2nd failed attempt

TJ · Post by TJ » Sat Jun 28, 2003 8:18 pm

Hi Im TJ, 33 years old...... I have just found this site, I started looking because I feel as if I need to speak to people who have been through the same/similar thing, as talking to friends and family can sometimes be difficult. This is our second attempt at ICSI (IVF) and we have both, my husband and I, been very distraught, it has hit us hard the 2nd time around. When my period started I was devastated, I thought I cant go through this a third time, but I have come to terms with it a bit since (a week today) and yes I do want to carry on again. Then I started to think, what can I do differently, so I am open to any advice or suggestions from anyone.

caz · Post by **caz** » Sun Jun 29, 2003 6:30 am

HI there TJ Just wanted to say that I'm really sorry it didnt work out for you I am on first ICSI and sitting here at 730 on a Sunday morning - wide awake - waiting for call from clinic to find out it we have any embryos. So I'm not the expert I'm afraid. But just wanted to say all the best...there do seem to be lots of people on this site for whom tmt hasnt work first few times - but they do eventually get pg! And you have the advantage of still being young - times is def on your side I would have thought. Good luck anyway. Do you mind my asking - why do you need IVF? I have slight PCOS and we have severe male factor. All the best Cazx

Dawn Blake · Post by **Dawn Blake** » Sun Jun 29, 2003 7:05 am

TJ So sorry to hear your sad news, as Caz said, there are many people on the site who have failed again and again (me included, now on 5th attempt - hurrah!), but there are also those who get pg first time, unfortunately there is no telling, but each and every time I have failed (especially last time) that was it, and I never ever intended to go through it again, and a year later here I am! I always find it easier to have a bit of a break, get our lives back together, have a few wild nights out and be a couple again, rather than living and breathing IVF, for me it helps. Wishing you both every success for the future, take care of each other, Lots of Love Dawn x

TJ · Post by TJ » Sun Jun 29, 2003 7:10 am

Hello Caz, thanks for replying... I hope you get your call soon and its good news! Will you be going in for transfer soon? Good luck with that too. No I dont mind you asking, I too had PCOS but was operated on back in June last year, but then that still didnt work so a sperm test was carried out which showed a low count, therefore we started on ICSI. Good Luck TJx

TJ · Post by TJ » Sun Jun 29, 2003 7:19 am

Hello Dawn, Five attempts you must be strong, what period of time has this been over? We had only a two month break from our 1st to our second because I felt ready and wanted to get on with it. This time I think I will do the same although im not 100% sure! I know I have probably got time on my side, but it dosent feel like that to me. Its so hard when friends are getting pregnant around you, I try to be strong but do shed a few tears on my own. The wild nights out and being a couple again is certainly good advice... Thank you, keep in touch TJ x

GB · Post by GB » Sun Jun 29, 2003 10:41 am

Dear TJ I am soo sorry to hear your bad news...and hoping that you are slowly coming round and feeling better and more positive about things. I can totally empathize with you as I've just got a negative after the 3rd time....and boy, it's tough!!!!!!!!! You can read my thread if you wish. One just has to somehow find the inner strength to carry on life and pick yourself up. Just somehow believe that it will happen one day, no matter what it takes or how long.... I know that it's hard...especially when friends, family and colleauges are all having babies or telling baby stories...while you just have to smile, while you're crying inside.... I know as I've been there many times before. Anyway, here's just wishing you lots of love and luck...and hoping only for the best! As Dawn said, just go out and have fun for a while and enjoy being a couple...(and do all the things you want to do before you have kids) Treat yourself to a nice night out or a nice few days away or something.... Take care and thinking of you. Love Gila x-x-x

TJ · Post by TJ » Sun Jun 29, 2003 5:47 pm

Hi Gila Sorry to hear it didnt work out for you again either. What are we to do, there dosent seem to be any advice on what to do while going through the cycle, I keep thinking about what I might of done, but other than stress, I dont think I do much else for it not to work. I do find I get a lot of headaches through the cycle, I had one exactly a week before my period started and I was really upset and got into a panic because I thought I know what this means, but the period didnt come until a week later and I got yet another headache before that. I do try to keep calm but I cant help but worry about everything, which I suppose dosent help. Thanks for your kind words TJ x [Edited by TJ on 29-Jun-03 19:54]

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