To make love or not to make love?

charlotte7 · Post by **charlotte7** » Thu Dec 12, 2002 9:53 am

Hi, I'm half way through a course of ICSI - just waiting for those follicles to grow and I was wondering if anyone had come across some research (danish? swedish?) about making love after the eggs have been put back ... something to do with the sperm reacting with the womb lining to create a more welcoming atmo for the little darlings. This seems to contradict advice about lying down and not doing anything for three days?? Any thoughts ?? Charlotte7

Sarah30 · Post by **Sarah30** » Thu Dec 12, 2002 1:02 pm

Hello Charlotte Haven't heard about that myself. I was advised by the clinic to abstain from intercourse fo 48 hours prior to egg collection and during the whole 2ww AND now that I'm pregnant - abtain up until 12 weeks!!! DH is not impressed! Sarah

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Louiseg · Post by **Louiseg** » Thu Dec 12, 2002 1:06 pm

Hi all, I'm new to this group but have already done two unsuccessful IVFs. We're now in the middle of our 2WW for the third! I think it makes sense to make love because that's the way Mother nature works!! so I think a little gentle love should go a long way!!!

maggie · Post by **maggie** » Thu Dec 12, 2002 1:12 pm

Hi Charlotte I have heard about people making love after EC and apparantly has worked for them but I was like Sarah and was advised not to during 2ww so we didn't and we fell pg too. I would suggest that you do what your clinic advises and what you feel most comfortable with. Sarah, Hopefully your DH won't be as hard up as mine was because I had some bleeds from 10 weeks and didn't stop spotting until 16 weeks so we couldn't do anything until after 16 weeks. After all that our babies are doing fine now at 22 weeks. Good luck Charlotte, keeping everything crossed for you. Maggie.

Sarah30 · Post by **Sarah30** » Thu Dec 12, 2002 2:54 pm

Blimey Mags! mine feels truely deprived after just a few weeks, god knows how yours felt! Congrats on your 22 week old twins!! Sarah

charlotte7 · Post by **charlotte7** » Thu Dec 12, 2002 3:38 pm

Thanx Sarah, Maggie and Louise for all your feedback. Still not sure what I will do. Obviously I wasn't thinking of swinging from the chandeliers but it does sort of make sense in a natural way. I guess I would like to feel we had more input than just obediently following doctors orders! I'm feeling rebellious. Ps what's 2WW?

Sarah30 · Post by **Sarah30** » Thu Dec 12, 2002 4:04 pm

Me again Just to answer your question - 2WW is the (dreaded) 2 week wait following embryo transfer. others I've come across on here are DH (darling husband), FET (frozen embryo transfer), EC (egg collection) ET (embryo transfer) - probably loads more too but can't think of any more. Sarah x

maggie · Post by **maggie** » Thu Dec 12, 2002 4:25 pm

Sarah, I can't believe I'm telling you this but I felt more sorry for myself than DH. At least we could relieve him (if you know what I mean... Sorry ladies if thats too much info). We couldn't even do that with me, I wasn't even allowed to have an 'O'. I've got a horrible feeling that we're going to have to stop again at about 28 weeks to reduce the risk of Early Labour. Charlotte Here's a link to the lingo used on these boards. I found it very useful when I started out on these boards. http://infertility.about.com/library/if ... Maggie.

Sarah30 · Post by **Sarah30** » Thu Dec 12, 2002 4:31 pm

haha, makes me laugh how up front people are on here. I think it's cool we can talk so openly. Hopefully at 12 weeks we'll be able to 'go for it' with caution. Am not suffering myself as am too worried to I think. DH gets a bit of relief if I can be bothered (isn't that awful!). Am still really tierd at the mo, going to be at around 7.30-8pm and sleeping right through, plus getting up late - never been so tierd in my life!

Louiseg · Post by **Louiseg** » Thu Dec 12, 2002 6:41 pm

Maggie, Thanks for the link to the lingo site. I was also beginning to wonder what some of them meant. Congratulations on the twins! I hope we come up with a +ve next Thurs(19th) LouiseG

suzannemorris · Post by **suzannemorris** » Thu Dec 12, 2002 6:48 pm

Maggie, We know EXACTLY what you mean!!!! Thanks so much, I really needed that laugh! Suzanne.x

charlotte7 · Post by **charlotte7** » Fri Dec 13, 2002 7:18 am

Sarah 30 and Maggie, Thanks for the tips on the lingo for some reason it took me ages to work out what DH meant .... This message board is great for all of these sorts of questions, n'est-pas? Louiseg keep us informed .....

Alison · Post by **Alison** » Sat Dec 14, 2002 1:20 pm

Sorry to come to this strand late (and thanks for making me giggle!) but I had to add my experience this time round. When we had the e/t I was lying there, legs in the air, and the embryologist was talking to me and d/h. She started to talk about various things I should and shouldn't do in the 2ww (dull things like drugs, and taking it easy) and then looked directly at d/h and said, "and absolutely nothing in the vagina for the next 2 weeks"! It was very funny (but possibly you had to be there!) We obeyed, but it didn't make any difference as it didn't work. The only thing I'd say about abstaining is that if you do abstain and it doesn't work out then you do at least have the small compensation of being able to make love again after its all over. Alison

charlotte7 · Post by **charlotte7** » Mon Dec 16, 2002 6:33 am

Thanks Alison, the image you conjured up made me grin ... though I'm beginning to feel like I should stay in bed for 2 ww. Charlotte7 x

Bex · Post by **Bex** » Tue Dec 17, 2002 9:10 am

Maggie, I like your view on this - i'm more worried about how i'll cope ! ! I was 30 on Friday and i think it's true about reaching peak and all ! ! DH asked at the hospital about making love during the treatment and we were told there was no necessity to stop unless we wanted to ?? After having a miscarriage 4 years ago, i think i'll abstain at least during the 2ww. Good luck to everyone. I'd love to chat with anyone else starting ICSI in Jan. . .

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