Donor Buddies Group

[MichelleM]

Hi Pixiesmom,

Thanks for your reply. Big congrats on your lovely positive! And, good luck tomorrow.

Part of me is positive that it will work, but the more I read online (on forums) the less positive I feel. Not good, but it is still so new to me. I've never been through any IVF as I've known for many years that it wouldn't work for me (since I have poo eggs. )

Michelle

[pixiesmom]

Michelle,
If you know that you have poor quality eggs that's all the more reason to use donor eggs. You have identified the problem unlike us & your answer is right in front of you. You are lucky in this regard. Best of luck!
Pixiesmom

[MichelleM]

Thanks for your positive attitude, Pixiesmom! xxx

[DianeC]

Hi Michelle and Pixiesmom

Michelle, I agree with Pixiesmom, that one important aspect of choosing a donor is that she have a reliable track record - responds well to stimulation and has achieved other pregnancies. I know now, after three attempts, how a donor can vary. For instance, the number and quality of eggs can vary per donor. One aspect, if you were to use a donor that produced a small number of eggs and the quality of those eggs were not the best, is that the likelyhood of you achieving blastocysts for transfer will be slim. Another aspect is if you only retrieve a small number of eggs then it is probable that the embryologist will not attempt to go to blastocyst stage as there could be the risk of losing all embryos leaving you with nothing to transfer. And further, if you have any problems with sperm, fertilisation, division etc. then having a small number of eggs and poor quality of eggs to work with, may be a problem. If you at least have some idea of what the donor has experienced in the past then you can make an informed decision as to the road you are willing to take. I know I would not pay to use an unknown donor, to costly and too stressful.

We decided that age was not on our side, me 41 at the time. The quality of my eggs was not good so after three tries with my own eggs, we decided to go with donor eggs as we felt that this would give us a much better chance to achieve our dreams. At 41 the chances of successs are very low and then on top of that the chances of miscarriage are high - I felt it was all stacked against us. That is not to say some that people are not successful in acheiving a pregnancy over the age of 41 - it is just there is so FEW of them. However, in choosing to go with a donor, our success has not been guaranteed. We feel that we still have a few more tries to go so will persist as long as our mental capacity to deal with the stress does not engulf us and the money does not dry up .

The IVF rollercoaster is such a slippery track, whether you use your own eggs or that of a donor. I think we are all very brave to proceed, whichever way we choose to go.

Good luck to all and keep that sanity.

Di

[DianeC]

Oh so carried away! I meant to add.....

Michelle it is an exciting time and I wish you the best of luck in achieving your dreams. These sites have a wealth of information that can help you gain further information and help you learn to ask the right questions, not to mention the positive posts, success stories and support in general.

Pixiesmom, my thoughts are with you and good luck with your scan .

Di

[MichelleM]

Hi Di, and thanks for your reply. Sorry mine is late.

That is definitely something that will be on our "to ask" list. What the potential donor's history is like. Has she donated before? If so, was it successful.

We're still in the very beginning of this ride and I'm already quite emotional about it! It's a scary thought, but something we're ready for.

Thank you, Di and best of luck to you and your DH.

Michelle

[DianeC]

Hi Michelle

Our experience has been that you end up with a lot of information that really would have been helpful at the BEGINNING of the IVF quest. Alot of our information regarding different IVF aspects, such as medication, age, quality of embryos, receptivity of uterus, statistics and so on, has been obtain via our own research.

There is a lot of information out there, if you seek it. Reading up on the processes etc. will help you formulate questions so that you can obtain the information you need to make informed decisions.


We have been treading the mill for three years now and it is amazing what we know now, than when we started. I know having this information helps me to understand why sometimes things don't work and helps me to move on, but also gives me hope that eventually things may turn out right for us.

Cheers Di

[Smita]

Bumping this up for Ronan's mom...


smita

[NickiMark]

smita, freaky, I was only thinking about this thread this morning thinking I must bring it to life again!!!!

I am a donor Buddie!!!!

Hey where is every one???

[NickiMark]

I guess, coz I am in limbo right now, I dont know what to do, and I guess I haven't been needing a donor buddie to help me on my way, but dont forget girls. It's here to support u donor buddies x x

I m here too, x x

Xxxxxxxx

[Smita]

Nicki,
Thats what we buddies are for.. To support..
I thought Ronans mom who posted on the intro forum would find it helpful, but she doesnt seem to have looked in..

Hows the moving going?Are you packed and stuff- I think I can manage with the packing, its the unpacking that gets me down..

take care all..

smita

[BevT]

Hi Girls,

Hope you don't mind me bumping this topic up to the top, I've been trying to read through all the pages today, and my pc keeps crashing. Each time, I've had to hunt through for it, so I thought I'd be cheeky and push it to the top for easiness.

LOL Bev xxx

[BevT]

Well, I've just finished reading all 14 pages. It has helped me an awful lot to know that there are lots of girls going for donor eggs or sperm.

Nicki, how are you doing at the moment. I have seen you posting on other topics, I think on the over 40 crowd. Am I right? Are you still waiting to make a decision as to where you go from here.

I'm still waiting to pin DH down to either go to IM or ISIDA for donor eggs. Shame my husband doesn't have blue eyes, otherwise we could have shared your eggs and his sperm

Anymore donor buddies out there?

LOL Bev xxx

[NickiMark]

We are in between tmt, dont if to do ivf or iui?? will still need donor sperm whatever!!!

Sorry, dont post on over 40's thread!!! Only 30!!!

But generally post everywhere else!!!!
Good with your DE's xx

[BevT]

Sorry Nicki,

Yes, I see now from your signature that you are only 30!! Lucky you. I do apologise, I must have seen you posting everywhere else, and because I spend most of my time with the more "mature" girls, just assumed that's where I'd seen you.

Your indecision about IUI or IVF is a hard one. One of my cycles converted to IUI because of poor ovarian response, and I was convinced it would work. After all, when you here about girls getting pregnant by mistake, cos it only takes one little sperm, you think that all those millions floating about in there, one is bound to get through. The only thing with IVF is that although it is much more invasive, ie stimming and collection then transfer, at least you know that the little cherubs have fertilized, started to divide etc etc before they go back in. And of course, if you produce enough eggs, you can always have some frosties for another go later on. Only you and DH can make such huge decisions, it depends on whether you think you have a better chance with IVF or not. After 3 IUI's I personally would want to try the next stage - but as I said, only you can decide.

What does DH think?

LOL Bev xxx