Am a week into my 2ww and and so miserable I am hoing you can offer me some support. This is my 4th IVF and will be my last, as I have run out of funds. My problem always seems to be the implantation stage and further tests revealed an overactive immune system, which means that I am now having immmunoglobulin therapy, heparin and steroids to try and calm things down. I have managed to convince myself that it hasnt worked and am feeling really low and weepy. I did have really sore boobs but this has now gone, hence my feeling of imminent failure. Im also ffeling really off colour, with nausea, backache and tiredness, but I think this is more down to stress and insomnia than anything else.
I know I sound really negative, I think I am trying to protect myself against disappointment but I could really do with hearing from others in the same boat so I dont feel like I am all alone. I'm doing this on my own, so don't have a partner for support. Sorry to sound off, blame it on all the hormones. Hope to hear from someone soon.
Hi Loobyloo. Firstly, a big Welcome to the site ! You've found us just in time by the sounds of it ..
I'm so sorry you feel so down at the moment Loobyloo. Many of us have been in just the same position, and can really empathise with what you are going through.
The fact is, that you really can not tell whether a cycle has been successful until test day. There have been a number of girls who have had no symptoms whatsoever and have gone on to get BFPs (big fat positives). Equally, there have been those who have symptoms as you're describing, who are also +ve.
You need to be positive 'till the end. I'm sure a good +ve attitude really does help. Lots of PMA !! Tell yourself - This will your last cycle, as this one will work.
I've done 2 cycles, and on both occassions I've felt so, so miserable at the start of the 2nd week. That's when it really gets you.
There are lots of girls here to support you Loobyloo, so you needn't feel alone. When is your test date ?
Sandra x
Me 41 yrs old - dh 49 yrs old. ttc 110 yrs.
1st cycle (ICSI)....Mar 04 -ve.
2nd cycle (ICSI)....Aug 04 -ve.
3rd cycle FET........May 05 -ve.
4th cycle (ICSI) ... Feb 06 -ve
5th cycle FET ..... Feb/Mar 11
ach...doing this alone must be very, very tough. I admire your courage.
If this is your 4th 2ww then you know what a miserable period of time it can be. Full of uncertainty and doubt. Over-analysis of every symptom or non-symptom. I hope the remaining days pass quickly for you.
My only words of hope are that it's very nearly over, and the doubt will be put to rest. I've never had any symptoms during my 4 x 2wws to date. I also worry about the things I can't control so, like you, spend the time in a state of anxiety. If at all possible, think of it as the first weeks of pregnancy and treat yourself like a princess.
When do you test? lf you'd like to head the April testers thread that would be easy to organise!
take care
Debra
ps. we had a poster last year called LoopyLou so don't be surprised if there's a little confusion.
Me: 44, DH: 31
Game Over.
Dates: Aug 02 - May 06
Tries: 5 fresh + 4 frozen.
Results: 1 daughter, 2 m/c, 1 ectopic.
Thanx for your posts, am due to home test on Monday 4 April, my clinic wont do a blood test until a +ve home test. Just reading all the other posts has already made me feel more postive
This is my 4th IVF cycle, testing on 4th April and I have an implantation problem. I too have sore boobs, back ache, bad temper and a feeling of impending doom - they say everyone in the world has a twin!
I have taken the opportunity not too work during this 2ww (supported by my GP) and therefore the only thing left to do is retail theraphy. However, like you my funds are lower than my emotions so it will have to be window shopping.
I try not to be either optimistic/pesamistic but realistic although in no way do I feel pregnant (not that I would know how that feels).
I empathise with you completely, please try not too feel alone and use these boards as much as possible. They make invaluable reading even if you dont post. I find them very comforting, informative, supportive, emotionally sensitive (laugh and cry) and cheap!
Take care and the very best of luck.
Caroline P
Me 50 DH 57 - TTC 10 years
IVF July 04, Sept 04, Dec 04 all -ive
Mar 05 +ive - Amelia Leah born 30/11/05
Loobylou
I really feel for you at the moment I could have written that post 3 years ago.
If it helps at all I have been through 5 cycles and felt the same in all 2ww's ,I also have implantation problems but with the drugs you mentioned I conceived twins! and on the 4th go. You could have knocked me over with a feather when they said I was pg as I didn't' feel' anything.
I have my fingers crossed for you and am sending you lots of pma
I also want to say how brave you are to be doing this alone it is tough even with support so it must be more so for you. All the girls here are brillint and will support you all they can.
Take care
Loobylou - good luck with test, the 2ww is horrendous, no easy answers, but people on here are really good and they certainly helped me through mine.
It's the implantation stage that I have a "problem" with too - can I ask why they decided to do further tests on you as my clinic haven't suggested that for me. Sorry just curious
Anyway, like Little P says (I feel a bit like Nicola, I have seen your name all over the boards today Little P!!!! ) try and keep positive and take it easy
Joanne
x
me 34 - dh 39
ttc 4 yrs
2 ivf -ve
1 ivf Aug 05 +ve, miscarried 5.5 wks
My blood tests tomorrow are to ascertain whether or not I have a high level of Natural Killer Cells - the blood test is called Auto Immune Screening. It is being done in London, but has to be flown to Chicago for the tests to be carried out.
If I do have these cells then it would explain why I had an early m/c and have experienced problems with implantation when supposedly my "embryos" are perfect
The tests are really expensive - about £750.00 but if it resolves the problems then I don't care how much it costs
Caroline - It's good to see you being so strong and positive. You obviously know the score, with this being no 4. You're well over half way there now, so keep up all the PMA.
Sandra x
Me 41 yrs old - dh 49 yrs old. ttc 110 yrs.
1st cycle (ICSI)....Mar 04 -ve.
2nd cycle (ICSI)....Aug 04 -ve.
3rd cycle FET........May 05 -ve.
4th cycle (ICSI) ... Feb 06 -ve
5th cycle FET ..... Feb/Mar 11
Have made it to wednesday without going insane. Yesterday was a real rollercoaster of a day, emotionally up and down like a yo yo. Looking at all your posts, the 4th IVF seems to be lucky!!!!!! Still have sore boobs and backache, no other unwanted symptoms so am practicing the PMA. Am back at work today, so at least have things to keep me busy. Am hoping to persuade my clinic to test me early, as I due to run out of meds so fingers crossed.
Thanks for all your support,it helps to know that there are others in exactly the same waiting game, am keeping my fingers and toes crossed for us all
Everything I do and feel I end up thinking about in terms of the 2ww. Even going for a pee is like an assault course. I'm peeing more often, could be a good sign, could be because I waiting to see if I'm peeing more, could be because I'm anxious or could be ...... then you have the...what am I going to find when I get there..... every twinge, every flutter, every sensation...could it mean this, that?
It's ooo so easy to say try not to dwell on it, PMA etc etc but I feel that each day is lasting a year, even though when I'm tucked up in bed at night I can say that I have got through another day without disappointment.
Oh well, whatever doesn't tip you into madness makes you stronger?
Keep smiling and thanks for listening, roll on day 10 for us both!
) try and keep positive and take it easy
