Devastated

Tina · Post by **Tina** » Sun Jan 05, 2003 4:42 pm

This has been the worst week of my life, and it's taken me this long to be able to post about it - I don't post very often, but read this site every day. We had our 9 week scan on the 27th Dec and our baby's heart had stopped beating. I had an evacuation two days ago. After 5 years of trying, all I can think is that it is all so unfair. But this was our first time at ICSI, so until now we had just thought we were so lucky. I have seen so many postings about loss on the site in the last few days, and it is so hard - after all the pregancy announcements and joy. I am sorry for you Sarah and Michelle. I hope you are able to get over your loss soon. Love Tina

fi · Post by fi » Sun Jan 05, 2003 4:46 pm

Tina, it goes beyond words as to what you and dh must have been through this week. hang on to hope of the new year and a better future. if you can make it come to chat 6pm tonight, lots of female support. look after yourself, love fi

woppa · Post by **woppa** » Sun Jan 05, 2003 4:48 pm

Tine and DH I am so sorry to hear your news. It is so tragic to think that you have come so far and then have it so cruelly taken away . Give your selves time to greive. I have pasted a poem given to me by the babyloss service at my local hospital. Its really sad but we printed it out and have got it in a frame. Hope you like it. They say there is a reason They say that time will heal But neither time nor reason Will change the way we feel For no-one knows the heartache That lies beneath our smiles No-one knows how many times We have broken down and cried We want to tell you something So there won't be any doubt You're so wonderful to think about But so hard to be without love from woppa xxxxxxx

heather · Post by **heather** » Sun Jan 05, 2003 5:44 pm

Tina, I am so very sorry to hear of your tragic loss. At the moment, words are inadequate, but i just wanted you to know that we are all here for you, and that you are never alone. Take care of you. Heather xxx

Sarah30 · Post by **Sarah30** » Sun Jan 05, 2003 6:02 pm

Hello Tina As you saw, we're going through the same at the moment, I'm sorry that you're going through it too. We're both feeling a bit better about things, my DH has been so supportive and lovely even though he's hurting so badly himself. We're so lucky to have each other. I hope your pain is beginning to ease as mine is. Love Sarah ps - woppa, what a lovely poem - says it all.

Michelle · Post by **Michelle** » Sun Jan 05, 2003 8:42 pm

Dear Tina I am so sorry for your horrible news - as you know we're going through it too. The positive of our heartache (though hard to think in that way) is that at least we can fall pg...and if it we have fallen pg once it is bound to happen again. I'm going back to work tomorrow and in a funny kind of way looking forward to getting back to some normality. Do you have plans to go back to work? I'm going for a scan on Wed and hopefully then they will book me in a for a D&C (I think that is the same as an evacuation). I've no idea what to expect and I just want to do it so that we can start afresh. I'm sending you lots of love and positive thoughts for 2003 - perhaps we will be cycle buddies. Take care of yourself. Love, Michelle x

tshepher · Post by **tshepher** » Mon Jan 06, 2003 8:57 am

Tina It's so awful what you are going through. Can't really add anything else that hasn't been said already but am sending loads of hugs your way. Terri xxxx

alison p · Post by **alison p** » Mon Jan 06, 2003 3:46 pm

Dear Tina, Sarah and Michelle, What's happening to us all? There seems to be so much bad news on this site at the moment. I know that there's not a lot the rest of us can say to make you all feel better at the moment, but time does heal - eventually. Alison P xx

sammy · Post by **sammy** » Mon Jan 06, 2003 4:16 pm

Dear tina,sarah and michelle, I am really sorry for you all. Its not what you probably want to hear,but,i have been there,on my 2nd attempt it all stopped at 8 weeks. Time really is the one great healer,and i found Dh and i are closer for it. A big hug for all of you. love and take care sammyxxxxxxxxxxxxx

RLV · Post by **RLV** » Mon Jan 06, 2003 6:05 pm

Hi Tina So sorry to read your news - I know how you feel as the exact same happened to me 4 months ago after our first ICSI (only it was my 11 week scan). I also had an evacuation. Nothing anyone can say will make you feel better, but in time the pain will ease. Although you feel like your world has ended, believe me, you will find the strength to pick yourself up and try again - we are now on our 2nd ICSI attempt and although I'm terrified of what's ahead, we have got to keep trying. Take time to grieve and better luck next time. Luv Rachel X

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