Oct 05 Cycle Buddies

[Inhale, Exhale]

Salutations Bubble Gums!

Well, I have been waiting to post thinking that the nurse would call with my HCG report and I could post a big fat zero, but, alas it turns out that lab results are quite like watching a pot and getting it to boil............

Lola Love Bugs- have mental picture of Demetrio in raft, wearing banana hammock and asking for sunscreen application...
And I agree- that nasty little phrase shall be removed from vocabulary immediately- afterall, it only allows for what if's and could have been's- scratch that! As far as my cycle- Agent Bristow, you inquisitive little kitty- my FET will include estrogen and progesterone- thank god! Without progesterone my LP is about 6 days long- doesn't cut the mustard! How bout yourself sweets? What's in your little bag of tricks?

Little R- you want snow, we got your snow! Tis the season to be slushy- fa-la-la-la-la... We gotta a little snow, go a little rain- we made snowcones. It is warming up round here- 34 today!
I will be thinking of you tommorrow as you say goodbye to your sweetest little. Will refund ticket to emotional rollercoaster for this short time. But I must insist to take it back after, moving directly to fun house- although I have never found these to be fun, fun is implied in the title. Not an actual house either, although again, implied in the title. False advertising I say.

Now, we must discuss Alias- I have boycotted and will no longer watch. They have removed that little tasty morsel that was Vaughn.

Also- kuddos to me please, I have completed my Christmas shopping! Hoo- RAH. and a week early! very unlikely event for me. this will leave more time for wine and mango margaritas while practicing the "oh, wow, this is such a nice gift" face. very important not to over or under do. technique must be perfected if to be believable.

Wow- took a pee break before finishing post and I think that AF has arrived... just slight pinkish ting on TP. Does this mean I will be doing FET soon? Guess i should call the man in the white coat.

One final thought- we cannot break up the group! Octoberlerones forever! However, am interested if other gals out there are also waiting for next try- way to incooperate the two? Lola- doc, think on this smarty pants.

OK, well, off to get some info!
Steph

[Inhale, Exhale]

We interrupt this regularly scheduled program with important breaking news......

my progesterone is 2.9 I am probably beginning my period now. They will recheck HCG in 2 weeks. If it is 0, then I will begin FET cycle with next period!!!! They will do baseline info on day 1 of AF, start estrogen then and 18 days later do the transfer!! I may have my little ones back very soon!!! Hooray. Arnie and Buffy are putting on their leg warmers and very fashionable terry cloth head bands and arm cuffs to match- all very 80's. Jane Fonda will lead the warm-up and stretches.........

party on!
Steph

[Walshy]

Hi Ladies,
Well I have now offically finished my christmas shopping thank god. I had people stalking me back to my car for my parking space today that is how hectic it was...

I am happy that there are a few of you that have got good news and will soon be reunited with your little embies....

Steph - glad I've given you hope that your little ones will defrost. I'm sure they will be fine as they only freeze the ones that they think will survive the thaw. Your anniversary sounds spectacular sex for fun *sigh*. It's great news about Arnie and Buffy that they will joining you again soon.

LItlle R - I hope your goodbye was cleansing and when your ready to start again I wish you all the sticky vibes.

Lola - I can not believe you have a hernia. Your such a positive person it is great to see.........I live a couple of suburbs away from Coogee. I hope your next 3 months go fast and you are also reunited with your little frosties...

Stephanie, Camilla & Leigh - How long until your scans.... Is there any chance that any of you are having more than one?

Jen - Bring on February for you to start again. Enjoy your Christams party. My DH is at his at the moment at the races but i couldn't be bothered going so he went with a friend so I can imagine what state he will be in later when he gets home. Free alcohol and food he will be in fine form.............

Well i have nearly finished 1 week of the 2ww wait.....I wish I could just sleep the whole time and wake up for the test. I thought I wouldn't think about it as much due to the time of year but i can't stop.......
Talk to you soon and thanks for all the PMA that you are sending me I can feel the love from Angela

[lolajones]

hey hey and buenas noches amigas

I too can report that I have finished my Christmas shopping Whoop Whoop!!!! I was like a purchase ninja - worthy of my wink wink "training". Enter shop, use Spy Eye (TM) to seek and find gift, take gift to checkout, adopt "queue friendly demeanor" and PURCHASE AT SPEED with a perky "Merry Christmas" to the sales person. Repeat.
Am going in to work tomorrow figured I should. Have my colleague on weep alert for quick taxi exit - Plan A. Jump through window = Plan B. Only 2 people know why I've been off. Will tell the others that my breast implant exploded and give a wink and flash my fire arm. Man how I wish I owned a gun. I mean I obviously utterly disagree with the whole gun and violence thing. But. Just to see a few key personnel faces if I wielded a Glock for kicks. I have been watching far too many Buffy, Law and Order etc re runs while off work. Clearly.

has Vaughn really left Alias?? I am so not up to speed, evil schedulers think midnight mid week a great time for The Bristow, tsk. I loved Vaughn. A lot. I think he loved me back too. Bittersweet.

So the Steph will be semi medically cycling soon!!! Arnie! Drop down and give me 10!! Make that 20 son!!!! Honestly ladies - I've heard it from an Important Source that 2006 will be our year of pregnancy. The karma Merry-go-round, faults repaired during Christmas shut down, will give us what we deserve. Like I said, don't ask me to reveal my sources, just trust Agent Lola.

Demetrio and I have finally come to an agreement on the rowing rota but it was a battle hard fought. And a bit sweaty, yeuch

I agree! Octoblerones siempre but maybe you should also join feb 06 cycle buddys too for people cycling the same time as you? Obviously, you must promise not to neglect us.... We'd hunt you down anyway......
My next cycle (so far away it is like a big fat fiction) will be fully medicated, deregg and oestrogen patches n progesterone. But maybe by 2009 there'll be a whole other set of meds.....

Little R - you are an interrogaters dream! I didn't even have to polish the electrodes. How was your goodbye? I was telling my dh about it and it made me cry. I hope that you're feeling ok. Did it help?

Walshy not long now sweet cheeks and the wait will be over. No pressure but you are now the last 2005 hope of the group. Like I said, no pressure. Let us know how you're getting on and PMA!!! Go Walshy Go Walshy

Jemla how did the return to work go? Tearful? Glad its over? Good luck for your appointment on Wednesday and keep up the positivity!

The Laden Ones - hope you are all blooming and glowing! Sending you lots of love.

So indeed, me and Henrich the Hernia are wage slaves once more from the morrow. Have decided that Henrich will be my lucky, fortune telling and wise cracking hernia side kick. Its like a lifestyle alarm - if I walk too much or carry too heavy a load H le H gives a warning ache and sarcastic remark which escalates to a demonic searing pain and thinly veiled insult-o-gram signal if I persist in the particular activity. I know!! Fantastic!!

Anyhoo, hope all the wonderful women of Octoberness are happy n skippin'

Lumps o good lovin'
Lola
xxx
triple X

[Jen1d]

Hi girls,
Well returned to work and all was fine although there is always going to be a couple of people who don't say anything and skip past the fact that you have been off. Opened my tray to find a leaflet staring back at me, which read "do you need help to finance your childcare", so that set me up for a fine and chearful day??
Then came the work night out. It's the first time i have hit the bottle for months and now probably my last given the headache i had but i must say it was so much fun and great to take my mind off ivf for a few hours.
Have just come off a sleepover and feel quite tired so will catch up with you all on Wed after my Dr app. They better beware Jemla is on the loose.

Thinking of you all as always

Love Jen x

[Inhale, Exhale]

Ahoy Matey's of the Good Ship Lollipop!!!

Word of the Day: Bah-Humbug.
Can't quite get into the Christmas spirit this year. What's not to love- annoying relatives, kids everywhere, no money left and presents that are so awful that they go directly to the Goodwill.

Presents for In-laws: $400
Groceries for Christmas Dinner: $200
Hidden flask in kitchen: Priceless

So, initial excitement of impending FET over. Will be an additional $2500. With 2 surgeries, IVF, drugs, ultrasounds and D&E already paid for from savings, we are a little low right now. DH said we may have to wait a little while to pay another $2500...... So, Lola-lewy, looks like I will be joining you in 2009. Keep you chicy-doos posted on that one! If I whine enough he may say let's just do it...... He is putty in my hands.

Lola and the Lips,
Demetrio is getting a bit crispy from all the sun, time for a flip eh? He also has that look in his eye- you know when men want something. Can't decide if it is food he is craving or a little piece of Lola pie! Mmmm.
Sorry to ruin the Alias surprise- I forget you aren't watching the same time I am. Tis the last season for that gem of a show. I say good riddens y'all.
Although am a fan of the exploding boob saga, would be much more entertained if you told everyone you were committed for addiction to holiday candied yams and thoughts of sugar plums dancing in your head.


Jen- sorry you had to return to the land of the "insensitives" and the "ignorers". However, we are stronger than they are stupid.

Walshy- I see the light at the end of the tunnel! Halfway aint a bad place to be. If bored you could always join Lola and her boy toy Demetrio. He's enough man for two!

Little R- let me know how the goodbyes went.

Cheers!
Steph

[lolajones]

Helloo

Just a quick post to say a fond Merry Christmas to my buddies.
Its been quite a year for all of us so we deserve a spectacular festive holiday.
Looking forward to the new year as the bumps grow and the rest on the raft get their much deserved BFPs.
Thank you for all just being there when I've been down and making this awful past few weeks so much better. You are top!

Anyway, have a wonderful Christmas

Lots of love

Lola
xxxxx

PS Dirty Demetrio sends his best too

[little R]

Octobuddies.....how are you all?

I have had a busy few days, hence the silence.....suitcases packed and now only awaiting DH's return from Perth so we can commence our Xmas holidays in arctic temperatures!

The countdown begins...first stop-off: in-law city where full body-armour is required!

Anyway....

Jen: how are you doing? Well done for being so brave when returning to work.....argh, I am always amazed at the insensitivity of others.... well, nothing new on that horizon!
So have you kept the infamous bottle stowed away under your bed? Congrats.... welcome back! You so deserve the fun...let your hair down, girl..... and go burn that leaflet...

Walshy: what's cooking? How are you faring? Have you been reading? Watching TV? What's your poison of choice?
Are you keeping those negative thoughts at bay? How's your PMA level? Does it need some topping up....I can Xmas express mail you some sunny thoughts before I leave for the cold climate. Anyway, you are our last hope for 2005 I am rooting for you ALL the way.

Lola: dearest..... thank you for your Xmas greetings.... yes, let's hope 2006 is the best year ever (hmm, maybe you should proclaim that one out loud as I am lacking credibility....I have been screaming it straight for over 4 years )... at this point, with a grin, I can tentatively say "It couldn't get any worse could it?" Hihihihihhihihi, I am SUCH a positive person. Anyway, hope you are doing better and you can spend a painfree Xmas... otherwise, the doctor would order downing large quantities of the best numbing potion available! You have yourself a Merry Xmas....as you are a merry Octobuddy. Oh...had to share, one of my friends has lent me "Desperate Housewives" so I have something entertaining that awaits me after the holidays.

Steph: sweetie, I am so sorry to hear about your news....but it's only postponed....and honestly, it's just around the corner. I am thinking about you and hope that your disappointment won't ruin your holidays. However, knowing your level of PMA...I doubt it is possible....you're all smiles about seeing the in-laws I know, I can relate! Arnie and Buffy will soon be home...hurrah! You take care, my patient friend.

Camilla - heaps of kisses to you and your DF. Enjoy your Xmas present

Lots of love to ALL of you Octofriends (bump and bumpless!) across the globe.

Wishing you ALL much deserved end of the year celebrations with family and friends....

Know that I will be thinking of you all,

Heaps of love,

Little R

[little R]

I wanted to share the following with you, my closest buddies as we have already shared so much together....

Yesterday my DH and I finally made it to our much needed goodbye ceremony.....and I am glad really.
It tooks us a while to find an appropriate time but yesterday was wonderful....as I found the most perfect rose.
I am not kidding, I have never seen a rose of such splendour, colour, size, shape.... perfection, I maintain.

So DH and I walked out, hand in hand, with our beautiful rose towards the end of the rocky pier at our local beach....we clambered over the rocks and then sat with our feet in the lapping water....pondering on all that had happened these past weeks and enjoying being sprayed by the waves.
We held on tightly to each other whilst we watched the sun setting....at first, I thought I wouldn't be able to say goodbye....
the tears, the sadness...it all came rushing back again........
I think I will always carry the sadness with me but I know in my heart that it will subside over time...but never be forgotten.
After a few moments of silence, I kissed my DH, stood up and whispered to my Little Angel "I love you and I am letting you go" whilst throwing our perfect rose into the sea..... we watched as our Little Angel landed amongst the waves and floated out to sea....
It couldn't have been a more emotional moment for both of us, but a much needed one.
Now, we have created a happy memory of our goodbye....

Little R

[leigh]

Little R
Not posting much anymore but just wanted to say how lovely your goodbye was, it made me cry, it sounded beautiful. I hope you will get much comfort from that memory.
Thank you for sharing it with us.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[camilla]

Dearest Buddies

I'm sorry it's been a week since my last post I'm feeling sick and tired (not complaining) and finding it quite debilitating getting ready for Christmas. Hence reason for my absence but will definitely be back after Christmas. Hope you all have a peaceful time and love to you all. Take care of your special selves and your DHs.

Lots of love and a seasonal hug.

Camilla xxx

[Inhale, Exhale]

To the scoopers and the poopers.........

Well, tis the season!
To have coffee and Baileys Irish Cream

Any-whos-in-whats-it...

Little R- My fab friend. Lovely, beautiful, soul-touchin story of goodbye. Tear and warm fuzzies. It sounds so perfect. You will carry that moment and your baby with you forever.
Happy holiday tootsie roll!

Camilla- sorry for the sicks. not really. envious actually. But, feel better and enjoy the festivities!

Lola- you craisin! Here's to holidays, hernias, and fat men on little rafts!
May you never be chased by mad, rabid dogs! Cheers!

Walshy & Jen- it seems you have started the vacation already, but if you check in- loves, hugs and tugs to ya. Merry, Merry!

So, I see into my crystal ball. It is showing very distinct smiley faces for all the Octo-crazies who are still without.
It also shows Lola with a blue wig and spyware walking into the sunset hand-in-hand with Vaughn. Demetrio is sadly walking behind wearing a speedo and a sunburn, slowly pulling deflated raft and asking what happened to all the good times.

So, my faithful friends. Ho, Ho, Ho Merry Christmas!

Steph

[Jen1d]

Hi gorgeous Octoberies,

Well the Chrimbo party was a blast and i had a few Morgans too many so am now back on the de-cafe.

My Dr appointment sent me back into crying mode for a couple of days but am ready to move forward again.
We had a chat about the whole cycle and she was so pleased about how everything went so smoothly. However when i explained the full details of the bleeding and how it was so close to my test day she announced that it sounded like an embie had attached. She said the bleeding usually happens after the pessaries are stopped but as this did not happen to me then it was likely one attached but did not develop further. This is the bodies way of telling me the pregnancy was not meant to be. I was gutted. So sad i was so close but still so far away. The Doc feels this is a very positive sign for my next cycle (at least there is someone positive).
Anyway on a happier note, i will be starting my 2nd cycle around the 28th Feb. I feel ok about this as its not too far away. Once Jan is over then we're laughing.
Is it just me or is anyone else wishing Christmas was over. It's the first time i have wanted it to go away. Just keep seeing people with bumps and prams everywhere. Always said i would never be one of these ivf people who long for a child and get desperate, but can see that i might get like that if things don't get happier in 2006.

Just wanted to thank you all for your help, advice and encouragement over the last few months. I have truly found the best bunch of girls and know i can log on and you will make me laugh and lift my spirits.

I hope you all have a wonderful time over Christmas and New year. Go easy on the 'lemonade'

Am going to my Mum's tomorrow for a few days, so will catch up with you all around the 28th.

Huge hug and Chrimbo wish to you all

Love Jen xx

[Walshy]

Hello Lovely ladies,

Well the results are in and it is a BFN

To say I am upset is putting it mildly.............It seems more servere than when I got all the other negatives due to the fact that they were on their way to becoming little people we saw them on the screen befroe they went back in... Before I never knew if the egg was fertilized but this time we did. It makes it also more servere in the fact that I now know it is my uterus that doesn't want to keep the eggs and I feel even worse for my DH. The look of the negative on his face tore my heart out.

They told me that I needed to do a HPT as the clinic is not open which I did this morning and got the result. Went into a 24 hour Drs surgery for a blood test so that when I go back to the clinic I can let them know what my readings are. I find out those results tomorrow morning.

I am glad Christmas is over as it was hard to be surrounded by family and little babies.

OK I'll post later when I am feeling more happier.
Cheers, Angela

[Jen1d]

Oh Angela,
I'm so sorry to hear your news. I can completely understand the feeling of loss and emptyness and the sadness for your DH. Hang in there, take time out together and have plenty of cuddles. It's ok to feel sorry for yourself and let everyone else pamper you.
We will all get there one day but some have to just wait that bit longer than others.
A huge hug to you and your DH, take care of each other.

Love Jen x