Terribly Sad

Michelle · Post by **Michelle** » Tue Dec 31, 2002 12:02 pm

We went for our 2nd scan this morning and there was no heartbeat in the sac and that this pregnancy will not proceed. Although I was half expecting this after our scan last week when they told us to come back in 1 week, it was still a horrible shock. I started crying there and then on the table. The staff couldn't have been nicer or more supportive. DH has been completely lovely and is so upset. I just don't understand why this has happened - it just seems so unfair after going through all the treatment. I guess I have been naive -although I knew that 1 in 5 miscarry it just didn't cross my mind that it would happen to me - how silly can I get? Anyway I am going back to hosp next Wed, 8th and they said if I haven't bled by then I can discuss the option of a D&C. They told me that when having a miscarriage that the bleeding will be heavy and painful - I just really want it to come so that we can move on with things. I'm so sorry to post such horrible news on what should be a happy day - we will be happy to put the past 3 months or so behind us and start again next year. Unfortunately we didn't have any good embroys to freeze so will be starting the whole process all over again. Wishing you all a VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR - and pray that next year will the one! Love Michelle x

alison p · Post by **alison p** » Tue Dec 31, 2002 12:06 pm

Dear Michelle, What terrible news. I'm really, really sorry and can't imagine what you and your husband are going through at the moment. Keep strong and be there for each other during this difficult time, Alison P xx

hayley · Post by **hayley** » Tue Dec 31, 2002 12:20 pm

oh michelle nothing we can say can make you feel any better, but i just want you to know that im thinking of you and dh at the moment and share this wee poem with you (a friend send me this for new year- thought it was lovely!) have faith the more faith you have the more you believe the more goals you set the more you achieve so reach for the stars pick a mountain to climb dare to think big but give yourself time remember no matter how futile things seem with faith, there is NO IMPOSSIBLE DREAM! happy new year , take time to heal lol hayley

fiona_lk · Post by **fiona_lk** » Tue Dec 31, 2002 12:27 pm

Oh Michelle, I was dreading that this is what you would post - I've been checking all morning, hoping and praying it wouldn't be. I'm so sorry, I know words aren't much consolation for you at this time but in one respect I'm glad its new years eve, which means you can go into 2003 with fresh hope and determination (hope that sounds how I intend it). You know I'm here for you when you are ready to talk - please ring whenever you want if it will help. Next time we speak, I'll give you my mobile - it'll make things easier. Don't ever think you are silly - we all go into this with the hope that everything will work out, and for many of us it does - and for the rest, we're just unlucky - THIS TIME. You take care of yourself and your husband - I recommend lots and lots of hugs and add plenty from me in there too. All my love - I'll be thinking of you Fiona xxxxx

suzannemorris · Post by **suzannemorris** » Tue Dec 31, 2002 2:39 pm

Michelle, so very sorry to read your post. There's nothing more I can add really to what the others have said. I'll be thinking of you and your DH at this sad time. Best wishes, Suzanne.x

Loonpants · Post by **Loonpants** » Tue Dec 31, 2002 2:44 pm

Michelle Wanted to send you a really big cyber hug. I'm sorry about your news. Don't forget we are all here for you. Wishing you loads of luck and happiness in 2003. Love Lisa(Loonpants) xxx

Alison · Post by **Alison** » Tue Dec 31, 2002 3:15 pm

Dear Michelle - So sorry to hear about what you're going through. Have started to write about 10 different things but really don't know what to say. Just take care of yourself and do believe that 2003 will be a good year for you. Hayley's poem says it all really. Take care and lost of love Alison x

beck · Post by **beck** » Tue Dec 31, 2002 3:43 pm

ohhh michelle, im so sorry.........nothing i say will help, but i want to add to all the messages and say im/we are all here for you. 2003 will be your year. try and pamper yourself now. beck x

MichelleS · Post by **MichelleS** » Tue Dec 31, 2002 6:09 pm

Michelle, I am so sorry to hear your news. Nothing I can say will make you feel any better at this moment, but I just want you to know that I am thinking of you. Take care, Michelle

heather · Post by **heather** » Wed Jan 01, 2003 11:53 am

Michelle, I am so sorry to hear your news hun. I know there isn't anything i can do or say that will make things any better for you, but i just wanted to let you know that things will eventually start to get better, no matter how hard they may seem at the moment. I'm thinking of you, and sending you lots and lots of love and best wishes. If you ever want to talk about it, you know where i am, hun. Loadsa love, Heather xxx

Louise · Post by **Louise** » Wed Jan 01, 2003 12:31 pm

Dear Michelle I've just read your sad news; I'm so sorry and can't imagine how you must be feeling. Hopefully with time, you will find the strength to start again in the new year. Thinking of you. Louise XXX

Dawn · Post by **Dawn** » Thu Jan 02, 2003 9:32 am

Hi Michelle Sorry this is late as have not logged on for a few days but just wanted to say how sorry I am. I have had a miscarriage in past & felt like I wanted to hide myself away for ever and it does take time to sort your feelings out.There is nothing anyone can say to make you feel better but lots of hugs help ! Well just to say I'm thinking of you & let's hope this is a good year for you & all of us trying. Love Dawnx Hayley- that poem was so sweet.

Lulu · Post by **Lulu** » Thu Jan 02, 2003 9:39 am

Michelle, just read your sad news and like everybody else want to say we are thinking of you. Like Dawn, from personal experience I know how devastated you and your DH must be feeling and please give yourself time to grieve - you need to be totally selfish and deal with it in the way thats right for you and DH- people will understand. We are all here for support if you need it. Thinking of you Louise (lulu)

Savannah · Post by **Savannah** » Thu Jan 02, 2003 12:52 pm

Hi Michelle, Sorry I'm also so late in replying, only logged on today, but I wanted to send my love to you! I am so sorry to hear about your news! I know I have been told before that after a D&C, you are quite likely to fall pregnant again easily. Apparently your tubes are unclogged or something? I'm not sure, I haven't had one! But lets hope it is and you won't have to go for another cycle? Or am I just living in a fantacy world since the new year? Who cares, I want to stay here! Wonderful poem Hayley!!!!!! Take care of yourself and get plenty rest! Savannah

tshepher · Post by **tshepher** » Thu Jan 02, 2003 1:19 pm

Michelle I am so, so sorry to hear your news. I too have been through the pain of mc and know how hard it will be for you in the next few weeks.If you will accept one bit of advice, i'd push to have the D&C, at least then you can move on sooner rather than later. It will be incredibly difficult waiting for nature to take it's course and the healing won't start until you feel that you really have been through the worst. Am sending loads of hugs your way Terri xxxxx

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