I have joined this forum to try to have an understanding of infertility, different options, etc. My daughter has been trying to get pregnant for the past couple years (normal way). The past couple of months, she tried artifical insemination a couple of times, and now she is going to Greenville SC , to a clinc for invitro- fertilization. As a mother i am very interested in how the procedure works, and also am interested in anyone sharing information with me on anything i can do to make it easier for her. I never give it much thought because i had two easy pregnancies, 2 beautiful girls, very blessed it seems as i read foum messages and see my daughter suffering so. Please anything you can share that i need to do or how i can help her or you. Please my ears are open.
Best of luck to all of you,
Joanie
Mothers Love
Mothers Love
Thanks
Joanie
Joanie
Dear Joanie,
I think trying to educate yourself will be a huge support to your daughter. This website is an excellent resource and the women are so very supportive.
I think the best way to be supportive is to ask your daughter what kind of support she wants/needs from you. While I was going through "the journey" (2 IUIs - not sucessful; 1 IVF = sucessful - I'm 18 weeks pregnant) it was great when my mom would just listen.
What didn't help was when people would insinuate that IVF babies weren't normal. Or when people would tell me 'not to worry" and when we just would stop trying so hard it will happen. Basically, it seems like everyone has an opinion about it.
I think at a time like this, just loving your daughter and her partner, listening to them and offering a shoulder to cry on when necessary - is the best kind of support
Best of luck to your daughter, she's very lucky to have such a supportive mother.
-Susan
I think trying to educate yourself will be a huge support to your daughter. This website is an excellent resource and the women are so very supportive.
I think the best way to be supportive is to ask your daughter what kind of support she wants/needs from you. While I was going through "the journey" (2 IUIs - not sucessful; 1 IVF = sucessful - I'm 18 weeks pregnant) it was great when my mom would just listen.
What didn't help was when people would insinuate that IVF babies weren't normal. Or when people would tell me 'not to worry" and when we just would stop trying so hard it will happen. Basically, it seems like everyone has an opinion about it.
I think at a time like this, just loving your daughter and her partner, listening to them and offering a shoulder to cry on when necessary - is the best kind of support
Best of luck to your daughter, she's very lucky to have such a supportive mother.
-Susan
Whoops, Joanie, you asked about how the IVF procedure worked-
Here's how it worked for me:
FIrst they put me on birth control pills for a few weeks.
Then, every night for a week or so, my husband gave me an injection in my stomach of Lupron - which basically puts your body into menopause. I had minor side effects of a few hot flashes at night.
Then, in addition to the Lupron, my husband gave me shots of Gonal F, which stimulates egg follicles. Eventually, it was just the Gonal F.
By this point, I was going to the clinic every other day for blood work and ultrasounds.
When the doctors said the time was right, my husband gave me a shot in my rear end of HcG or HsG (I always forget), which makes you ovulate 36 hours later.
36 hours later, my husband drove me to the out patient procedure department of the clinic. They put me under anesthesia and retrieved 20 eggs.
My husband had brought a sperm sample to the clinic as well. A few days before, he had brought another sample to the clinic and that was frozen (just in case).
The lab fertilized my eggs with his sample.
The retrieval was painless and I pretty much slept the rest of the day.
The day after the retrieval, my husband started giving me progesterone shots in my rear end every night. I think I also took estrodial (sp?) for a few days.
Out of the 20 eggs, 12 fertilized, but after 5 days, only 2 were good enough to transfer back in. On that day I beleive I took a valium before the we got to the clinic. Sadly, none of the other fertilized eggs were healthy enough to be frozen.
Then- the toughest part of all - the 2 week wait until you can have a pregnancy test. Happily, I was pregnant, but with only one baby.
I was on progesterone shots for nine weeks I think.
That was the procedure I went through. I am 36, my husband is 41. I have poly cystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) which affects my ability to ovulate regularly.
Again, Joanie - best of luck to your daughter.
-Susan
Here's how it worked for me:
FIrst they put me on birth control pills for a few weeks.
Then, every night for a week or so, my husband gave me an injection in my stomach of Lupron - which basically puts your body into menopause. I had minor side effects of a few hot flashes at night.
Then, in addition to the Lupron, my husband gave me shots of Gonal F, which stimulates egg follicles. Eventually, it was just the Gonal F.
By this point, I was going to the clinic every other day for blood work and ultrasounds.
When the doctors said the time was right, my husband gave me a shot in my rear end of HcG or HsG (I always forget), which makes you ovulate 36 hours later.
36 hours later, my husband drove me to the out patient procedure department of the clinic. They put me under anesthesia and retrieved 20 eggs.
My husband had brought a sperm sample to the clinic as well. A few days before, he had brought another sample to the clinic and that was frozen (just in case).
The lab fertilized my eggs with his sample.
The retrieval was painless and I pretty much slept the rest of the day.
The day after the retrieval, my husband started giving me progesterone shots in my rear end every night. I think I also took estrodial (sp?) for a few days.
Out of the 20 eggs, 12 fertilized, but after 5 days, only 2 were good enough to transfer back in. On that day I beleive I took a valium before the we got to the clinic. Sadly, none of the other fertilized eggs were healthy enough to be frozen.
Then- the toughest part of all - the 2 week wait until you can have a pregnancy test. Happily, I was pregnant, but with only one baby.
I was on progesterone shots for nine weeks I think.
That was the procedure I went through. I am 36, my husband is 41. I have poly cystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) which affects my ability to ovulate regularly.
Again, Joanie - best of luck to your daughter.
-Susan
Joanie Hi!
I think you are great! Your daughter will need a lot of support, Ivf is emotionnaly very hard.
My treatment was like susan's one, only i was not on the pill.
All the hormones your daughter is going to take is going to make her very moody and sensitive, so my advice to you would be to be very patient and understanding.
Also, dont assume that IVF is going to work, it might not and should be both prepared for that.
Give her lots of love, but i am sure you do already!
I wish you and your family a merry christmas!
take care
souris
xxx
I think you are great! Your daughter will need a lot of support, Ivf is emotionnaly very hard.
My treatment was like susan's one, only i was not on the pill.
All the hormones your daughter is going to take is going to make her very moody and sensitive, so my advice to you would be to be very patient and understanding.
Also, dont assume that IVF is going to work, it might not and should be both prepared for that.
Give her lots of love, but i am sure you do already!
I wish you and your family a merry christmas!
take care
souris
xxx
Me 27, DH 55
04/ 05 ICSI -tive 02/06 ICSI. No fertilisation
09/ 06 ICSI. BFP!!! M/C at 12 weeks.04/07 ? ICSI -tive
04/08 ICSI BFP!!! M/C at 12 weeks
Feb 09 6th ICSI has started! neg
June 09 7th ICSI. Please make it happen!!
04/ 05 ICSI -tive 02/06 ICSI. No fertilisation
09/ 06 ICSI. BFP!!! M/C at 12 weeks.04/07 ? ICSI -tive
04/08 ICSI BFP!!! M/C at 12 weeks
Feb 09 6th ICSI has started! neg
June 09 7th ICSI. Please make it happen!!
Hi Joanie
I think it is wonderful that you are looking for as much info as posible to support your daughter. It is very important to have someone support you when going through this emotional rollocaster, for me I had my sister, she was a godsend through both cycles.
All you can do really is be there for her, I'm sure she will experience lots of different emotions through this, one minute she might be happy the next very sad, she may not know why she is feeling sad, but her hormones will be all the place. You probably know all this anyway being a women yourself, but with the drugs she will have to take to prepare her body she may have mood swings, I know I did....!
This is my second IVF cycle, my first one ended in a miscarriage at 5weeks, which really effected me, going through IVF is emotional enough but to then cope with loosing your baby after trying so hard to get it is very hard.
I am now pregnant through my second IVF cycle, I am 8wks 3days. words can't describe how I feel knowing I am actually going to have the baby I have longed for.
IVF doesn't always work and can be a very long road for some people or some people can be very blessed and get a BFP (Big Fat Positive) first time.
Anyway Joanie I wish your daughter and her husband all the best and I hope it works first time.
Once you feel ready tell her to join this site, she will get so much support, the ladies here are wonderful.
Once again I think you are a wonderful mother wanting to support your daughter, I'm sure you will find all the info you are looking for here.
Have a lovely xmas.
Lucy
I think it is wonderful that you are looking for as much info as posible to support your daughter. It is very important to have someone support you when going through this emotional rollocaster, for me I had my sister, she was a godsend through both cycles.
All you can do really is be there for her, I'm sure she will experience lots of different emotions through this, one minute she might be happy the next very sad, she may not know why she is feeling sad, but her hormones will be all the place. You probably know all this anyway being a women yourself, but with the drugs she will have to take to prepare her body she may have mood swings, I know I did....!
This is my second IVF cycle, my first one ended in a miscarriage at 5weeks, which really effected me, going through IVF is emotional enough but to then cope with loosing your baby after trying so hard to get it is very hard.
I am now pregnant through my second IVF cycle, I am 8wks 3days. words can't describe how I feel knowing I am actually going to have the baby I have longed for.
IVF doesn't always work and can be a very long road for some people or some people can be very blessed and get a BFP (Big Fat Positive) first time.
Anyway Joanie I wish your daughter and her husband all the best and I hope it works first time.
Once you feel ready tell her to join this site, she will get so much support, the ladies here are wonderful.
Once again I think you are a wonderful mother wanting to support your daughter, I'm sure you will find all the info you are looking for here.
Have a lovely xmas.
Lucy
Me 26, DP 36. 1st IVF - June 05 - +ve - m/c at 5 wks
2nd IVF - Nov 05 - +ve - m/c at 8.5 weeks
3rd IVF -May 06 - BFN
4th IVF - Oct 06 -BFN
5th IVF - May 07 - BFN
2nd IVF - Nov 05 - +ve - m/c at 8.5 weeks
3rd IVF -May 06 - BFN
4th IVF - Oct 06 -BFN
5th IVF - May 07 - BFN
there are lots of ups and downs.
with the meds that some have to take there can be some mood swings.
and ivf can be very hard. you have no control over anything.
some times just a little note saying i love you
or send a little card.
for me it was hard when someone wood try anf do or say something to fix it ..
and no one can do that..
the tears and hurt are real ..
try not to take anything personal.
see if you can get her to look around this forum.
there is amazing friends on here. i dont know what i would have done with out them..
with the meds that some have to take there can be some mood swings.
and ivf can be very hard. you have no control over anything.
some times just a little note saying i love you
or send a little card.
for me it was hard when someone wood try anf do or say something to fix it ..
and no one can do that..
the tears and hurt are real ..
try not to take anything personal.
see if you can get her to look around this forum.
there is amazing friends on here. i dont know what i would have done with out them..
we werent blessed with our babies to raise here but we our blessed with our grandaughter
and all of our many adopted and foster children that touch our lives
and i am glad to add that our 6th grandchild will be born this spring!!!!
and all of our many adopted and foster children that touch our lives
and i am glad to add that our 6th grandchild will be born this spring!!!!
Thanks, what a Great Group of People!
I want to thank everyone who responded to my concerns, I appreciate you all. Most of all i wish you all the best with your pregnancies. I give Amanda information about this site, and hopefully she will join in and get plenty of positive energy from all of you as i have. Thanks again Joanie
Merry Christmas to all!
Merry Christmas to all!
Thanks
Joanie
Joanie