Good Bye and Good Luck

Paula · Post by **Paula** » Fri Nov 25, 2005 2:17 am

Hello Everyone,

I know i haven't been online here in awhile but i've been suffering from some depression. I had all my tests come back from my last round of blood tests and they weren't good. My doctor doesn't see me ever being able to be successful with ivf due to my blood tests and so on.

It's been almost a 2 1/2 year fight now. 1 1/2 years of not knowing, just trying and being disappointed month after month, a million pregnancy tests later, and then a year of hospitals, clinics, dr's, tests, injections, disappointment, guilt, tears and so on and so on. 2 1/2 years of my life has been fixated on this dream, and for my own state of mind i need to let it go.

I am now accepting that my dh and myself will never have a baby and I now need to go on and see what else life has to offer.

So in saying that I just thought I needed to come here and say goodbye rather than just disappearing.

Thank you to all the girls i've met in here who've cheered me on, who've listened to my fears, my sadness and who've tried to help dry my tears. I appreciate each and everyone of you and I thank you all for being here for me.

I'd also like to wish you all the best of luck in your quest for your dreams. May all your hopes and wishes come true.

Oceans of babydust to you all.... xoxoxox

Love Paula
xoxox

ogr1 · Post by **ogr1** » Fri Nov 25, 2005 5:19 am

thanking you for letting us know. it is not a easy thing to deal with.
have you thought of adoption?

know that if you ever need a friend just let us know..
i to most likely will never be pregnant again ..
i wonder sometimes if i do more harm then good by comming on the board.

i hope that you find some peace..

bella-s · Post by **bella-s** » Fri Nov 25, 2005 5:59 am

Paula,

As a relaitively new member to the site, I have not met you before, but my heart goes out to you. I hope that you find happiness and wish you all the best with whatever path you take in the future.

Bella.

sue e · Post by **sue e** » Fri Nov 25, 2005 8:01 am

Paula,

what can i say, I am absolutely gutted for you but i do understand you have to draw the line somewhere for your own sanity. I have enjoyed getting to know you and i will miss you. i trully wish you all the best for the future

Love and hugs

sue xxx

ps. if your email address is still in my inbox (deleted a few messages and forgot it was in there) Will send you the odd email to check were you are up to, if thats ok?

LittleP · Post by **LittleP** » Fri Nov 25, 2005 8:13 am

Paula

Good bye and good luck with everything you do in the future.

We'll all miss you here, but totally understand your need to remove yourself from this.

Take care

Little P

Paula · Post by **Paula** » Fri Nov 25, 2005 8:14 am

Hi Girls,

Thanks so much for your thoughts and wishes. Ogr, not sure about adoption, its something we have talked about in the past but its something I can't really think of right now. I'm sure you understand, it's just to hard right now, but thanks for your concern.

Bella, I haven't met you yet either but thank you..

Sue, little susie, awww yes, please do email me. I'd love to hear from you and you need to keep me posted on how your doing.

huggs girls
xox
Paula

DebraP · Post by **DebraP** » Fri Nov 25, 2005 9:31 am

Paula, I wish you the very best of luck in the future. Letting go of the babydream is extremely difficult but you're so right with how exhausting it all is. Life is too short to spend it wishing for something else.

hugs
Debra.

BelB · Post by **BelB** » Fri Nov 25, 2005 10:42 am

Hey Paula,
Kinda thought you were thinking things through...I can understand where you're at. Wishing you and your fabulous hubby all the best for a fabulous, restful Christmas.
Take care
Belinda

MLG · Post by **MLG** » Fri Nov 25, 2005 12:31 pm

Best of luck with wherever your life takes you

xxxxx
Keep the PMA

Jeni Babes · Post by **Jeni Babes** » Fri Nov 25, 2005 4:24 pm

Paula

What a stressful 2 1/2yrs you've had ( and the rest).
There is so much depression and grief attached to the whole ivf process never mind trying for a baby. With all these emotions flying around it is no wonder many of us end up depressed. You Honey, have gone through a lot more than many of us....It sounds like your body and mind need a rest. My thoughts and love are with you and yours. I hope your depression clears quickly and you can get to enjoy your life with DH again.

Thank you for all your support and input you have given me in the past. we will miss you...

LOVING hugs
jenxxxx

Sand · Post by **Sand** » Fri Nov 25, 2005 9:19 pm

Hi Paula

As I said to someone else the other day, when the time comes, it comes and you just know it's right however hard it is.

Lots of luck and love in your future life. I'm hpe all all works out for you both. I'm sure you'll find something to fill the void, although it won't be evident at the moment.

Lots of love and hugs ..

Sandra x

Smita · Post by **Smita** » Sat Nov 26, 2005 4:43 am

Paula,
All I can do is send you a BIIG HUG and hope you can take life by its horns soon again.
Lots of love, luck and laughter always,

smita

NickiMark · Post by **NickiMark** » Sat Nov 26, 2005 7:34 am

paula, thanks for letting us know. but u do what u have to, Good Luck with whatever life throws at you now.

Keep smiling! xx

pauline69 · Post by **pauline69** » Wed Nov 30, 2005 4:55 pm

Dear Paula

So sorry to read that your dream is over. Getting on the roller-coaster is hard but knowing you need to get off and then doing so is even harder.

I hope you feel better soon & that you and DH are able to move on and enjoy your life together.

Wishing you both all the very best.

Best Wishes, Pauline x

Molly B · Post by **Molly B** » Thu Dec 01, 2005 10:12 am

Paula.
I'm so very sorry for all that you have been through but I wish you and your DH all the best for whatever life brings. Take Care.
Molly B

Good Bye and Good Luck

Good Bye and Good Luck

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