NEW YEAR buddies!

[Leanne]

Hi girls

Souris, thanks for the warm welcome back. I did write quite a bit about my feelings about egg sharing on one of the egg sharing links if you want to find it ? It is hard to cope emotionally, we said at the time we didn't want to know the other results and then when we ready ( about 5 months later) we asked and were able to cope better. I am not gutted about their result, I am thrilled for them, its a really strange situation that I find hard to explain. Some of my emotions and tears are because I'm proud of what I have done and some because I feel a bit sorry for myself. I just have to keep reminding myself how we all got this far and how helping each other is the way forward. If you want any advice on it feel free to P.M.

Lynee, firstly, egg sharing is when I give half my eggs to another lady ( whom I will never know) and the cost of treatment is greatly reduced. It can also mean being treated quicker because of the shortage. On a non selfish thought, it helps a couple with their only chance of pregnancy, for example the lady may have had cancer or been through an early meno pause or lots of other medical factors. There is a lot to consider, we had to have counselling because the child is legally allowed to come and find me but I can't find them, but if I have a baby, my baby is legally allowed to go and find their sibling. Also loads of blood tests etc. Not all hospitals do it and some are very choosey ( rightly so).

About the drinking. When we did our first fresh cycle the it was around Christmas and I was due transfer Jan. The nurse said to me that a few drinks won't harm me and if it helped stop people questioning why I wasn't drinking it could infact help me, just don't go mad. This time, new hospital, ( due to start treatment Jan) the nurse said it wasn't so bad for me to drink because the body repairs itself monthly ( the cycle - A.F ) but it is vital my DH doesn't go mad because his sperm takes a couple of months to repair - recycle. I know all hospitals give different advice but I hope it helps. I plan to drink and have a good time, I have had the last few Christmas' without really.

Hi to all the other girls - enjoy the festive season and hopefully we will all get our special christmas presents in the new year ! Leanne

[heather]

Hi Leanne,

I've just had the first lot of blood tests done to become an egg sharer. We're the donor, and have a matching appointment the 6th dec. Hopefully going to start tx jan/feb time. Am sooo impatient though - want to start asap!!!

[em]

Hi Lynne
Just wanted to put my word in about drinking over the festive period, i too will be set for my second IVF/ICSI in January so it is great to see this link - i have been off line for a while because i knew i wanted to leave it for 3 months before trying again, and tried for my sanity and my partner's sake to try and focus on other things (yeah right!). I also think it is wise as others have said not to go through a cycle at xmas.
To be honest, i would say that from what i have been told, and what i have read during books in the health store near me that in fact caffeine is the biggest no no, as it not only dehydrates you (after you have struggled with the advised 2 litres a day) but whether you are aware of it or not, speeds up your system which should be relaxing. It also stops you being able to absorb iron (essential for conception) and depletes the body of other essential vitamins and minerals. I have been told that the odd glass of red wine is good news as it thickens the lining of the uterus, and is generally warming, and not too acidic unlike champagne and white wine. Try and cut out coffee altogether.
Are any of you following any special diet? I would be interested to know...
Great to have this support, thank you very much for setting it up. x

[souris]

Hi Em,

welcome back! Sorry, i did not realise that you was not around anymore... Totally understand that you needed a break from it all... I stopped posting after my failed ICSI last April, and I started again a couple of month ago... Just have to be patient now, January, here we come!!


Take care
souris
xxx

[lynne]

Hi girls. Welcome back Em.
Am avoiding the TV news. I can't believe the fuss over George Best. It is starting to make me angry- not that I need any help in the anger department today. Ever get the feeling all around you are useless?

I didn't know that the body heals itself each month.and I've been trying since July to be a good girl. Shucks I could have waited- and I'm quite disappointed champagne is bad for you. Oh well, at least I can have a drink tonight with a clear conscience.
Leanne, I think I may search out your bit on egg sharing. If you think on could you move it to the top for me? It interests me, but I'm not sure if I am firstly brave enough and secondly strong enough to go through it. The future implications seem daunting as well.

Souris, I do feel a bit better today though I got quite wound up over nothing this morning, which isn't like me. Found myself almost in tears and I was only on the phone to the insurance company! It must be hard not having DH around. Does he work away? I still can't bring myself to really relax with my DH after last weekend. Our relationship is so complex I don't know how I feel. I just know that it got to the stage where he had no option but to agree to kids. So I will never have the assurance of knowing, as you do that your DH is going through this because he really loves you.
I always feel like I am having such a moan, so I shall stop now before I get worse. Hopefully they will have stopped going on about George Best and his 2 livers. I think I shall celebrate with a pre- Advent glass of womb thickening red.

[souris]

Hi lynne
DH and I leave together, but I have to go back to France for the tmt, while he will be working ...

Just came back from the beach, got the worse sunburn ever, my face look like a tomato, had to put tons of fondation not to scare dh! AAAHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAHHHHHH, it hurts and i am going to peel!!!

[NickiMark]

sun burn?? How i wish i could see the sun right now!!! It's freezing!! Brrrrr!!

[souris]

Nicki, thinking of you tomorrow.... good luck and finger crossed! baby dust!

xxx
souris

[lynne]

Yeah... Good Luck Nicki!

Souris, I pity your poor sunburn. I bet it is really painful . We are lucky here and have avoided the snow that seems to be everywhere else in Britain.
MY SHOWER IS FIXED- HURRAY! After 10 days of waiting the workman actually came when he said he would. So here's to bubbles and cleanliness. Now I've just got to find a gas man who will turn up.
Have a good weekend all!

[souris]

Hi Lynne,

yeah, feels like I am cooking...and it 2 weeks time, I will be in France, like in the UK, it is snowing there... what a shock it is going to be for me!

Congrats for your shower!I am sure you will enjoy it... what is best than a nice hot shower when it's cold and grey outside!!

Heather, I hope you are well... the 6th is very near now...
wish you a lot of patience!!

Have a nice week end all
take care
souris
xxx

[amfy]

Well - I've read through the last 4 pages because it looks like I will be joining you lot.

Had a BFN last Friday following ICSI and have been very down. We have got 2 embryos frozen so we will be looking to have a FET, probably ET about the end of the first week in January.

Straight away i am feeling like i fit in here. My DP also has a 13 year old son. He had always wanted more, but his ex wife had 2 already from her first marriage so would only agree to have one more. Although I know DP really wants more children, sometimes I can be very frustrated or insecure about the fact that he already has a child.

Our ET was booked for 5pm on a friday which clashed with his son's football training. DP worked out that if he went about it a certain way, he could still get his son to football training and there would "just about" still be time to get me to ET. Then he could nip back to pick his son up before coming back for me.

I'm afraid i went slightly berserk! I didn't want to spend the last hour before my ET fretting whether we were going to make it on time. I didn't want to be doing ET on my own while he ran round after his son. He said his son has had a rough enough time with the divorce and he will not mess him about or let him down for anything and....get this...If i had kids of my own I'd understand that!!!!!

I was really upset and in the end he did ring his son and tell him he was really sorry but he would have to miss football training because of taking me to hospital. I then really felt like the wicked step mother even though, under normal circumstances, I will always put myself out to accomodate his son, in fact it was me who trailed round the local playing fields on sunday mornings to find him the football team! Is it me? Was I wrong? I mean, I wouldn't love him so much or want children with him if he wasn't such a great, devoted and RELIABLE Dad, but I just felt that this was important enough for me (and our potential children) to come first without me having to throw a hissy fit!

Anyway - i was a bit off on one there. Hello New Year buddies!!! 2006 is going to be just fine!

[souris]

Hiya Amfy...Welcome!

I am sorry about your BFN...
But two little embies are waiting for you, and I hope they will bring you happiness and joy for this new year!!

I am also one of those evil "step mum" (hate that term...) so maybe we should have a thread dedicated to us!!
No matter what I do for those children, it always turns against me!! Maybe if I stop being nice to them and doing things for them ,things would get better?? I wish sometimes i did not care, things would be much easier!

I know too well the " darling, I dont mean to be nasty, but you dont have children so how would you know??" ARGHHH!! Well, sometimes I feel I know a lot more and better! Sometimes DH just dont get it!!

So Amfy, it's not you! I would have react the same, for god sakes, you were concieving! It's only normal for DP to be with you!

I am sure DP's son was messed up because of the divorce, but come on! it's not an excuse for everything and I am sure he survived not going to football.

Oh well, better stop here before having a stroke!

Take care
souris
xxx

[pauline69]

Hi Amfy & welcome, sorry to hear about your BFN.

Hi to all my other New Year buddies - it is fast approaching. 1 week to go and I have my appt with clinic when we will hopefully be given approximate dates - getting excited, but nervous about getting on the roller-coaster again, but hey ho, needs must. I'm also looking forward to the time off work - because my line manager is a j*rk, I'm taking approx 2 months off for this cycle.

Hope everyone else is doing good.

Pauline x

[alisondrake]

Hi Pauline,

Nice to see you on this thread. Looks like we'll be trying again at the same time! I start down regulating next week ready for FET in Jan.

After everything we've been through this year it feels strange to be excited again but I guess that's a positive thing!

Good Luck

Alison

[amfy]

Thanks for responding to my wildly ranty post. i think i am still a bit overly hormonal!!! Thank God i'm not doing this again till after Christmas!