weather in Kiev jolly chilly...but we have 10 days so looking forward to the break.Deb - great to hear from you, mega hugs, glad to hear you are planning and enjoying dh and dd as you wanted to enjoy them, {{{{{{
}}}}}}Lara - any time you need help just let me know - also email OK??? It's hard to know what to do, but your heart will tell you what's most important.
Amfy-Good luck on your 2ww, and make sure you move around a lot at work - need to keep the old blood flowing you know
Randa - oh pooh hello af - well miracles can't happen every day can they?? although you deserve one. We should invent a waiting to cycle Advent Calendar ----and a 2ww advent calendar... now there's a business idea
I might just get my artistic brain round that on my 2ww jen - keep up the PMA sweetie and don't let them waer you down. You need mega strop ammunition you call me and we'll send the boyz round
actually amfy (+lara), something like that worked for us, although I didn't do it formally..here's how it went :
After the m/c I didn't want to wait 3 months - was told any way by Spanish clinic couln't treat my for 4 months cos of Summer hols sooooo that made me decide to research Kiev as an option as there we could afford more goes and their succes rates (LBR) were just as good as Spain. They also said wait 3 months soooooo I decided to use the time constructively:
1. we had m/c so I said no more tries until all possibilities tested
2. Hashimoto's immune thyroiditis diagnosed me- linked to m/c and NK cells so needed tmt took 3months to diagnose and stabilise anyway
3. Dh sperm tested by sperm guru as we had v.low fertilisation rates even with young egg donor - found <2% normal sperm aaaaaaggggghhh
4. Were recommended TESE so we went for it had TESE here in Germany and same rigourous guru tests - sperm normal (cost us €1500 but I decided it was worth it)
So, I said, then we will:
1. Use TESE samples
2. Do PGScreening
3. Do major Immune monitoring / tmt
well, Kiev said, with normal TESE why did we want to do PGS since the donor is 23 and healthy, it would have cost $1000, AND meant freezing the embryos while waiting for the results
risk of thaw failure etc ummmmmmm. So I thought bugger that we'll go back to Spain thenmaybe they will be prepared to do it. Then I thought yeh but then we can only afford 2 goes, wheras with Kiev we can do 5 goes if we want....so Kiev won in the end without PGS. OK it's easier for us as our donor is young but maybe that helps??Immune stuff - well now the Hashi do dooos is being treated with thryroid hormone, there is a good chance that I'll be Ok just a slight risk of immune issues (NK cells etc). Our Germany Uni clinic said Nk cells <29% is fine (I am 15%) and Prof Beer says 15% is the danger zone...again we decided to be practical - we are going to get one screen done if I make it to 6 weeks and take it from there. Otherwise I would have been flying in meds from the UK / States and getting my gynae to treat me wihout proper monitoring. At some point you do have to trust to luck, God and fate and just jump in.
I don't know if that helps, but I thought perhaps as our siutuation is so complex, the way we tried to simplify things and take it a step at a time might be of use. I too am absolutely terrifies of another m/c. I am sure it will feel like a time bomb if I do get pg, but I am going to try and take it on day at a time... and get counselling to boot
Oh - another thought - I know at least 2 women who decided to go for donor eggs to increase the chance of succeeding (I didn't have choice, mine are no more as they say), again, priority for them was pg and baby rather than necessarily own genes - very hard decision to make - very hard, but it does have it's advantages.
oh blimey I do ramble - sorry if I've been too opinionated, it is just my thoughts on the subject, hope it helps.
Love and hugs to all of us wonderful wise womb women
bigJ
Hi all,
.Emotionally i have been like a prized doberman crossed with a tazmanian she-devil, snapping everyones heads off and spawing myself 
. I keep apologising to DF then putting his back up again by saying something provoking. Where does it all come from?