JEALOUS!!!!!

DEBORAH · Post by **DEBORAH** » Wed Nov 20, 2002 8:15 pm

Hi Girls I have found out today that yet another girl at work is pregnant after only being married for 2 months and has falling no problem (*****) and I feel as though I just need to put my thoughts to you all. Been trying to conceive for 3years and I could honestly say that atleast 10 people from work have all had kids within the last 1&1/2 years, and 4 people who sit close by are heavyly pregnant. I am so so JEALOUS of them all and I just feel so depressed. I want to go to my doctor a get a sicknote just so I don't see pregnant women at work. I avoid talking to these girls as I don't want to know how they are feeling, baby kicking, due dates etc etc. The girls on this website that are pregnant I AM SO HAPPY for cause we deserve to get pregnant, so please don't get the wrong idea about me. I am sure I am not alone in my thoughts. LOVE DEBSx

Michelle · Post by **Michelle** » Wed Nov 20, 2002 9:12 pm

Hi Deborah I completely sympathise and understand - I would/do feel exactly the same as you do regarding pg friends. And you are not a *****! I posted a note recently called 'Pregnant Friends' not sure if you read it or not - but I got wonderful feedback from all the girls on this very subject...and it is definitely worth a read - it really cheered me up, especially realising that I am not alone. Love, Michelle x

suzannemorris · Post by **suzannemorris** » Wed Nov 20, 2002 10:04 pm

Hi Debs You've put down in writing exactly what I was thinking earlier. I feel so jealous and resentful of pregnant friends & collegues, and yet when I'm reading of success stories through this site, I sit there with a goofy grin and say 'Aaaahh' a lot! So you're absolutely not on your own, I don't know about you, but I still want people to have happy and healthy children, but I kind of feel that they should suffer a little of what I and the rest of you girls are going through first.....wicked, wicked me. There I've admitted it. Oh, and don't even get me started on accidental pregnancies!! How the ?#$% do they do that, when we can't manage it on purpose! Any way, we're good people really (aren't we Michelle? bless you, you convinced me that I wasn't a ***** too, when I responded to your pregnant friends thread) , I think it's normal to feel like this, and I'm sure that anyone in our position feels the same way. Take care, Suzanne. is it just me, or does having a baby occupy your mind 24/7?

Andie · Post by **Andie** » Wed Nov 20, 2002 10:23 pm

Hi Deborah I know exactly how you feel, I've been married for 5 years and all I keep getting is 'isn't it time you had children' or 'when are you going to have some kids then'. I just feel like shouting at everyone to mind their own business but I guess they don't know any different. We eventually told dh parents as I'm sure they thought I was the daughter-in-law from hell only concerned about my career and money. They were actually great and very supportive but I think I was right as they did say they thought I wasn't interested - if only they knew! In total, there have been six babies born this year in the family and close friends, it's been so difficult and I just found the easiest way to deal with it was to keep away, kept making up excuses. I've just failed my first IVF (was supposed to have test tomorrow) so am probably feeling a bit more sensitive than usual. Maybe it will be our turn next time - fingers crossed. Take care Andie

DEBORAH · Post by **DEBORAH** » Wed Nov 20, 2002 10:50 pm

Michelle I did read your 'Preg Friends' posting and it is GOOD that we can support each other through our low moments-no sory I will re-phase that minutes, hours, days, months etc etc. Suzanne You are right we do think babies 24/7. You are not wicked, why shouldn't all women have to go through the same upset as ourselves-Life is just not fair. OR even better why can't we just fall pregnant at the drop of a hat-now that would be better. BUT then we wouldn't have getting to know each other on this website. Andie So sorry about your af coming, like me no doubt you will be trying again next year. THANKS GIRLS - tomorrow is another day got to try and look forward and not back!!!! if we can. Love Debsx

Mandy · Post by **Mandy** » Thu Nov 21, 2002 10:06 am

Hi Debs and all you guys, Like u all I feel exactly the same. I swing from being madly jealous to very happy depending on who it is and the circumstances. As u say an IVF pregnancy brings hope and happyness to us all but an unplanned pg, such as my SIL last year sends me green!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know all u guys feel the same and it is so good to be able to let out our true feeling to each other. I am having a really SH@@Y day as I have just been told I have to abandone my FET as there is no ovarian activity, it looks like I don't ovulate!!! why the hell could they have not found this out 4 years ago? I have always had a long cycle 30+ days but have always had a monthly period, they were never heavy or painful which I considered a blessing, but now it seems it is due to a lack of hormones. They have said I can have a FET with down regs and HRT next month when AF arrives but I am wondering if I had been put on HRT years ago whould I have got PG naturally? If anyone has any idear what I am rambling on about, your advice would be most welcome. TTFN Mandy.xxxx

Sarah30 · Post by **Sarah30** » Thu Nov 21, 2002 11:08 am

Hi Ya Mandy I'm really suprised that they didn't find out about your ovulation problems. That was the first thing my gp tested before I was referred to the hospital for further tests. She sent me to the hospital for a blood test three months in a row to see if I was ovulating each month. Didn't your gp/specialist do any tests like that. You must be furious to find out this far down the line! Well I suppose what's done is done and at least you've finally found out. Good luck for next month. (PS, my a/f always used to be between 30 and 35 days (sometimes more)and they found out my ovaries were overproducing hormones but I was still ovulating every month. Sarah

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Loonpants · Post by **Loonpants** » Thu Nov 21, 2002 3:38 pm

Deborah Glad someone has said what most of us feel but are sometimes to worried to say. I also get jealous of PG women. The only ones I am really chuffed to bits for and can talk to are the ones that have got PG on this site as I realise how much they have been through. There is a woman at work who brings her new born in and she must think I'm a right ***** cause I'm the only one who doesn't coo over it but I find it easier to stay away. I feel like a right cow. One mom who comes in doesn't know about the IVF and she asked me to hold her baby a minute well what could I say? Of course I held it and felt my heart ache for something that seems to be out of reach. I'm glad we all have each other otherwise I think I might go mad....aaahhhhhhhh. Lisa(Loonpants)

caz · Post by **caz** » Thu Nov 21, 2002 5:57 pm

hi there - feel a bit like you today. this afternoon some really good friends asked dh if he'd be godfather to their new born. obviously really chuffed in one sense but also feel very jealous. Wish wish wish i was in a position to ask someone to be my childs god parent. We are early on in the process so I think I'll be fine with their baby now- but if in a few years nothings happened for us - not sure I'll make a good godparent - if I find I really dont want to coo over someone elses children! .Never had really jealousy feelings about anything before now - and now I cant help it - horrid isn't it. Its the feeling that all my friends are moving on to the next stage of their lives and I'm sort of being left behind. Its like everyone else has passed this really difficult exam which I haven't got a chance in! Waffling on again - but just to say i SO know how you feel!

fiona_lk · Post by **fiona_lk** » Thu Nov 21, 2002 6:11 pm

Hi Debs and all, All I gotta say is DITTO to all the above. Love you all, as always Fiona xxxxx

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