November Buddies

[eskavon]

Oh dear Chel,
It is absolutely awful when you feel as you do. I can guarantee that every single one of us has been there and can empathise. Its understandbale to feel like quitting your job when your trmt is so much more important but at such an emtional time can I suggest its not the best time to make major decisions. Other than the ones you have to. When I went through my first ivf I said to DH not to let me buy any major items (cars, move house) or do anything drastic. As mad as it sounds none of us will be in best frame of mind.
Is there any way you can take leave or reduce your hours while you have treatment? Or maybe even go on the sick for the period - will a sympathetic doctor sign you off?
Also your hormones, with or without injections, could be all over the place. I do hope you feel better soon and until you do here's a huge just for you.
take care xxx

[wantingababy]

Hi Sam,

We are going through the procedure and hopefully my ET will be in the end of october and my 2ww will be in november. am on lupron and my 3rd day of AF, so start the other shots today. Not too excited about that.

[wantingababy]

Gailp,

Can you pls add me in the November list. My ET should happen sometime on the 26-19 Oct and then my 2 ww starts.

[wantingababy]

Gailp,

Can you pls add me in the November list. My ET should happen sometime on the 26-19 Oct and then my 2 ww starts.

[wantingababy]

Eskavon,

I agree with you. Even I was so stressed at work today, literally walked into my boses office and told him I am ready to leave. With all these medications and anxiety of this working, it is too much at times. And want to be calm at the same time. Not many people understand what we go through including DH.

[lolajones]

Hi Novembies

I've been posting on the Oct buddies as thats when I started deregging. Is it the ultimate message board sin to double buddy? Don't know where I belong.
Anyway, to update the list, I started deregging 5th October

Summary: day 1 woohoo, glad to have finally started! day 2 tired boo, day 4 calm serene woman at the helm of her own destiny - has someone swapped my buserelin for prozac? day 5 1st hot flush day 6 this is easy! day 9 hate the world! Alert all units! We have PMA failure! Please send back up!
Today is day 9.
Scan and bloods on the 20th. Sometimes this seems to be going really fast, others its like the bad slo mo on Wonder Woman when shes doing something, I dunno, wonderous.

Chel - I understand completely. My job also ridiculously busy. Lost it today and walked out a few hours early in a fit of hormone fuelled rage. Can you take some emergency annual leave? Or just get signed off. Dont do anything drastic. Maybe plan some treats for the weekend and relax. We need to be treated! We are going through tough times and we cant be Geoff Capes strong all the time!

Good luck to all November buddies, whatever stage you're at

Love

Lola
XX

[lolajones]

Hi Novembies

I've been posting on the Oct buddies as thats when I started deregging. Is it the ultimate message board sin to double buddy? Don't know where I belong.
Anyway, to update the list, I started deregging 5th October

Summary: day 1 woohoo, glad to have finally started! day 2 tired boo, day 4 calm serene woman at the helm of her own destiny - has someone swapped my buserelin for prozac? day 5 1st hot flush day 6 this is easy! day 9 hate the world! Alert all units! We have PMA failure! Please send back up!
Today is day 9.
Scan and bloods on the 20th. Sometimes this seems to be going really fast, others its like the bad slo mo on Wonder Woman when shes doing something, I dunno, wonderous.

Chel - I understand completely. My job also ridiculously busy. Lost it today and walked out a few hours early in a fit of hormone fuelled rage. Can you take some emergency annual leave? Or just get signed off. Dont do anything drastic. Maybe plan some treats for the weekend and relax. We need to be treated! We are going through tough times and we cant be Geoff Capes strong all the time!

Good luck to all November buddies, whatever stage you're at

Love

Lola
XX

[sammylou]

Hi Everyone!

Welcome Lola - I don't think its a sin to post on more than one board......!! Your downregging report reminds me of what I have to come - last time I was apparently the wife from hell - I felt great!

Chel - I completely understand - sometimes it just gets too much and work just feels like an added frustration.....hold on in there.....the signed off idea sounds better than the quitting one - I have noticed on these boards that quite a few people get signed off when it all gets too much!

Had a bit of a 'disagreement' with DH this evening, well wasn't really a disagreement as there wasn't anything much said......I think I am a bit tetchy with him as his way of dealing with this cycle is to ignore the fact that its happening - I think its because I took it so bad last time when it was negative he subconciously thinks that by not talking about / getting involved it that it might make it less of an issue this time (Mens thought processes - how wrong can they be??? - I guess this is an example of the caveman behaviour from the book 'Men are from Mars....') So anyway, in this vein he proceeded to say he was playing golf on either Monday or Saturday, but if I really wanted him to, he would play on Saturday so I could be accompanied to the hospital for the Prostrap injection!!!! Don't get me wrong, I don't mind going alone, but its the way that it comes across as if he is doing me a favour - HELLO - Who is it that has to get needles in the most uncomfortable and undignified places??? Arghhhhh!!!! Its as if going to the hospital is something I am supposed to enjoy - like shopping!



Anyway the climax of the non arguement was that I stormed off to sulk in a hot bath and he's gone to the pub (which is also really annoying as he is supposed to be off the beer)!!!!

Oh well guess I am being a bit sensitive, but sometimes I do feel like shouting - this is not my hobby!

Sammylou xxx

P.S. To be fair, he was great when it got tough last time and really looked after me (even when I was puking all over the lounge carpet) but he's not so good with sharing emotion...

[Jennyfriend]

Hi Chel - you definitely aren't alone. I have been so positive up until now...Don't do anything drastic while you are hormonal. It sort of goes with the rule of thumb that you shouldn't get a haircut when you are hormonal...which I guess is why my hair is past my shoulders!

It is 5:30pm and I was supposed to get my daily voicemail from the doctors office at 3:00. The nurse said that my estradiaol wasn't where they normally like it to be (128 on cd6)...although the last time I hyperstimulated. I am hoping they are just trying to start me off slow and that it isn't my body simply being steady. I keep telling myself "slow and steady... "

I am with all of you on the job thing. I had a breakfast meeting at 7am - re at 8:30 for bw - 4 appts. after that and didn't get to the office until 4pm. Ugh... At least I am somewhat preoccupied.

[amfy]

Sammy I really sympathise.

My DP is also of the school that we can completely avoid being disappointed if we ignore the whole process. Well - it's a hell of alot easier for US to ignore the whole process when WE are not the one jabbing needles in ourselves everyday, having hot flushes, and generally finding OURSELVES behaving like someone else entirely.
Oh Wait! Thats just ME isn't it?!!!!

I'm also really struggling with work. I'm the manager of a drug treatment service and I get called upon to deal with our more "difficult" or "dissatisfied" customers. Usually I am an excellent communicator and can calm down some of the most angry and distressed people with my warm and sympathetic manner. This week, I have shouted at them, laughed in their faces, and generally just had people storming out of the place never to return. I'm really concerned that I shouldn't be at work, or that I should at least explain to my team what's going on so they stop asking me to speak to people. I've only got enough leave for the EC/ET so what can I do but be a complete headcase for the next month?

Jane - I'm saying a prayer for you tonight, and Katie - still sending you warm positive thoughts (Whilst i slide gently into hysteria myself!)

[Mrs M]

Hello Ladies.

Just want to wish you all the luck in the world with all your treatment and 2ww during Nov, I know exactly what your all going through.

Lots of PMA and BFPs to all.... and most off all loads and loads of baby dust to all.

love Mrs M

[JackieT]

hi everyone
i too start to sniff for my fet in november, the 2nd to be exact. my af arrived today. not usually happy to see it, but.... today i was so pleased.
really pleased to see we have such a lot of ncbs. wishing everyone lots of pma++
love jackie xx

[CARINABOO]

hey there ladies,

Those of you who are talking about how their husbands handle all this, well..... what can I say, whenever I read anything on this forum it is like we are all married to the same guy sometimes! they seem to act so similar. I thought my partner was ignoring everything and sticking his head in the sand because he NEVER mentioned it or contributed to the conversation or talked about it off his own back (even when I tried so hard to not talk about it to see if HE would bring it up?!?!), I couldnt last 2 days!!! I ended up cracking it and he said the below:

"well, you are always so worried about it that it seems like you worry enough for both of us, if you think I am worried too then I feel like I am adding to it and making it even worse for you........ Why would I bring it up when you are able talk about something else for a change? it makes me not want to take your mind back there so you/us get a break from the stress of it"

After this IT ALL MADE SENSE (how he was thinking) I have since reassured him that if he talks about it DOESNT add to my stress, it actaully BRINGS IT down, my anxiety and every thing came down when he said all that because I realised it isnt that he didnt care, just a man who doesnt get it?! since then he realises I talk about it half as much if he contributes because I dont feel so lonely in this and that I have to drum it into him. I have been much calmer since he now gives me a hug and says "how are you feeling today" and I KNOW that he is reffering to the IVF and not just asking for a general update on my life (where I am likely to turn around and say "how the F@#% do you think" because I am annoyed he is off in LA LA land with no problems?!?.)

oh dear, Its all good x

[Mrs B]

I must admit i am very lucky my dh has been great lots of ckisses and cuddles when i need them , just to change the subject im at on my 3rd day of dr and OMG i feel rubbish i don't know if its normal just wondered if anyone else has felt like this. The first few days i was fine but last night i couldn't sleep started hot sweats then i was feezing cold woke up this morning ( not that i got much sleep ) feeling awful all my limbs are aching ive got a headache i feel really sluggish all in all i feel like poo. im starting to worry now because i more or less feel like i have got flu are these normal side effects??

[Chel]

thank you eskavon, lola and sammy for the support. Believe me your words mean a lot to me. I went to work very late today as I slept only 2 hours last night. I told my boss that I am not well and would like to work shorter hours (we work 9 hours a day, almost 6 days a week in singapore). She said she cant help me as my job requires me to be there at least 9 hours. But she said that she will put me on temp resignation until the end of the year. I am sure that she wouldn want a bfp principal who cant carry children in a preschool (if my icsi is +ve). Opps! I better stop here, cos thats my problem I will start imagining all kinds of things and end up stressed (don't worry gals finding a preschool job is not that bad here as the pay is not very high like the other industries).

Eskavon I love the huggin smilies 'so cute....'
lola your summary made me forget my worries and laugh, I think I can laugh at myself in the future whenever I am stressed.
Sammy, I can feel what you are saying, my DH did the same last month when we first decided to go for the tmt. He simply said that he can only go for giving sperm samples as he can't take leave or time off from work (very irritating that all ivf clinics in s'pore gives morning appointments and the waiting time alone will be two hours). I felt like as if I am the only one dying for a baby (he was very supportive during the first cycle). Furthermore, I hated the sight of pregnant women all over the hospital. I will end up crying all the way home alone. after that I spoke to him and he said its not that he doesn't want to accompany but he cant take off. there were times I was very angry with him and we would argue constantly. Now I have come to accept that I have to play the major role (too bad we are the one with the womb).

Take care gals, all the best to all of us
love you all

Feeling much, much better today