1st trimester friends

k · Post by k » Fri Jul 01, 2005 5:47 pm

Hi everyone

Sorry to hear of all your worries re the spotting etc. This is one worry I havent had, but I have worried about lots of other things!! I guess its just natural for us to worry after all we have been through. As others have said, I have read a lot of posts of other women on this site who have had spotting, so it is obviously more common than we are led to believe in pregnancy.

Talking about other worries, why do 'well meaning' friends feel they have to tell you of the negative aspects of pregnancy\birth which have happened to them? Im trying to decide which hospital to go to. Im tending towards the furthest one (although still not far) because thats where I had my IVF treatment leading up to EC and ET. (I had this in another hospital). Its also more modern. I so far havent had good reports of any from friends who have been there! Im lucky to have a friend who is a midwife and matron at one of the hospitals and have been talking to her today. She is arranging for me to look around both and make my own mind up and has put my mind at rest. Why do people think you want to hear the negative stuff? Im not saying to lie to me and tell me everything will be wonderful and pain free(!!) but they dont have to tell me this with glee do they?

Sorry, im just getting sick of other people sticking their oar in and telling me what I should and shouldnt be doing. (Some who have also never had children as well).I must just be hypersensitive at the moment!!

Hope you are all doing well and enjoying your pregnancies.
Love Kim

Susie · Post by **Susie** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 6:05 pm

Hi all
K - I so know what you mean about everyone telling you horror stories about birth, I heard loads of stories but not one was like the birth I had so ignore them all. My advice is yes child birth is very painful physically, but having gone thru IVF I would say that is much more painful not just the needles but all the stress that goes with it.
Hope all you girls having spotting are all OK, my friend had proper periods every month until she gave birth so I dont think you should worry too much.
I have no symptoms of being pg. Not sick tired or anything, so I'm worried that something has happened, but I dont have a midwife yet so cant ask her to listen for heartbeat just to reassure me.
Is there anyone else here with no nausea. I had a bit at first but its all gone now
Susie

Sher8 · Post by **Sher8** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 7:49 pm

Susie -
I have not really had any nausea so far. Some light sick feelings in the a.m. that quickly go away once I am fully awake.

K -
I really got a kick out of your post. I have only told two friends and our families know. So far the two friends who know have offered their 2 cents on pregnancy issues. This will probably be magnified when we make the grand announcement. As much as I want to tell the world I am pregnant, I am also enjoying this quiet time. We decided to announce at 12 weeks.

Those with spotting/bleeding -
I wish for you all to receive feedback from your doctors soon. I think the best feeling is when you get confirmation that everything is a-ok. And believe me, if it is not one thing it is another.

Suz - Are you out there? I was curious how your scan went on Monday?? Hoping all is well with you.

ESTHER · Post by **ESTHER** » Sat Jul 02, 2005 11:53 am

ladies

How wonderful to have friends like you. The advice and words of encouragement have really helped this ever worrying woman. Thank you.

K- Talking about friends, one so called friend of mine once reffered to my pregnancy as not a proper pregnancy i.e these kinds of pregnancies like yours! How can another woman hurt a friend who has been trying for a baby for seven years like that. I bet she is not happy I have finally got what i wanted.Besides she has never offered me any good advice about what iam going thru at the moment re- spotting

Everyone I wish you the best of luck on your scans and have a nice weekend.

k · Post by k » Sat Jul 02, 2005 2:10 pm

Hi Esther

I cant believe what your 'so-called friend' said. Not a proper pregnancy?!! The only difference is we had help to concieve! Our babies are also v.much wanted. You can so do without friends like that!! I have one v.good friend who I have known since we were 18. She has 2 children, who are both my god daughters, and she has been a truly wonderful friend. She doesnt know what I am going through like you girls on here do, but she is always there to listen, and is so excited for me and DH. I spoke to her last night after getting wound up and she was so reassuring. Isnt it strange how people you think are friends cannot be happy for you when good things like this happen, after all you have been through? They are obviously not happy with their own lives and feel happier when yours are also not going well.
Anyway, we know we have support and friendship on here, to see us through.
Take care and enjoy the rest of your weekend.
Love Kim

Smita · Post by **Smita** » Sun Jul 03, 2005 12:20 pm

Hi all,
a silly question..but from when do we calculate how pregnant we are- if you know what I mean? As in, do i take the first date of my last Af or the date of ET or what?
Have a review with my doc tomorrow- i dont know if they'll scan- I hope they do- am jittery cause the spotting's still happening..

HOLLY SANDERSON · Post by **HOLLY SANDERSON** » Sun Jul 03, 2005 12:49 pm

Hi girls

Just have to say that I had spotting/minor bleeding on and off for months with my last preg!!!! That baby is now six and playing office with me on her Babie typewriter!!!!

Thinking of you

k · Post by k » Sun Jul 03, 2005 1:03 pm

Hi Smita

To calculate your EDD, you can use the pregnancy calculator under resources on this site. I think it calculates from your EC day. However my clinic calculate from ET day!! Its not a silly question - I think we'v all asked it! Good luck for tommorrow.Hope they can put your mind at rest.
Love Kim

Kel · Post by **Kel** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 8:19 am

We are absolutely broken... We had to say goodbye to our Lovely Little Baby on Friday... We had to the worst news possible, our 10 week scan showed poor Baby's heart had stopped.. Can't put into words the devastation to come so far, feel like I have died inside..... I didn't think it was possible to feel so empty.....My DH is holding me tight and is being so amazing at holding us together, but I am broken that I put him through this pain....I really thought it was meant to be for us this time.
Kel xx

eacole · Post by **eacole** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 9:03 am

Dear Kel,

You may not remember me, but we cycled together last autumn. I am devestated to hear your news. I am so sorry this has happened...words really aren't adequate for this, all I can say is that I'm terribly sorry to hear this, and to let you know that I'm thinking of you and your husband right now.

With love,
Elizabeth

JudeM · Post by **JudeM** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 9:18 am

Kel

I'm so very sorry to hear your sad news, you & DH must be devastated.

I know words cannot help at the moment but my heart goes out to you and your husband.

Thinking of you.

Love

Jude

LittleP · Post by **LittleP** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 10:43 am

Kel

Sending loads of love your way - I can't put any words down that will make a difference or help in any way, but just wanted to send my love and support to you both.

Thinking of you

Little P

Smita · Post by **Smita** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 11:15 am

Kel,
cliched as this sounds, just want you to know that I'm really sorry for you and your dh and just want you to know that I'm sending up prayers for you in this difficult time..

HOLLY SANDERSON · Post by **HOLLY SANDERSON** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 12:01 pm

Dear Kel,

I am so so sorry, I know nothing that I say will Help!
But just want say you and Dh are in my Prayers
Hollyx

k · Post by k » Mon Jul 04, 2005 2:14 pm

Kel

I am so sorry. I cant believe it. After all we read about the risk been so low after seeing the heartbeat. Im so gutted for you and DH.
Look after each other - you are both in my prayers.
Love Kim

1st trimester friends

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