Hi everyone
I'm just about to start my first attempt at IVF. EC date 18th October. I'm so scared!!!!!!
I have been signed off work with stress hrough the anxiety of it all, but am fortunate to get full sick pay. I'm thinknig of asking for vthe whole time off until IVF finished, only i feel a bit guilty, what's everyone's thoughts on this? have you had a sick paper? Never been very good on hormones i have endreometerosis and POCS and have period pain, and it's sod's law that everyone around me seem to be pregnant!!! in work. Keep thining why me. I'm 28, husband is 30 and have been trying for 3 years. Tried Clomid but that still didn't get me ovulating, will I definateley be able to produce eggs.
It'a been so nice to read all the messages and realise that I'm not the only perosn going through this hell!!. Sometimes I feel so self centred and obsessed by it all and feel friends and family don't really understand although they are very supportive.
Wishing all of you all the luck in the world.
Becki
Hello
Becki,
You're right. Nobody understands who has not been through this, though they certainly mean well. One of the best things that happened to me is when I stopped trying to talk to my Mom (who had 8 kids without trying) and started talking to the girls on this list about things.
The board allows me to obsess when I need to without driving DH and all of my friends crazy. As for everyone else being pregnant, I have gotten used to it, almost. When I hear news of another person being pregnant sometimes I burst into tears, but usually I can congratulate them and feel happy for them now - really a miracle!
Wish you luck in your upcoming cycle,
Alicia
You're right. Nobody understands who has not been through this, though they certainly mean well. One of the best things that happened to me is when I stopped trying to talk to my Mom (who had 8 kids without trying) and started talking to the girls on this list about things.
The board allows me to obsess when I need to without driving DH and all of my friends crazy. As for everyone else being pregnant, I have gotten used to it, almost. When I hear news of another person being pregnant sometimes I burst into tears, but usually I can congratulate them and feel happy for them now - really a miracle!
Wish you luck in your upcoming cycle,
Alicia
TTC 2.5 years - Me 38 no tubes; DH 32
1st- IVF June 2004 - early MC
2nd - FET Aug 2004 - Twin boys born April 25, 2005!!!
1st- IVF June 2004 - early MC
2nd - FET Aug 2004 - Twin boys born April 25, 2005!!!
Hi Becki ... I've just seen your post ...
I think you're doing the right thing, taking time out for you, to try to relax and get your stress levels down. Amongst other things, stress activates the adrenal glands, which in turn interfere with hormone production - and can have a profound effect on fertility.... so it's important you feel as calm as possible. Obviously, everyone has some level of anxiety before starting treatment ... you just need to try to make sure yours is as low as it can be.
I think it is the build up to treatment - not really knowing what will happen - that is the worst bit. Once you actually start your cycle - meet the nurses, start your medi, become a permanent fixture at the hospital (!), you will feel much happier about the whole process.
When I started treatment on this second cycle, I started working just mornings (usually work a 8-10 hour day). This was because I was so stressed and tired .... I knew I needed to give my body a rest. This in itself was kinda stressful however, as there was still the same amount of work to be done in half the time !
My stress though was all linked to work, not IVF. Yours is linked to the IVF, so although taking work out of the equation will give you more time to relax etc, it will also give you more time to worry ....
You need to try to use this time constructively and to try to find ways to relax .... exercise, massage, deep breathing, aromatherapy, plenty of sleep ... and make sure you eat sensibly to control your blood sugar.
There are quite a few girls already on the Sep/Oct cycle thread who will be in treatment around the same time of you. Why don't you join that thread ? They're a friendly bunch ! and you'll get lots of support ... and remember Becki, you're not alone with your fears and anxieties.
Good luck and hope you manage to start feeling a little calmer
Sandra x
I think you're doing the right thing, taking time out for you, to try to relax and get your stress levels down. Amongst other things, stress activates the adrenal glands, which in turn interfere with hormone production - and can have a profound effect on fertility.... so it's important you feel as calm as possible. Obviously, everyone has some level of anxiety before starting treatment ... you just need to try to make sure yours is as low as it can be.
I think it is the build up to treatment - not really knowing what will happen - that is the worst bit. Once you actually start your cycle - meet the nurses, start your medi, become a permanent fixture at the hospital (!), you will feel much happier about the whole process.
When I started treatment on this second cycle, I started working just mornings (usually work a 8-10 hour day). This was because I was so stressed and tired .... I knew I needed to give my body a rest. This in itself was kinda stressful however, as there was still the same amount of work to be done in half the time !
My stress though was all linked to work, not IVF. Yours is linked to the IVF, so although taking work out of the equation will give you more time to relax etc, it will also give you more time to worry ....
You need to try to use this time constructively and to try to find ways to relax .... exercise, massage, deep breathing, aromatherapy, plenty of sleep ... and make sure you eat sensibly to control your blood sugar.
There are quite a few girls already on the Sep/Oct cycle thread who will be in treatment around the same time of you. Why don't you join that thread ? They're a friendly bunch ! and you'll get lots of support ... and remember Becki, you're not alone with your fears and anxieties.
Good luck and hope you manage to start feeling a little calmer
Sandra x
Me 41 yrs old - dh 49 yrs old. ttc 110 yrs.
1st cycle (ICSI)....Mar 04 -ve.
2nd cycle (ICSI)....Aug 04 -ve.
3rd cycle FET........May 05 -ve.
4th cycle (ICSI) ... Feb 06 -ve
5th cycle FET ..... Feb/Mar 11
1st cycle (ICSI)....Mar 04 -ve.
2nd cycle (ICSI)....Aug 04 -ve.
3rd cycle FET........May 05 -ve.
4th cycle (ICSI) ... Feb 06 -ve
5th cycle FET ..... Feb/Mar 11
Hi Becki,
I remember being feeling exactly like you do back in March before I started my first IVF in April. Honestly, I was so anxious about the unknowns of everything that I actually did feel better once I got started. I wish I could tell you what to expect with the drugs but everyone seems to have different experiences. I've seen some people just breeze right through it all without any complaints. I did have some side effects that would have made it very difficult for me to deal with work on top of everything else. While downregging, I had terrible headaches and found myself crying quite often for no apparent reason (which is definitely not normal for me). Right before and after EC, I did experience considerable pain and feel uncomfortably bloated. It was certainly something I could tolerate as long as I was at home but I couldn't picture having had to go in to work like that. In addition, I had to go into the clinic at least every other day for bloodwork and scans...sometimes two days in a row. All of this is kind of unpredictable and probaby not so easy to schedule around work. During the 2 week wait to get the results, I don't think I would have been able to focus at work...
Anyway, if you are able to take the time off from work, I would definitely say go ahead and do so and don't let yourself feel guilty about it. It's better to be on the safe side and, since it is something that's concerning you, it will eliminate another potential source of stress.
Staci
I remember being feeling exactly like you do back in March before I started my first IVF in April. Honestly, I was so anxious about the unknowns of everything that I actually did feel better once I got started. I wish I could tell you what to expect with the drugs but everyone seems to have different experiences. I've seen some people just breeze right through it all without any complaints. I did have some side effects that would have made it very difficult for me to deal with work on top of everything else. While downregging, I had terrible headaches and found myself crying quite often for no apparent reason (which is definitely not normal for me). Right before and after EC, I did experience considerable pain and feel uncomfortably bloated. It was certainly something I could tolerate as long as I was at home but I couldn't picture having had to go in to work like that. In addition, I had to go into the clinic at least every other day for bloodwork and scans...sometimes two days in a row. All of this is kind of unpredictable and probaby not so easy to schedule around work. During the 2 week wait to get the results, I don't think I would have been able to focus at work...
Anyway, if you are able to take the time off from work, I would definitely say go ahead and do so and don't let yourself feel guilty about it. It's better to be on the safe side and, since it is something that's concerning you, it will eliminate another potential source of stress.
Staci
Me 35/DH 41
TTC 4 years
Diagnosis: MF infertility
IVF/ICSI April 2004: -tive
FET Aug. 2004 (canceled due to cysts)
FET Jan 2005: -tive
FET Aug. 2005
TTC 4 years
Diagnosis: MF infertility
IVF/ICSI April 2004: -tive
FET Aug. 2004 (canceled due to cysts)
FET Jan 2005: -tive
FET Aug. 2005
Becki, I too am about to start - hopefully October. Am going back next Wed to find out the results of all the many tests we have both had. Sometimes I don't feel normal as so far I don't feel really stressed. For me, I can't imagine being off work - I think it's the only thing that will keep me sane!!! - having said that, I've got a great boss (male) who is happy for me to take as much time off as and when I need it!. If I sat at home, I would have too much time to think and would drive myself mad!!!!
I imagine, from reading this board that it is different for everybody, so you just have to do what you believe is best for you.....the main thing is to get a positive result - good luck.
I imagine, from reading this board that it is different for everybody, so you just have to do what you believe is best for you.....the main thing is to get a positive result - good luck.