JUNE/JULY CYCLE

[heather14]

Hi Girls- does anyone else have to test on the same day as me? June 24th? My ET was June 14th. I have felt a little cramping in my ovaries, but not much else. I laid in bed Tues- Fri and half a day yesterday and now just taking it easy. I own my own boutique and plan to work half a day and no lifting. I wonder if I will get my period? My Er was on day 26 and I usually get my period a few days after, it is now day 34. I am watching what I eat and drinking lots of water and no caffeine. I was constipated after Et for four days, but thankfully its over!! Good luck to those on 2ww with me and let me know how you are feeling please. Heather

[pixiesmom]

I had my transfer Fri with 2 (not so good embies) I am not too upset though because it looks like it's probably a sperm/egg problem. I feel better knowing why & I spoke with my Dr about the future expense & he said that they are more concerned with success than money & he is focused on making this work & not the money. If this doesn't work then I will use donor next time. I have been blessed with knowing what my natural child would look like, so I don't have those questions & desires. My only desire now is to have another baby. The Dr gave us a 20-40% chance of embie survival. I am just very relieved that we will be able to keep going & not have to worry about the money. My test date is 6/25. I am wondering how long other Dr's recommend staying in bed. My Dr said just the retreival day.

Best wishes everyone!

[LittleP]

Just a very quick message

TO YOU ALL - take care, look after yourselves and keep full of PMA at all times.

Love and hugs

Little P

[Faith]

Hi Everyone,

Just thought I'd check in to let you know what's happening with me, which is prescisely.....NOTHING!

AF was due this weekend but has not arrived (why oh why is it always the way....?)
I have a few twinges but it's not going to be today, maybe tomorrow. More likely to be Wednesday though, I think.
Feeling pretty cheesed off....and a bit worried.... Last month I was three days early (absolutely unheard of for me) and I thought it was the bromocriptine kicking in. For the last few years my cycle has been getting longer and longer. I used to be 28 days, bang on every month, but gradually that has increased to about 32 days. I figured that my high prolactin level, although not stopping me ovulating completely, was making me ovulate late, therefore making my cycle time longer (does that make sense??) When I was early last month I thought it was the bromocriptine working. Now that I'm late again I'm worried the bromocriptine isn't working as well, which is going to give me crap eggs.... I know I'm probably being paraniod, but it's taken me so long to get this far, I can't believe things still seem to be working against me. I also know that I'm going to have a lot more than this to worry about over the next few weeks. I just want to get started for heaven's sake!

This is also playing havoc with our work / holiday plans.... We have the middle two weeks of July booked off work, and I thought that (if all goes to plan - highly unlikely!) that just over a week of that would be my 2WW. This would give us a nearly a week to come to terms with the result (especially if negative) before going back to work. Now, it looks as though the end of my 2WW would be just as I'd be going back to work. That's not what I want at all.

Sorry for ranting on, I just feel really cheesed off. It's my own fault for being so stupid as to try and put a 'time plan' together for this. I should have known that nothing ever goes to plan.

To cap it all, DH is off to Germany with work today, until Thursday night. If AF DOES arrive tomorrow or Wednesday, he's not going to be here to do the first injection and I'm going to have to do it all on my own....

I know that this is going to sound COMPLETELY PATHETIC but I just don't know today why I'm even bothering with this. I know that's really self-pitying (maybe it's my AF hormones!) but I can't seem to help it. DH says not to worry, everything will happen in it's own time. It's Ok for him, swanning off to Germany for three days. It's not him doing the knicker-checking every half hour, is it?!

Feel better for having got that off my chest.... If I'm like this now, what on earth will I be like when we do actually start!!

Sorry, everyone.... I know there are others out there going through far worse. I just really needed to let off some steam....

Hope everyone else is doing OK (better than me anyway!)

Faith xx

[cmg]

ooh Faith, poor you. The waiting is really tedious, isn't it. I posted something on here last week or the week before when I was in much the same mood as you are now. I was waiting for AF to show up and thought it might be early and then it was a bit late, not that I'm that regular anyway and what does it mean, etc etc. (Answer, it probably doesn't mean anything).

It's so easy to get obsessed with every little detail, every twinge, every day late, day early, spot of blood, bit of bloating, lack of bloating, etc etc. I'm sure it's because this process is so totally out of our control, that we have to look for signs of what's happening. I reckon we'd have as much luck consulting seaweed, tea leaves or chicken entrails, as focusing on every tiny symptom. Won't stop us doing it though, will it?

Bit of a pain about the holiday being at the wrong time now. Any way you can change it? It's still all part of this thing about being out of control, isn't it. It's so tempting to try to plan it all it, but it hardly ever works out like that. DH has all these little notes about possible EC & ET in his filofax which will, no doubt, all get crossed out. I am lucky in that, being freelance, I can just ease back on the work I do and fit the treatment around things. But of course, I earn absolutely no money, which is a bit of a downside.

I'm due for my first scan on Wed, a week after I started stimming. I expect that probably EC will be early next week, but I guess it could be as early as Friday. Trying not to think about it too much as I find it a bit of a scary prospect (never got that far last time).

Hi to everyone else, hope Little P, Steph, Pixiesmom, Leanne, Tina, Heather and any other recent ET girls I've missed are getting plenty of rest and enjoying the sun (though I heard it was raining in London and the tennis was off).

Caroline

[Faith]

Thanks, Caroline!

Thank heavens there are people on here who understand us when we are being completely irrational! You're right, I think it is partly the lack of control and also nerves with just being on the very brink of starting.... It's such a huge thing and there is so much to worry about at each stage before we even think about whether it's worked or not....
With this being my first cycle I just desperately want to get as far as ET.... Just to have a CHANCE that we've never had before.... I'm so worried about the other stuff....Will I produce any eggs, will they be able to collect them (my ovaries are behind my womb) will they fertilise and divide OK...?

As far as our holidays go, we've already moved them once! We were supposed to have the first two weeks of July, then we moved them to the middle two weeks, now it looks like it would be better to have the last two weeks... Work is pretty flexible, it's just that that takes us right into the school holidays and we're supposed to be taking my parent's camper van and going to Devon & Cornwall (and also possibly Bath for a few days!) If we get too far into the school hols, all the campsites will be full! I know it's not a big deal in the grand scheme of things, but it's just something else to go wrong.

Anyway, I've moaned enough for one day! Hopefully I'l be feeling more positive tomorrow....

Good luck with your scan on Wednesday. Hope it goes well.

Faith xx

[cmg]

hi Faith

I'm beginning to realise that one of the reasons for worrying about little things is that most of the time in IVF, nothing is actually happening!. It is such a significant and huge thing to be going through, so it feels like something should actually happen or we should be doing something. In reality, I get up, give myself 2 injections, take a handful of vitamins and get on with my day. I say that I'm "doing" IVF and I've deliberately slowed down on work, but what does that leave me to actually do all day? Web browse, waste time (I'm an expert at that) and worry, which I'm quite good at, too. I think it was almost easier last time when I was at a London clinic where they monitor you a lot and I spent most of my time travelling between London and Bath. At least I was busy! Now I'm just a bit bored, really. Makes me realise that pregnancy (which, let's face it, will be 9 months of this) must be very tedious at times.

Anyhow, tomorrow is another day and another step closer. Hope AF shows up sometime

Caroline

[michelle_in_scotland]

Hi all,
Just a quickie update from me today as i'm absolutely shattered.
My day 10 blood results came back quite low, which they said was to be expected, so we had to go back for more today, i phoned for the results a wee while ago and the surge still hasn't happened so have to go back up on wednesday for yet more bloods, fingers crossed i'll have surged by then and can hopefully have transfer on thursday or friday. I was really hoping transfer would be tomorrow or wednesday because Michael finishes work on tuesday night until the weekend so we were hoping to have a few relaxing days away somewhere, looks like that plan is out the window now.
Good luck and take it easy to everyone who's recently had transfer and good luck to everyone else.
Take care all,
Lotsa love

Michelle
xxxx

[lumi]

Ooh Michelle, I wish I could do a natural FET. I had to wait for day 21 then I have had a month of drugs already and still not near ET!!! I am sure all will work out, fingers crossed for Wednesday!

Pixiesmon, It's lovely to hear you sounding positive. Us IVF girlies just want some answers and info and sound advice and then we feel better.


Faith

I understand your frustration! It is such a worry ing time. For my first time (and only time for EC) I wasnt in touch with the board and would have loved to had advice from here. However, I also didnt worry about egg quality etc. as I had no idea it could be an issue!! I really was that green!! Just concentrate on the day to day stuff and like Caroline says, not much happens most days!

Hi to all - caroline, steph, sand, heather etc. Hope you are all well. If 2ww hope you are resting, and EC girls good luck.


I am having ANOTHER scan tomorrow. I know I wont be ready to transfer yet but I may be ready to double the HRT patches. Lucky me!

I am feeling a bit worried about dates for ET now. They are so far out from what I predicted (usual problem, like Faith etc.) that it may be the last days of school term. Not great. Also, my mother has just booked a major operation for 25th July. I will have to go 250 miles north to look after her andn teh family and the business (man the phones, run the errands). My in laws want to visit us for a month (August). I MAY be pregnant - will have to tell them all when I really wanted to wait till 12 weeks. If I am not pregnant, then its not a problem. I will just feel like sitting in a corner and crying!!!! Not being Florence Nightingale!!! I feel mean saying that, poor Mum.......

oh well, one day at a time..........


Lumi xxxx

[jenniferh]

Hi ladies,
My IVF cycle was cancelled on Saturday due to "low ovarian reserve"-there were only 2 follicles. I am sending ALL of my baby dust that I have and ALL of my PMA to all of you that you have success! Take care ALL of you and know that I am praying for you! We aren't going to go with a donor...too much more money, etc. At least we can feel like we tried and not wonder the rest of our lives if we could have done more. Thanks for all of the sweet words along the way.
Hugs to all of you,
Jen

[cmg]

oh Jen, I'm so sorry to hear that. I don't know if it's worse to stop at this stage or to get as far as ET and then have a BFN. You haven't had to go through the intrusive procedures, so physically at least, you should bounce back quickly once you get all those hormones out of your system.

Like you say, at least you can say you gave it everything you had and now (and I know this is much easier said than done) you can start to move on with your lives and visualise a different future for yourselves. There will always be a loss but there can still be great things in your life and you still have each other.

take care of yourself and thanks for the (second hand!) baby dust - does that still work?!

Caroline

[heather14]

Jen- you will be in my thoughts and prayers and I am sorry that ivf was cancelled. My first ivf was also stopped after Er did not yield any eggs. It was very sad and made me depressed. Acupuncture was my new therapy and I went twice a week. This second round of ivf produced 3 empbyos that hopefully are growing in me now.
Take care of yourself, Heather

[CC]

So sorry for your news Jen - you're very brave to be coping with all that and still posting lovely messages of support for everyone else. I really hope you find some answers - no false hope - I know I couldn't begin to imagine the journey you've been on for 14 years but maybe it's worth pursuing some other opinions? Must be really tough to make the decision you've made and I wouldn't want to interfere but there seems to be many stories of little miracles - I really hope it's not the end of the road for yours. Much love, Cherylx

[jenniferh]

Hey,
Yeah, 2nd hand baby dust works...I do have a 16 year old son! At my clinic, unless you have 4 follicles, they really don't like to go any further. I had had 1 failed clomid challenge test, but passed the second one with flying colors. DH and I have tried to fertilize our own eggs...never know...I know that there are some up there! I figure we have as good a chance on our own right now as any! I know that we could re-finance our home 10 times and be broke on top of babyless in the end. God must have a plan and we are just trying to be excited about learning what that is. I think that it is SO awesome that IVF exists--and ICSI and all of the wonderful scientific advances that WILL make it successful for you all! I want to see LOTS of BFP's!!

[lumi]

Jennifer

You sound like such a strong person - and I agree that everything is written by God - and life works as it is supposed to in the end. That deosnt mean we dont hurt as we come to terms with things or explore IVF etc.

Take care, I am sure your journey has not ended

Lumi xxxxxxxxxx