Positive and early MC ??

alicia · Post by **alicia** » Thu Aug 12, 2004 2:15 am

Hope,

That's great news that the HCG is doubling - that's the most promising sign! It must be so hard waiting like this and not knowing. I so much hope that all of this will end in something wonderful!

Don't worry yourself about not taking dinner to your neighbor. I don't go to baby showers anymore (or even send a gift, unless it is a very close friend). It's not because I'm bitter. It's because I never know if I will have a bad reaction. I think of it like an allergy

. You wouldn't force cake on a diabetic, would you?

I hope you have some good, wholesome diversions planned for the weekend. No more hot tubs for you! I would see as many movies as possible and maybe visit a garden or acquarium.

Good luck - all of our prayers are with you and DH.

Alicia

Susan L · Post by **Susan L** » Thu Aug 12, 2004 12:23 pm

Hope

i really have everything crossed for you for it to all work out ok stay as positive as you can it looks like it is going the right way with your levels and that its where it should be.

i really no how you feel with the waiting trying to stop your mind going back to the same thoughts its so horrible i wish i could wizzzz the time past for you

good luck for your next scan and BW i will be thinking of you

take care

susan

hope2004 · Post by **hope2004** » Thu Aug 12, 2004 3:37 pm

Thank you all for the positive thoughts! BTW, I asked the doctor about my behavior last weekend, and she said there was nothing that I did that could have caused the embryo to not grow at this point, it's too early, so I feel a little better.
I did some searching on embryo development and it looks like my little dot is way behind. Unless a miracle happens, don't think this is going to progress. Apparently HCG can keep going up even though embryo is not growing.

Barny · Post by **Barny** » Thu Aug 12, 2004 7:57 pm

Hi Hope,

I know what a difficult time this is for you. On my first IVF my HCG started at only 8! I was told then and there that the chances weren't good. I was going for blood tests every other day to see what happened. For the next 10 days or so, it doubled as it should and I was told that it might be a viable pregnancy after all.

Anyway, after more blood tests, examinations, scans etc, it unfortunately turned out to be ectopic and at 7 weeks I had to have a laparoscopy to remove the pregnancy from my tube.

So, I understand a bit about the nightmare you're going through. During the IVF treatment I only ever thought about the consequencecs of a negative or good positive result. I hadn't even considered this inbetween situation. All the uncertainty during this time was worse than the 2ww. My life really did feel in limbo and I just wanted to know one way or the other.

It's really difficult to know what to say to people. My Dad kept asking me "Well are you pregnant or not?" He couldn't get his head around the fact that I was pregnant but that it might not be a viable pregnancy.

I wish I could say something to help you through this. Unfortunately it's just a case of waiting and seeing. At least you know it's not ectopic and that there's something happening in there. Don't give up hope. The doctors never truly know and there's still a chance that it will turn out ok.

Keep us updated and take care.

Barny

alicia · Post by **alicia** » Mon Aug 16, 2004 12:17 am

Hope,

Good luck for your scan tommorrow. I hope the little embie has latched on good and is growing at last. Please do let us know how it goes. We all have everything crossed for you.

Alicia

Mia · Post by **Mia** » Mon Aug 16, 2004 4:13 pm

Hope,
We are all waiting on news from your scan.

Mia

hope2004 · Post by **hope2004** » Mon Aug 16, 2004 6:30 pm

Well, went for the scan and BW today and the bean measures 7mm which 4 more than last time but still behind where it should be at this point. They think they see an egg sac but not sure. HCG is up to 3562. Most people see a heartbeat by now. We go back on Friday and if we don't see something significant then we move on. The IVF nurse was really apologetic this time, she felt bad for me that we just have to wait, but she said that she didn't want to give us any false hope.

Barny, thanks for sharing your story, you're right I'm lucky that it's not ectopic. I know what you mean about your Dad my Mom is having the same problem. I keep having to explain to her that this may not progress. This is day 20 of the roller coaster and it feels like a lifetime. Sorry to sound negative, but I think it's going to be over on Friday.

alicia · Post by **alicia** » Mon Aug 16, 2004 6:50 pm

Hope,

How frustrating that this is happening in this way. I'm so sorry it has dragged on like this. You must be crawling out of your skin. We are all hoping and praying that the news is good on Friday. Either way, I'm sure you'll be relieved to know.

With the HCG going up like that, I'm surprised they would not just want to let it progress on its own. At my clinic, they don't call it quits until the HCG number actually goes down. I hope that you will have the courage to fight for the little embie, but only if you truly think that it's the right thing to do.

Our thoughts and prayers are with you,

Alicia

Paige · Post by **Paige** » Mon Aug 16, 2004 7:44 pm

Hope:

Is it possible the emby implanted later than the clinic expected it to? Unbelievable you have more waiting to do.

Paige

Sand · Post by **Sand** » Mon Aug 16, 2004 8:16 pm

Hope, this is a complete nightmare for you .... I'm sorry you have to wait again. Once again, I've got everything crossed for you

Sandra x

hope2004 · Post by **hope2004** » Tue Aug 17, 2004 1:12 pm

Well as always I do tons of research whenever I need some answers and basically when the embryo is growing a million changes are happening, circulatory system is developing, limb buds, nasal pits etc... some of these changes at 6 1/2 weeks should be visible on the ultrasound and they aren't on mine so that is why I really don't think this is going to be a viable pg. It's basically empty inside. There isn't anything there to fight for. There is a point where HCG stops being an indicator and the development of the embryo tells the story, for example no heart beat.

So, I will deal with the news on Friday, just wish this didn't have to drag out so long. I really fell like I can't take it anymore sometimes. It's a hard feeling to explain, I'm pg and I feel it but I can't be happy or tell anyone about it, it really sucks. On the other hand I know that this happens to a lot of women and I will go on and I believe I will get pg again.

Paige · Post by **Paige** » Tue Aug 17, 2004 2:54 pm

Hope:

I know nothing anyone can say can make you feel better right now. But the bright side is that you were able to get pregnant with an embryo that might not be viable. So your body is ready willing and able to carry a pregnancy. Keep plugging away. Also.....I have been told that sometimes it's a good idea if you have multiple IVF failures, it's a good idea to swtich labs/clinics, as a 1/2 a degree in temp or another drop of a certain solution might be better for your embryos. There is always that clinic in Denver that has over a 60% success rate...it's leading edge in the US and the most successful. My friends went there for their 5th IVF attempt (after 4 failed in Chicago) and came home with her son Trevor in her tummy!

Paige

sfisch · Post by **sfisch** » Tue Aug 17, 2004 3:21 pm

I am at the Denver clinic CCRM, Colorado Center for Reproductive Medicine. They are the best (my fingers and everything else are crossed for my test on Thursday)! I was told unofficially that their first quarter success rate for 2004 was 87%!! I am seeing Dr. Surrey and I love him! He has been great and everyone at the clinic is so friendly.

Paige · Post by **Paige** » Tue Aug 17, 2004 3:31 pm

Shannon:

That is who my friend from Chicago saw for her successful IVF cycle! Her son Trevor is beautiful, good luck! If this cycle hadn't worked for us, we were taking 2 weeks to visit Colorado in October. I found the process very mentally and emotionally draining so why not go where you have the best odds? Provided you can get off work and make it work financially anyway. Good luck!

Paige

Miracle · Post by **Miracle** » Fri Aug 20, 2004 9:52 am

hi,
you don't know me but i have read most of ur updates....i have had my share of painful days too and there r more to come.....my heart goes out to you and i mean it.....i just hope that every good wish on this earth is with you for friday...i will check on ur update so pls let us know as soon as you can....

all the very best....go on embie, u can do it!!!!!

love,
miracle

Positive and early MC ??

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