walking down the street and seeing how easy it is for people and how much they don't appreciate it. Ummm as for your plans - you sound busy...and a little nuts...in a good way.

Rosie - I hope everything works out with your cycle. You'll get your baby even if it's a month later.

Blueyed- I always bleed. No big deal. You stopped your pills so your body thinks it's your AF.

Wehavehope- WTF was a lizard doing in there? That's insane.

Tonia- congrats! You're pupo! You'll get your bfp soon enough.

Kamina - haha. When I went under two years ago I had the weirdest dream. I woke up and told my DH that he "had to go paint the houses with Papa Smurf" and was serious. Another time the doctor asked me if I wanted something to drink and I asked for a vodka soda. Yep. I'm a little crazy-pants. I have to do PGD because Im a carrier of fragile x, so I know a lot about it. The upside for you would be that you'd be almost positive that the embryos are genetically unaffected, but the process itself might damage an embryo or two. I don't k ow too much aboutnyour story, but it sounds like with the amount of testing you've done ( um 30 vials of blood?!) it would be beneficial.

Catherine - welcome. My last cycle was canceled because I only had a potential of 3 eggs. Belch. It sucks to go through all of this just to have to shut it down. I so get it. It'll be better this time...for both of us. Hang in there, girl.

Fvrogers - have fun at work. So glad you're feeling better!

Afm - still waiting til Sunday for my initial ultrasound.
32, fragile x carrier
DH - 32, 4% morph
#1 - 8/10 - IVF w ICSI & PGD - BFN
#2 - 9/10 - Chem
#3- 9/11 - Cancelled
#4- 10/11 - Batched
#5- 11/11 - Chem
#6 - 5/12 - FET, BFP-474,1081, 3106, 2 hb's!!
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WeHaveHope
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Posts: 1700
Joined: Thu Feb 24, 2011 3:22 pm
Location: Florida

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by WeHaveHope »

Ok, so I'm glad you all found my lizard story funny. To answer some of the questions, my doctors office is in te city. It's a super clean and spotless office so no concerns there. It's been raining alot around here for days so I guess the lizard was seeking some shelter. I don't blame it. I was initially freaking out because my initial thought is always a roach. I promise you that if it would have been a roach you would have read about me in the newspaper or heard about me on the news. I would have run out of that office so quickly. I think it's called streaking!!! I'm grateful though because I really needed to laugh this day. Miments like this convince me that God has a really good sense of humor. I'm glad you all enjoyed the story.
Last edited by WeHaveHope on Wed Sep 28, 2011 2:54 am, edited 1 time in total.
Mrd 11y TTC 8y
Me38 DH49
DS14pr mrg
2 step-ch16&20
IUI 12/10 BFN
IVF 1/11 OHSS
FET 5/11 BFN
FET 7/11 MC
FET 9/11 MC46 XY
FET 12-30-11 BFP 15dpo=266,17dpo=727,22dpo=7125,25dpo=19076,1-20 u/s 2HB's. Our 2 little miracles born on 8-15-12@35w/3d
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akdelp
Regular
Posts: 191
Joined: Sun Feb 06, 2011 4:41 am
Location: IL

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by akdelp »

WE - That is the funniest story I have ever heard!!!! I work at a hospital and I just had to tell some girls...hilarious!!!!

Sorry no more personals right now....a 4 week old kitten decided to show up on my deck and the human society won't take her yet, too young. It is soooo time consuming but just what I needed. :) Did I mention that my dog (who's a rescue) cleaned her completely. She was a mess and Lucy licked and licked for about an hour. She will not leave the poor kitty alone...it's sweet, but exhausting! A small glimpse of motherhood! :)

Anton - I DID POAS - I am nervous to even type what it was...it was a super faint positive. Super faint. I just hope super faint is dark tomorrow or Thursday. I will celebrate when the line is very dominate....and I can confirm it was not a bad test... :) Oh yeah, and I am 5dp5dt...seems to be my lucky day. :)

More later ladies! Kitten (who I call Isabel) is calling! Must be feeding time. :mrgreen:
FET #1, #2 - M/C
FET #3 - @ 7 weeks
FET # 4 - Canceled. Hysoroscopy and DnC
FET# 5 - coming soon! November 2012 or so.
WeHaveHope
Valued Contributor
Posts: 1700
Joined: Thu Feb 24, 2011 3:22 pm
Location: Florida

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by WeHaveHope »

Akdelp-OMG, a faint positive is still a positive. Woohoo!!! I can't wait to hear about the line getting darker. Congrats!!! Please let me know when it's ok to make the notation of your positive HPT on the Roll Call
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Mrd 11y TTC 8y
Me38 DH49
DS14pr mrg
2 step-ch16&20
IUI 12/10 BFN
IVF 1/11 OHSS
FET 5/11 BFN
FET 7/11 MC
FET 9/11 MC46 XY
FET 12-30-11 BFP 15dpo=266,17dpo=727,22dpo=7125,25dpo=19076,1-20 u/s 2HB's. Our 2 little miracles born on 8-15-12@35w/3d
ImageImage
catdempsey
Newbie
Posts: 6
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2011 9:52 pm

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by catdempsey »

Wow thank you ladies for all the warm welcomes. I did go all the way through my treatment all the way up to ER day and that was whem they found the meds killed my little eggs. I wish all of you the best of luck in the up coming month. It was nice to come home from a horrible dy at work to all your wonderful words.
Lauren319
Regular
Posts: 342
Joined: Wed Jul 28, 2010 9:28 pm
Location: California

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by Lauren319 »

Akdelp - woohooooooo
32, fragile x carrier
DH - 32, 4% morph
#1 - 8/10 - IVF w ICSI & PGD - BFN
#2 - 9/10 - Chem
#3- 9/11 - Cancelled
#4- 10/11 - Batched
#5- 11/11 - Chem
#6 - 5/12 - FET, BFP-474,1081, 3106, 2 hb's!!
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Kamina
Member
Posts: 68
Joined: Mon Jan 24, 2011 11:17 am

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by Kamina »

Nothing showed up in our genetic testing!!! We paid 350 and really did not find anything. Lung cancer for my husband's dad. Does it check for downs? They are only recommending if I have 5 good fertilized eggs. I have a feeling it will end up being 2.

Tonight, I'm having cramps, not sure if it is from the surgery or my intestines. Also having more trouble going to the bathroom. I think I will be getting off the Chinese food. Back to water for me. No more Gatorade.

My sister just called me and said my dad is sick in Chicago. From the symptoms I'm thinking colon cancer. I'm so worried right now I can't even think about the ET. Not my poor dad, not now. I was doing so well remaining stress free. Now I am starting to stress. Life is just not fair. I get that but it can be so hard. I will be having many conversations with God. Pray that I stay strong no matter what the news is.
TTC 2002
2008 PCOS diag - Rx - Metformin and Femara
Oct 09 1st IUI - preg - misc 8w
2010 - 4 more IUI
QUIT WORK
2011 - april 4 follies iui bfn
2011 - august Humira and intralipid
2011 - Sept oked for first ivf
10/2 3 blast transfered
leorira11
Valued Contributor
Posts: 1275
Joined: Fri Mar 19, 2010 12:09 pm
Location: Jerusalem, Israel

Re: Fall Cycle 2011 (Sept, Oct, Nov) this cycle is the one!!

Post by leorira11 »

Rosie - going back to North America for a year or two? Wow. That's tough. I have a friend who just left to go back to the USA for an academic year (9-10 months - from Sept to June). They had to find a place to live there, find a job for her (husband is in school), rent out their apartment here, give up their jobs here, leave their car here, go somewhere they don't know anyone -- it's a bit nuts! :D I'm on Meuhedet -- it took us a long time to get from our diagnosis of severe MFI until our first IVF (about 6 months) because they kept adding more and more things we had to do first. I wish there was a list of all the tests you have to do to get approved for IVF. We would do one test, wait 6 weeks for the results and then be told that we had to do another test and wait another 6 weeks for results, etc. We could have overlapped a bunch of the testing. It was super annoying. --- Your husband will be in reserve duty while you are cycling? He should ask his commander about any benefits he can get because you are cycling. My husband was drafted and was in basic training for my first cycle -- he was allowed to come home for the ER and ET. Then, he got assigned a station right near home, because of the treatments.

Fruit - I always copy the entire post before I hit 'submit'. This website has quite a few 'gremlins'! I hear ya on the planning and waiting.... I hope the new RE has some answers.

Toniaa - I'm sorry you didn't get any to freeze - but congrats on transferring 2 great embryos! Good luck!

Anton - Have you tried a recruitment/head-hunter company? That was going to be my next step in my job search. -- Warning about watching Modern Family though -- Mitchell and Cameron are adopting another baby. I hate how they make it sound so easy and quick to just adopt another baby. Ugh. -- Have fun at IKEA. I'm avoiding IKEA at the moment, even though a few friends of mine want to make a trip there. Last time I was there, I was shopping for cribs and baby stuff. I know my friends will want to stop in the kid's section (1 is pregnant and the other has a 1mo daughter) and I can't deal with that right now. We bought 2 little blue cribs there in July on sale... and I had my MIL go to return them in August. :( I can't deal with IKEA right now...

Catherine - welcome! 32 eggs and nothing to transfer??? That is horrible! I'm so sorry! Are you staying with the same RE? Did he explain WTF happened?

Kamina - I think that dealing with IVF is a full time job in and of itself -- anything else I do is just on top of that :D So work needs to be chill. I don't mind busy and deadlines and stress at work --- but I don't have any more emotional effort to invest. So I work hard at work, but I don't have any personal investment in it. That way, it's distracting, but not sucking more of my heart and soul. --- 30 vials of blood? WOW! That's nuts! --- I'm so sorry to hear about your dad....

Felicia - no biopsy yesterday - but I had one on CD10 and I'm having another on Sunday (not becuase they are checking for anything, but because I'm part of a study to test if doing endo biopsies the month before transfer can improve pregnancy rates). Those freaking HURT! --- I wish I could tell you what the cramping meant -- but it could either mean BFP or BFN. 2 more days!

Lauren - we have almost the same name! My hebrew name is Chava Leora :D I was raised really religious (ie, private day school, synagogue every weekend, observing all the holidays, keeping kosher, etc) -- but now I'm not really sure what I feel about religion/God. Today starts Rosh Hashana, but instead of doing festive meals and prayers - we are taking the weekend off to go to the beach. -- yeah, isn't it nuts that I've had a C-section? I always forget that, until I see myself nude in the mirror. I can't believe I have this big ,ugly scar. Ugh. ---- I live in Jerusalem, where pregnant women and strollers with babies are EVERYWHERE. I can't step outside my house without seeing one. I see the ultra-orthodox Meah Shearim women with 10 kids hanging off of a single, crappy stroller and I wonder if this is really God being fair :?

Maria - lizards are great, btw. We have lizards and other creepies here, and I try to invite them into my house. Lizards *eat* mosquitoes and other bugs. I also try to 'cultivate' spiders and their webs to help get rid of bugs. Maybe I'm just weird :D

Akdelp -WOOOOHOOOOOOOOOO! On my last cycle, I got the faintest faintest BFP on 5dp5dt -- and sure enough, I was pregnant! I'm so excited for you! Keep POAS and tell us how it goes! I'm waiting to cycle, so I'm living vicariously through you!

AFM - tonight starts the Jewish New Year. I'm so sick of it. 3 years ago, we were just figuring out that I wasn't ovulating right - but we were confident that I would get pregnant in the upcoming year. Instead, we had a diagnosis of infertility, months of testing and finally our first IVF cycle. 2 years ago, I was 10 weeks pregnant with twins. We were sure that we would finally have the family we wanted and that the year could only be better. But then we lost our twins at 22 weeks, and had 2 failed FETs before finally getting pregnant again. Last year, I was carrying a baby that I knew had already died. I had dealt with losing our twins, failed cycles and now a miscarriage - surely the upcoming year would be better. How could it be worse? But in the past year, we've had another failed cycle and our boys being born so premature and passing away. ****.

I keep thinking - 'well, this upcoming year HAS to be better? How could things get worse?" and then I remember that I've told myself the same exact thing for the last 3 years. I'm terrified how things are going to become worse this year....

Instead of observing the holiday (which would include hours and hours of synagogue time with special prayers to ask forgiveness and for good things in the upcoming year - ugh) -- we are going to stay at a friend's empty apartment on the beach (she is with her parents for the holiday). Now I'm supposed to be packing (but instead, I'm writing to y'all!)

I'll be gone for a few days -- I'll be back Saturday night. Sunday I have another biopsy and I start work!

So much good stuff happening on here in the next few days - I hope I come back to great news!
8 IVF+6 FET=6 BFN+8 BFP =

-b/g twins 22w (12.09)
-mc 10w (9.10)
-Micha (7.19-24.11) & Asaf (7.19-28.11) born at 24w
-mc 5wk (2.12)
-no HB at 18w (10.12)
-BO (4.13)-
-mc 6wk (9.13)

last attempt - donor sperm - baby girl born healthy July 2014
Locked