Cycling In 2012 Board (formerly Fall/Winter 2011-2012)

[Gina1976]

I would do it at Christmas. That would be the best Christmas present!

[HopeThisWorksM]

I would do it at Christmas. That would be the best Christmas present!

That's what we're thinking. We'll be almost 12 weeks pregnant at that time so I think we would be more in the clear than now even

[Kiminsh]

Well girls, I just got the dreaded phone call and it's another BFN. I didn't even cry, I told the girl on the phone to have a Happy Thanksgiving and she practically hung up on me. I think I am just numb. My mom is what gets me...she wanted this for me almost as much as I wanted it for myself. When i called her, she could barely speak on the phone:( I guess I will have to start facing the reality that I was not put on this Earth to have children. I have been avoiding facing that as long as possible. I have a huge Italian family, and lots of family get togethers coming up soon. It is going to be really hard. I think the harder thing is that everyone makes small talk around me because they don't know what to say.I generally love Thanksgiving and Christmas, but for the first time ever, my heart is not in it. I wish all of you ladies the best of luck in your journeys, and thank you for always being there when I need you.

Kim

[rosie84]

Kim, I am so, so sorry:( ((((hugs))))) I am thinking of you.

[HopeThisWorksM]

Kim, I am so very sorry to hear this. My thoughts are with you especially around the holidays...

[jayne321]

Good morning~

Kim~I'm so sorry. I totally now how you feel. I also felt numb when I got the phone call. I was so sad with every BFN in the past but I just expect it now. I was actually relieved in a weird way that I could stop the hormones bc I knew it was negative. What is the next step for you?

Hopethisworks~ I think Christmas sounds great but I couldn't wait that long. 12 weeks will definitely be a good milestone if you can wait that long and what a fun present.

Neffi~ Any word from the adoption mom? Just curious... I've been thinking of you.

Leora~ Oh my. I think I see something pink and then I'm not sure if my eyes are playing with me too. Damn line... just get darker. The chia pet Obama thing is hilarious. And yes, I'm not sure if you would give it to supporters or opponents. I'm surrounded by Obama opponents but I personally like him. Although, I think all politicians are disgusting these days.

Rosie~ Great betas. I'm sorry about the headache. No fun. You definitely give me hope to try IVF once more. I'm so happy for you. Counting the days until your U/S.

Maria~ Thinking of you and your family.

Ninde~ LIfe is so unfair sometimes. Some dumb nurse that I was working with yesterday told me that if I rubbed her I would get pregnant bc she is "so fertile". I know she means well but annoying to see pregnant people who don't know how lucky they are.

Bodie~ hey you're moving along. It goes without saying that I'm sure all you care about is healthy babies but do you have a preference on boy/girl, girl/girl or boy/boy? Just curious.

Nac~ what part of California are you from? Nov 29 is around the corner.

Gina~ so sorry for your loss. I'm thinking of you.

Nicole~Thinking of you. Hoping you are feeling better. Has DH told his parents yet? That will not be easy.

Laura~ glad both of your ovaries are responding.

Anton~ It's good to hear from you again. I remember reading your posts during my first IVF cycle and they were always inspriring.

Sunshine~ I with you on the gifts. I prefer to not buy for any adults.

AFM~ I found a girl that I want to use her donor eggs but DH still wants to give it one last shot with us. I really like this girl so I got excited but I guess it's worth it to try one last time. My RE says he'll switch up the meds a bit and try something new. I would love to have a another kid who is genetically me but I am tired of the hormones. The girl I found is only 20. I'm sure her eggs would be great. Her follicular count is 39. Geez... damn young healthy people.

[kerpupples]

Hi ladies! Quick post so not really any personals. Just wanted to give an update on Vegas. It was a really good trip. My mom didn't have any bipolar episodes and she truly enjoyed the shows that we went to. Can you believe that half of the Village People are the original guys? Oh, and the set design and costumes for The Lion King were simply phenomenal. Since our host was a local we did a couple of nontouristy things too - browsed through a fabulous costume shop, had lunch at a very fun and funky gallery and gastropub, and took a tour of zappos.com. I LOVE zappos so that was quite interesting. But holy moly, it's like the TGI Fridays of office environments. People had "flair" hanging everywhere so it was quite a visual assault on the eyes.

Home PC still down so I probably won't catch up again until next week. Happy Thanksgiving to all my fellow Americans here!

Oh, and Rosie - HUGE congrats on that gorgeous second beta!

[bodie1011]

Kim - I'm so sorry to hear your news.

[bodie1011]

Hope - I told my mom at 8.5 weeks after a couple weeks of strong heartbeat on the U/S. I might have waited longer but am really sick and exhausted and with everyone coming to my house for Thanksgiving it probably would have been obvious anyway. Questions would have been asked if anyone saw me gagging over the turkey Now my mom is coming early to help out tomorrow

Jayne - We did PGD due to poor egg quality, so I knew we had two girls and a boy frozen. We chose to put in the "best" two - both girls. So I have 2 girls in there. Thats fine with me, but probably my husband would have liked a boy in there. When will you do your next round? Ahhhh, to have 20 year old ovaries!!

Rosie - Congrats on the wonderful second beta. Wonder if its twins

Neffi - sorry to hear about the Viagra mess. Hopefully it will all be worth it.

[indigofire]

Oh Maria!!

I just went back to figure out what happened. I'm so sorry that you and your family are going through this. Take all of the time you need. Sending you lots of love and hugs.

Kim - OH honey we've all been there. I hate the BFN's and I know how that phone call feels. Even though you're pretty sure it's going to be negative we still hold on to some little shred of hope. What's next for you guys?

Leora, - I'm so bad at those tests. Not sure where the line is supposed to be. When is your beta?

Rosie - GREAT betas!! How are you feeling? Are you celebrating yet? or still holding on for dear life? I"m actually doing a project right now on being pregnant after infertility. I'd love it if you could go to the pregnant after treatment group and post your feelings/thoughts on it for me? And if anyone else out there is pregnant, I'd love your opinions.

For all of our American friends on the board - Happy Thanksgiving. I hate family get togethers when there is a new pregnancy in the family. I too will have to face that at Christmas.

AFM - I had a counselling appointment with my doctor yesterday who is fabulous. I feel I need to come to terms with it not working before I do this cycle. This really is our last chance (well 9 embryos so several FET's), so I want to know that I"m going to be ok if it doesn't work. My doctor did say that maybe my empty womb serves a purpose. I was offended when he first said it, but then it kind of made sense to me in a weird round about way. For those of you who don't know me, I'm in school studying to be a midwife. It is what I am so passionate about. I love helping women transform into mothers. I love guiding them on that journey. I think it may give me more compassion and passion for protecting them. I get to mother the mothers. I'm still mulling it about. Sorry for rambling. He also talked about if I'm sending out this crazy "needy" energy, ie, "I need to be pregnant!", "It HAS to work!", I could be attracting a needy soul into my world. That kind of hit home too. So I'm looking at detaching myself from the outcome, way easier said than done, and be open to whatever happens. Not sure if I'll get to that point. But trying to anyway. Sorry for rambling.

Baby dust to everyone,
Indigo

[Ninde]

Evening ladies

Kim: im so so sorry. That is just awful for you. And i know that no words console. Im thinking about you and also praying that it isnt too hard with all your family around and that your mother finds the words to console you x

Hope: im with gina - christmas would be lovely how are your cytokline levels.

Christy: how much stock did you clear?!

Rose: thanks for that. Im so pleased your beta is so good how are you feeling ?

Leorira: this really is a rollercoaster isnt it? People really dont understand how devestating losing babies is do they? I cant imagine what your experience was like and i think your strength to try again is inspiring

Neffi: are you having any side effects from the viagra?

Jayne: oh I cant believe someone would be that stupid and insensitive to say that - but a nurse is even worse!!

Amy: that sounds like a great trip

Bodie: good call, gagging over the turkey is definately not good for the appetite!!

Indigo: hmm im with you on the mulling. It sounds like your doctor is a deep thinker but im a bit lost on the empty womb comment?

Maria: thinking of you x

Blue: how are you?

I really hope I havnt forgotten anyone?

Afm: had my first personal training session today. Ti be fair he didnt push me too hard but it was thorough. Then I had Accupuncture which I'll do about three times a month until the transfer. Oddest thing though, I am now radiating heat - not burning up and not perspiring - its like its circulating internally. I practise and do reiki and it feels like the strongest experience of that.

Ninde

[Neffi211]

Ninde-- so far, no side effects from the Viagra. I had a headache yesterday, but I think it was just a headache. The estrace makes me feel a little dizzy about an hour after I take it each time, but other than that, I'm good. Just hoping for a good lining report on Monday and no bleeding like last time.

[Gina1976]

Ladies, could have have some more thoughts and prayers? It's DH's Uncle. A little background....he paints cars for a living in DH's Dad's shop. He doesn't use a mask or anything. Paints by hand and not in whatever it's called to make it safer. Well a few months ago he went into the hospital and they thought it was cancer in his lungs. Well he recovered but he was told not to paint for several months. Of course he did any way and now he has lesions on his lungs and he was told if he even gets a COLD it will kill him. He just found out today. They told him to stay indoors as much as possible and away from lots of people. So basically he will have to live the rest of his life inside and I know that won't work for him. He does reenactments with his son is Gettysburg a lot so that's something he isn't supposed to do know. He is only 61.

[WeHaveHope]

Gina-sending you many hugs tonight. You remain in my prayers.

[HopeThisWorksM]

Hope: im with gina - christmas would be lovely how are your cytokline levels.

Ninde, cytokine levels were high. doctor put us on 40mg prednisone a day and is retaking the blood test on tuesday. If the levels drop then we will probably scale back slowly on the prednisone and contoinue to monitor the levels. Everything else looks fine so far thank god.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYBODY!

-HopeThisWorksM