new &feeling blue

[Lulu]

Hi all, finally registered after wks of trying (dodgy Pc at home!)<br>My story: 37yrs, dh 41yrs with 11yr old from prev.relationship. TTC for 4yrs ,unexplained infertility. concieved last yr but m/c 11wks, Just had 1st attempt at IVF but AF arrived eve before blood test due at end of 2ww(yesterday). feeling low and not sure where to go next. How do you pick yourself up and put yourself through it all again<br><br>Louise

[luce]

Hi Louise<br><br>It looks like we're in the same boat! I have just completed by first cycle of IVF, and my AF arrived the night before the blood test was due. Had test anyway yesterday, just to satisfy the clinic, but I already knew the outcome.<br><br>Spent most of the evening on 23rd and yesterday morning crying or trying to stop myself crying. However, the support you get from the girls on this site is incredible, and you soon realise that you are not alone, and not the only one who has suffered such disappointment. You also realise that there is life after a failed attempt, despite how rubbish you are feeling right now. The happy stories on the boards certainly give me faith and raise my spirits when I'm feeling low. They also help to focus your energy on someone else who may need the support.<br><br>A friend of mine who went through IVF 8 times and never succeeded told me the other day that you pick yourself up and dust yourself off and find the energy to go through it again because of the success stories you hear and because you have to believe that it will happen for you one day. He also accurately described the 'wait' between treatments as living in some parallel universe until the next treatment begins. <br><br>Anyway, welcome to the site. I am sure you will find lots of people here to pick you up when you are down, or just to listen. <br><br>Good advice from my clinic yesterday was to go out and have some fun, to do those things you have given up over the past weeks - alcohol, doing things spontaneously, going out etc - all the things you won't be able to do when you have children!!<br><br>Sorry, probably haven't helped much...just hang in there and you will get through it, we all will!<br><br>Love and hugs<br>Lucy<br>xxx

[Lissa]

Hi there and welcome to the site.<br>I am so sorry to hear that your treatments didn't work I know exactly how you feel. My first cycle of IVF two months ago didn't work either. It is really hard to deal with but as the days go by you will begin to feel better and start looking towards the next cycle. Try to keep busy, I left a month between treatments and am about to start my second attempt (et next Friday). I have just spent the last month trying not to think about it too much and get out and have some fun. <br>I am thinking of you both and everybody else out there doing IVF, try and have a relaxing weekend - big fat glass of wine and a long hot bath might help. <br>Hope I have been of some help... keep your peckers up!<br><br>Lots of love<br>Lissa<br>xxx

[Julie Martin]

Hi Lulu,<br>welcome to the site, i only discovered this site in september after my first ivf cycle failed, sure wish id found it earlier while on the 2ww as ive found it really does do you good to talk.<br>My AF arrived on friday 13th ! sept how unluckly is that ? just 4 days before blood test due to take place. Anyway as they say once you reach the bottom , the only way is back up. <br>Take heart from all the girls who but themselves through this time and time again, i some times read the pregnant after treatment posts and look at the success stories.<br>Im not starting treatment again until after christmas as clinic said i need 3 normal AFs first, plus need to find funds .<br>seems to be a lot of us in same position at moment isnt there ?<br>well take care and think of dh, i think they get a bit left out in all this dont they ?<br><br>Lots of love<br>Julie M XXXXXXXXXXX

[Lulu]

Hi all, many thanks for all your messages-it really does help to talk yo others who are going through the same things. Anyway decided to spoil oursleves and went by train for a day out so that we could both drink vast amounts of alcohol!!!.had a reaaly good day 9although my head doesn't agree today) and talked decided to try again after Xmas,so we may well be cycle buddues julie, depending on dates.<br>good luck Lisaa for next friday and hi Lucy - your cycle must have coincided with mine. My PC keeps disconncting me so not always easy to reply but will try to keep in touch.<br><br>Hugs & kissess<br>louise

[karenkirwan]

Hi Lulu,<br><br>we all know how you are feeling - i felt exactly the same way when I first posted a note & I had given up. Some of the girls were good enough to share their experience with me which made me feel a whole lot better, so much so that I have decided to have another go in the New Year. Take yourself off for a massage and relax and don't forget there is always someone here to talk to if your feelin down.<br><br>Luv Karen X