Cycling In 2012 Board (formerly Fall/Winter 2011-2012)

[Neffi211]

Leora- I am just so angry reading your post! Screw them....who do they think they are? To disqualify a couple due to a very common CONTROLLED medical problem is outrageous. There are teenagers and drug addicts and horrible people that get to have babies everyday! Plus in a foster to adopt program, these babies and kids are taken away for a reason! Come on! It's just so unfair....I am so pissed for you! I would definitely appeal! Your country seems so difficult for things like this....although unlimited IVF sounds like a dream to us paying...but I can understand the incredible need to stop at some point. UGH! I am so sorry! Can you adopt from another country? DH and I would do that next...but its costs so much and we already have 15,000 into a domestic agency with 6 more months on our contract. We are going to do foster to adopt as a last resort. Is surrogacy an option for you?

[amanda1979]

Leora- First off I have to say I love True Blood & Eric or Bill can suck on my neck anytime..LOL With that being said what the hell with the adoption agency?? I just don't understand how the system works at all. I am so sorry you are going through all this. I think we should just start lining people up who come up with these crazy rules and ***** slap them.Can you have a surrogate? or is that not an option?

Neffi- We did a split cycle last time 2 donor eggs & 5 eggs from me. We put 4 embryos in 2 were mine and 2 from the donor. We figured it they took we wouldn't know which one it was & I was good with it. I hope we can find the money to do it again bc it almost worked. I saw you are doing donor so I wanted to share what we came up with.

Ninde- I have never heard of that movie. What is it about? I am always up for a good movie.

Julie- I am praying hard for you. I hope everything turns out good :) Positive vibes your way!!

Kiminsh- Sounds like a wonderful transfer. Just have to buckle in for the dreaded 2ww from hell now..

Sunshine- I am right there with you. I am so sad I don't know what to do. I am never this sad.

blue- I am so sorry. I don't know what else to say but that. I can not imagine what you are going through. You are in my thoughts.


AFM; I am sad, depression, lonely, and feel like I need a new body. A body that will give me a baby & not one that is defective!!! That is about it on my end

[SamanthaRae21]

Well, tomorrow is the BIG day! My first BETA! I broke down and took a HPT on Saturday morning (12dp 5dt) at 4am and it came back negative and I of course was a MESS all day! My RE and nurses told me not to do urine tests because they arent always accruate and will give false negatives and positives. I had bad back aching on Friday though, which is when my AF should have started so I freaked and decided to test. I am happy to report that I did not have any bleeding at at all though since Friday and the cramping has gone away, other than little twinges of pain in my lower stomach.

My nurse said that theres a good chance I just dont have enough HcG in my system yet to register on a HPT and that the blood test is alot more accurate in picking up the extremely low levels of HcG that alot of HPT can not. There is still hope in thier eyes and they told me alot of women will test negative in the beginning and take a while to show + on HPT. That every women develops HcG differently. So my husband and I are praying as always and trying to stay positive!!

Please send extra prayers our way for tomorrow!!

[WeHaveHope]

SamanthaRae-sending lots of positive vibes your way and praying for your BFP tomorrow.

Becca-How are you doing? When is your Beta? Keeping you in my prayers.

Rosie-How are you doing? I know that 2ww is tough. I hope your doing well and I am keeping you in my prayers for a positive Beta.

Blessed-How are you feeling? 2ww waits suck but hang in there. I am praying for your BFP and great Beta numbers.

Ninde-It was so nice speaking with you today. It's amazing how friendships come to be. I look forward to continuing ours

Sunshine-I pray that time heals your wounds. I know that this has to be so hard on you and DH. Please know that I am here for you.

Julia-I am praying for you. How are you feeling? I really hope and pray that this works for you and DH and that you get your BFP tomorrow.

Blue-I am praying for you. I know that these are very difficult times. I pray that you feel better soon and that you are able to find what your next steps will be.

Kiminsh-Congrats again on being PUPO. Sounds like you transfer went very well.

Lyd-Sounds like your getting real close to your date. Hang in there.

Gina-I know that waiting is so so so hard. Its probably one of the harder things about IVF. There is a sense of hurrying up just to wait and then wait some more. Take this time to take good care of yourself. Your time will be here before you know it. I am happy to hear that your grandmother is doing better. One day at a time.

Amanda-How are you feeling? I want you to know that I am praying for your and despite the fact that you feel alone, I want you to know that you are not alone. I am here for you whenever you need someone to talk to. I am praying that time heals you and that soon you will know what is next for you and DH.

Jayne-How are you doing? How is DH doing? This process is so difficult and some of us who have gone through this process several times do indeed feel numb after a while. The feeling of numbness does not diminish the pain we feel. So try to take it easy, grieve all you need to. I pray that you are provided with options to move forward.

Neffi-Thinking of you. I really hope and pray that this time you get your BFP and that beautiful healthy baby that you so desire.

Leora-How awful about the adoption process in your country. Im am so sorry that you are having to go through this. I am hopeful that the letters from your therapist will work You and DH deserve this happiness and I pray that the doors open for you to have the baby of your dreams.

I know that I have left some friends out and I am so sorry. Please forgive me. Please know that you are all in my thoughts and prayers everyday.

AFM-I have my pre-op appointment at my RE's office tomorrow morning. They will do my pre-op lab work and I will sign the consent forms for the hysteroscopy, D&C, and Endometrial Biopsy. I am scheduled for the procedures on Friday at 1pm. I am dreading having to fast until 1pm. It is sure to be a long day. After this I will have blood drawn in the next two weeks so they they can runt he "Repeated Pregnancy Loss Panel". By the end of all this testing, we are hoping to have a better idea of what has caused two back to back MC's. On a happier note, I am excited because I have my appointment with the school advisor tomorrow. I will leave work early to get meet with the advisor and hopefully have enough time to pick the classes that I will begin taking January 4th. BCP's are making me a little crazy but it par for the course. Im used to it. Other things going on, my DS football team won their game Friday night so they will be going to the final tournament game. They are really excited and we are all very happy for them. Work is going to be busy. We have some clinical audits coming up so I will be busy preparing for that. I just received my yearly evaluation and I am happy to report that I received a 5 out of 5 on my evaluation. Yay I am happy for this and also happy for he 4.5% increase in my salary. Every little bit helps.

Sending you all my love, support, and as much PMA as I can muster up to send to all of you. Stay positive!!!

Your friend,

Maria

[Julia73]

Amanda and Gina, thank you both so much for you thoughts and prayers.

Samantha, lots of prayers for you as well! I go in at 8am cst. What time do u go? No idea what time we get the results tho...


Afm, laying in bed, feet up. Checking for blood obsessively dh hasn't given up and I'm afraid to even say it but I kinda have. I just don't sense it. Plus the bleeding is worse. So many people have told me they bled until so many months pregnant etc. it makes me feel better tho. Dh won't even talk about when we can do it again (cycle) and I just like a back up plan. I'm afraid we will be negative and then he will fall apart. I don't ever want to see him cry like that again. It broke my heart and I'm afraid he will hate me if this fails. I know how dumb that sounds and if I look at it honestly, that man loves me beyond reason. Blah! Tomorrow cannot get here soon enough. I notice every little pain. This is bullsh%#!

[blessed143]

Hey Ladies... Iam thinking of you all and pray that you all are having a great day! I am laying around, tomorrow is the big beta day!! Pulling for you Samantha, julia, and I for some odd reason had a brain fart.... uh... If I forgot someone then I am sorry. I am sorta tired. Having crazy hot flashes at night... Weird. I keep praying for good strong numbers!

leora- That is so frustrating. Its not like you are going to go crazy...errr.... I cant believe that. HEre you hear about them giving the kids back after being taken away from a family and then the parents like do horrible things. I cant believe that they would deny you for something that is under control. You would be such good parents. I am so sorry. I hope that the letters would be a big help. I am so sorry. Thinking of you.

Blueeyedreamer- I am so sorry that you had to make that appointment. I am praying for you and I pray that things get easier. I dont mean that in any way other then caring. I am thinking of you! I am so sorry..

Julia- THinking of you. Pulling for strong numbers! I am thinking of you and I cant wait to hear about tomorrow.

Samantha- THinking of you and cant wait to hear the big numbers! Pulling for you!

[Gina1976]

SamanthaRae- Good luck tomorrow!! Prayers are being said! Come on BFP!!


We- Thank you! Every time my mom calls I'm scared to answer! Yep, now is the time to prepare my body and mind. I have lots to do I haven't begun yet so I need to use this time wisely. I got into a huge funk the last couple of months and I think it's over. I'm in the Christmas mood and enjoying things!

[Julia73]

We- thank you for asking. I'm up and down and confused and oh man, a plethora of different emotions and worries. I did post to ghost and he answered so I do feel somewhat better

Blessed- so excited to hear from u tomorrow! Praying for the best beta! Thank you for your prayers.

[Ninde]

Evening ladies:

Blessed: oh that sounds like a tough meal. I really hope that whatevr the outcome that your mum recognizes what an amazing daughter she has in you and supports you. And the very best of luck tomorrow, as im hours ahead in ireland I can start praying earlier for you

Samantharae: good luck with your beta tomorrow

Kiminish: that sounds like a great transfer. Congrats on being pupo and I hope the 2ww flies! We will be here all the way with you x I didnt actually poas so im no good on that im afraid!!

Christy: I laughed when i read your post about messing with my head! I read PS I love you but havnt seen the movi. Great idea though - we could start a book club? Im so sorry its a difficult day. I think you have been amazing how you have gone to work each day. Please tell me you got chocolate?

Leorira: oh my god I cannot believe what has happened. Your depression is controlled and of course your husband has had episodes of depression given your losses. You would both be amazing parents and could give a baby such a wonderful home and they have no right to deny you that. Im sure your therapists will write those letters. Part of me wonders are your civil rights being violated? Im so sorry things are so bad for you. The stress of ivf is horrendous.

Blue: im so sorry you have to schedule the d&c. Are you in pain.

Julia: oh im so sorry this is happening. And it isnt arrogant knowing and wanting everything to work out. Its great you stopped smoking and that will stand to you. Try and stay off coffee and sugar just for today as they will increase your adranaline which will push up your anxiety. Im thinking and praying for you x

Amanda: I usually prefer dark haired men but oh id swap a dark haired man for eric northman!! Im so sorry this is such a sad day for you. I hope you can take the time to rest and grieve

Bodie: how are you?

Maria: that was a great chat and of course you got 5 out of 5 on your eveluation - work wouldnt run without you

Lyd10: how is your head?

Rose: are you doing ok?

Gina: christmas spirit is great. Starting writing my christmas cards tonight

Pinkboots: are you ok?

Jayne and jenmink: how are you doi g?

Btw: who and whzt is ghost?!

Afm: did a bootcamp class this morning and dont expect to be able to walk tomorrow or use my arms!! As a friend of mine said " oh so that's you goi g back to the class then!" - he is right, I will.still no af so all dances appreciated!! I've spent some of the evening turning cupcakes into ladybirds - very therapeutic

Ninde

[Gina1976]

Blessed- Praying for you!!

[Gina1976]

DS got me hooked on the Angry Birds game on FB! Def a stress reliever!

[HopeThisWorksM]

Leora, we are doing a u/s this Thursday. That will only be 24 days after transfer so we are not expecting a heartbeat. Our dr is pretty cautious so now we are done with beta test but doing this early u/s. I'm guessing if all looks well we'll be going back for another u/s in 3 weeks about...
-Hopethisworksm

•Beta Test #1 - 11/1/2011 (8 days after 5d transfer) 4:15 PM- Beta 146
•Beta Test #2 - 11/3/2011 (10 days after 5d transfer) 3 PM- Beta 284 (doubling time = 48.96 Hours)
•Beta Test #3 - 11/8/2011 (15 days after 5d transfer) 6:45 AM - Beta 886 (doubling time = 68.23 Hours)
•Beta Test #4 - 11/10/2011 (17 days after 5d transfer) 6:45 AM - Beta 1653 (doubling time = 51.45 Hours)
•UltraSound #1 - 11/17/2011 (24 days after 5d transfer)



One more note, there are times in this process that you almost feel hopeless, but try & stay positive & keep fighting for what you want. Our second cycle yielded not 1 blast to transfer on day 5! We were heartbroken that we didn't even get a chance to transfer 1 blast after going though all that. That experience has made us more cautious and we are trying to stay calm/level headed the best we can through this process this time, even though there are times of joy, fear and anxiety

[WeHaveHope]

Gina-how funny, I love that game. I also love word with friends. I have it on my iPhone abd even play it with my IVF nurse and the medical assistant. Love it!!!

[Sunshine1576]

Leorira,
I know this journey has been very emotional for you and dh, but you must remind yourself even with the hardships, you have gotten so far. Brace yourself, there is no easy way but I strongly believe if you stay with it, you will be bringing home your rainbow baby in 2012. So please instead of the heartaches, and setbacks you must focus on this, because you owe this to yourself in trying once again. I only want to the best to happen while any doctor would tell you that you have more then ten good childbearing years. I'm not saying you should try for ten years like me, but I am saying you have so much more time on your side. Please be gentle with yourself, I know it's been stressful and it's hard not to become overly obsessed with having a baby. Trust me I can relate to that anxiety and try to think what is my next step if this doesn't happen. We cannot always control the "what ifs", that's what makes this journey so difficult. But we can give this EVERYTHING we've got and absolutely believe we did everything possible, and never regret it later... It will be worthwhile WHEN you are holding that precious baby in your arms...I know because you didn't give up! I would give all ten toes if more of us had unlimited fertility treatment, but more then anything promise me you will take this opportunity and run with it.
"Anything worth having in life is not meant to be easy."

Sending you much Love and Peace,
Christy

[Sunshine1576]

Blessed, Julia and Samantha, I've certainly got you in my prayers tonight. Tomorrow is a very big day!

Ninde, I'm telling you it worked for me and AF came right away...thankfully dh and I have been married for so long otherwise it would of been kind of embarrasing. I don't even like walking around Target with "TAPS".

Maria, yay on the evaluation and raise at work, dh should take you out to celebrate! I hope you find out the results giving you some much needed information explaining what all happened. In the meantime you have alot going on that will certainly help time fly.I hope everything works out with the advisor tomorrow getting you registered to start classes on Jan. 4th. So exciting about your son's wins too. I'm glad you have some good distractions, this will help you in many ways!

AFM: Glad that AF back to normal, she came this time 2 weeks exactly after I took the hcg trigger shot for ovulation and it's not spotty like it had been from the thyroid med, so I have a flull flow in force. lol I cannot believe I'm talking about the this1 My husband only thinks he knows too much already. P.S. TAPS stand for tampons and pads in case any of you missed my last post.