Awaiting Treatment

[Miracle08]

Angel!!!! Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have buddy!! How are you? Been really busy at work??

[Angel505]

Miracle, Yes bit busy. Got a junior staff member here today who keeps on asking me loads of questions and I don't really mind helping except that I really want to finish one piece of work today. But looks like its not going to happen today. I really get wound up when I can't finish my planned work and tick off one thing from my "to do" list.

How are you? Busy at work?

[Welshgirl38]

Hey Ladies ...

Im here im here ..... sorry ive been MIA but lots going on! AF still isnt here im on day 43 but convinced she is waiting int he wings about to pounce any day - was up in agony at 3.30am this morning so i know she is about to show her ugly wee head! Anyhow - all made up with Brian things back to normal at our house now .... i do so love the making up dont u guys lol ...

Carolyn: Oh honey - im so sorry for u at the moment (i dont mean that to sound patronising) i just know what ur going thru. I think councelling will do u some good - let off some steam to a stranger ... its hard to do that with DH an ur parents - an altho u can do it with us, i think u need summit to get this all off ur chest. As for telling anyone else - no one knew on our first go, just me DH and the kids ... that was hard, especially as everyone expected me to be my cheery self an i couldnt be ... last time we told everyone (well family, work and friends) not the neighbours or the woman in the Spar like lol - but most people knew - and that too was so hard ... telling them it didnt work was horrible - i just text most people an they text back which was easier - once i saw them no one actually said to our faces that they were sorry - that was all done in a text. we told Brians parents face to face ... they were on hol when my AF arrived and was travelling back on test day - MIL was so excited when she saw us arriving, she was sure it was gonna be good news - its was awful telling her cos they were obvisouly disapointed - but for us more than themselevs ... i cant advise u on who to tell an who not to hun to be honest, i think u know who u can trust and who u cant, only u can make that choice. Sorry i was of no help wotsoever there lol .... I know it might be early, but ur obvisouly thinking about having another go - will u change clinics???

Angel: Mwah - desert you guys!!! No way Ho Zay!!!!! Your my bestest cyber buddies in the world EVER!!! How are u old wise one ... lol (had to laff at that comment) Im at work (as always) boring boring boring, but busy busy busy - just doing boring boring boring stuff lol ... i dont have the car to nip out for lunch so am stuck here! Weather is shite too .... where is our summer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! xxx

ICSI: OK IM SENDING IN THE BOYS TO LOOK FOR YOU!!!!!!! Whats up? Angel u must know where our Ang is ..... what she up to or did i miss summit???? xxx

Miracle: I do love ur posts - i dunno where u get ur piccies from but they are class, i love that one about arguing just to make up lol ... right up my street Hows u hun??? Xxx

Hrobinson: I know this is a bit late - but Welcome this is a lovely wee thread, with just a few of us here, but we are like a family an love it when we get new members ... makes us feel really special that u picked us Hope u are well, im looking fwd to getting to know u a bit better ... I notice from ur posts that u have a daughter ... DONT feel gulity about her ya hear - hell i have 2 daughters - the ladies here love me telling em stories about what they get up to (its making them greay aswell as me lol) They are 18 and 20 - so u can imagine the type of stories i tell lol .... they putting years on me - but it doesnt mean that i dont have the need for another child. My DH (Brian) doesnt have children of his own an my wish is that one day i can give him the chance to hold his own child an have someone call him daddy .... he deserves that so much!

God, ive rabbited on for so long - sorry if ive bored u - nothing new with me ladies im afraid ... same old same old, im off on holiday next week (from work not going no where - just to bed lol) so im booking my time off with u ladies now .... i will get on at some point, but with Brian off too im hoping to get a bit done around the house .... so will get on while i can

Xxxxx

[Angel505]

Beckyyyyyy - We missed you!!!!!!!!! Queen Becks, how can you keep on deserting us? And what d'you mean I must know where Angie is? I thought there was some conspiracy between you and her to start your own little group without us…………So, young lady - tell us what you've done with our Angie????

Good on making up with Brian. Sorry about AF - its annoying that things get messed up when we want to start tmt. Usually the next AF after a round of IVF can be quite late. My RE said that was quite normal and that its takes 2 cycles to get your body back to its normal self. Don't worry - she'll be with you soon. Agent Miracle - you need to send your troops to find the terrible Mrs AF and ship her off to Becky.

So ummm, you want leave again next week?? I'm not too sure about that. Last time we let you off for a few days, you took a lot of liberty and went off for much longer. Miracle what do you say? We'll have to make an executive decision on this one.

How's the weight loss going?

[Miracle08]

Oh my gosh, you girls keep me laughing!!! Glad you like my piccies Becky!!

Yeah, I am swamped here at work. But o well, my best buds come first!!!
So glad to have you back Becky. Hmmmm, you want to go off next week...AGAIN?? What the heck? Don't you think your expecting a little much?? I dont know! Angel, not sure what we should do. If we let her go she might just do the same and stay away for weeks!! Becky we dont trust you anymore. You are going to have to gain our trust back!!

Angel, tell your "junior" to get lost. I hate when they have people shadow me. They just get in your way!!!!

Anyone heard from BeachBaby?? I bet she has delivered those miracles!!!

[chriss]

Carolyn,
Please don't think of us as the BFN Group. We are not. Our miracles are coming. Do you know what I am going to say next????..... Patience. I know it's tough to hear, but for some of us, it's takes more time. Don't give up. I hope that you are beginning to feel a little better. Believe me, I know how hard it is after a BFN, I've had MANY. But it is going to happen. So take the time you need to grieve, but you will feel better as time goes on. You will. You will. (Please don't think that I am too tough on you, it's all with love.)

Miracle, glad the headahces are going away. How cool is that? What kind of pills?

Welcome back Becky.

Hi girls, just back from my sis's house. Spent the night with her family. (2 kids, very cute. Got lots of much needed bear hugs.) Off to the beach for now. More later.

[Miracle08]

NO YOU DIDNT CHRISS!!!! Just rub it in that you are going to the beach while the rest of us are miserable at work!!! What kind of crap is that???

Seriously, I hope you have a fabulous time!!! You deserve it. Glad to hear you had a really good time with your sister and nieces/nephews!!
Can I ask you a question... Does it bother you to be around your sisters kids at all??

[ICSI GIRL]

HELLO MY LOVES!!!!!!!!!!!! First of all -- i do apologize for being MIA..... off on holiday last week and came back to god-awful mess here at work!!!!!!!!! Have only a brief moment, but wanted you all to know i was thinking of you........and that i've missed you all terribly!!!!

Hoping by weeks end i'll have a bit more time for proper catch up..... sorry, but have to go now...........

Carolyn --- so very sorry honey.......((((((((((BIG HUGS)))))))))))

[chriss]

Glad to hear you had a really good time with your sister and nieces/nephews!!
Can I ask you a question... Does it bother you to be around your sisters kids at all??

Mir, I would be lying if I said that I don't feel the sadness when I am around them, but I have to admit that they make me smile and I feel good so much more than the times I feel sad. My sister and I are very close. Next to my DH, she is the first one I call whenever anything happens... I feel like she's been on this rollercoaster with me half the time. She's the one I called at 6:30am on a saturday morning when I got my first positive pregnancy test, she's the one I called immediately after leaving the obgyn learning that the baby's heartbeat stopped and wasn't growing. Ya get my drift? She's my number one fan. She and my nephews really take care of me. It's very sweet. She's got the older one saying prayers for me every night at bedtime. He's been doing his prayers since he could first speak and he's only three years old. But... yes, I feel sad at times when I watch the whole family interaction thing... when her DH comes home and the kids crawl all over him and when we go out to COSTCO together to shop. I do yearn for the family of my own... and DH and I will get it. We will. That's just the way it is.

And another but... I am very close with my nephews. My name is like the third word my nephew could say, no kidding... mommy, daddy and "sissy" (He couldn't say the "ch" sound) I guess it's bitter sweet. Are you asking because it's difficult for you to be around kids? Cause besides my nephews and my sister, I really keep far away from babies and pregnant ladies... I am working on that. Ya know trying to feel good for them. I talk about it with my sis a lot and she says, even if it hurts, just say to yourself... "Wow, that's a miracle, what a beautiful thing." She doesn't want me to put out the negative vibes. She is WAY insightful. Is this making sense? Are you glad you asked? HA HA. I'm a whacko, but that's what IF will do to ya.

[hrobinson]

Chriss- It is so nice to hear how close you are with your sister. I am the same way. There are times that I call her before my dh. she and I have always been super close. I even call her every day on my way home from work. In the summer when I am on break, we still manage to talk at least once a day.
She has 2 boys who are just wonderful kids. I love them to pieces. However, sometimes I am jealous that she has them.

I know personally for me, it is hard to be around babies, or pregnant women. I especially have a hard time being around pregos who are really young. UGH!!!
I have noticed lately that everyone and their dog either just had a baby or is pregnant. Why not me?

I ran into a teacher friend of mine the other day and she just found out she is pregnant. She didn't seem overly excited about it and I just wanted to shoot her. It waas doubly hard for me when she told me when her due date was (which if I had gotten pregnant would have been around mine). Oh well, we move on.

Miracle- You did not offend me by your post. I know it is harder for people to understand my bi$$$ing and complaining about not being able to get pregnant when I already have my daughter. What most don't understand is that I wanted a "herd" of kids my whole life...I always wanted 8-10 kids. However, I just say now that God knew what he was doing when he decided to make it impossible for me to get pregnant.

Love reading you guys. When you guys are busy, you are busy!!!

[Miracle08]

Hi ladies!!!

Where is my buddy Angel???

Hey Chriss! I just wanted to know how you deal with being around your sisters kids. I mean, I know you love them but I just wondered how you dealt with the sadness. I think it is great that your sister and you are so close! Even better that she is so supportive and aware of your feelings. That is really cute that your nephew prays for you. So sweet. Chriss, you really are a positive person. I love that about you. I know we all have our bad days, but yours are far and few.

hrobinson- Thank goodness I didnt offend you. I felt so bad. So glad you are sticking around. What you wrote to Chriss, girl you hit the nail on the head. You are describing me to a t!!! I too, have a hard time being around the younger preggos. And it seems that I have a NEVER ending invitations for baby showers!!! I get so mad,jealous & hurt. You know, the whole "why not me!!" I havent been to shower in awhile. It is just too hard for me. My cousins wife's shower is in August and I am dreading the invite. UUURRRGGHHH!!!!


ok-Becky & Angie where are you hussies??

Carolyn, thinking of you love.

[wishfull27]

I am back from counselling .. stupid women to start with really wound me up .. so why are you here .. what can I do for you....arghhhhh .. well i am at an IF clinic why the F do you think I am here!!! .. once I had go through the first box of kleenex I calmed down a bit .. it was hard sitting in the waiting room though with all other outpatients people - some going for beta tests - some having scans - some with BFP's and sad old me .. but feel better for going except I think Mir has sent her bad head across the ocean - its pounding ... stopped at shop on way back and bought 3 cakes - eaten 2 and now feel sick too .. off to get weighed at 4pm - then to gym and back on being good from tom .. now that is soemthing I can be in control of

Still not decided what to do on telling people front .. think will lave it at moment .. too raw to deal with.

enough about me -

becks - what jobs you got lined up for brian next week then??

Chris - as always thanks for your inspiring words .. and you are so lucky to have such a strong bond with your sister and nephews.. and oh trip[ to the beach - you would get washed away today at beach in UK!!!

Icsi - hope you had a good week off .. did you do anything exciting.. lots of BACCAB action I expect

Hrobinson - welcome to the thread .. sorrry its a bit late .. do not feel one ounce of guilt over your DD - you are more than welcome to join our little cosy threadx

angel - oh wise one!!! - hope your ok and not working too hard
???

Has anyone heard of infertility network Uk - counsellor says have support groups that physically meet regionally and thought that night help - not sure if any of you had (well Becky or Angel) had heard of it ??

Guess Beachbaby Jayne will be a mummy now and not had chance to tell us yet!!!!

Carolyn xx

[hrobinson]

Wishful- So glad that counseling wasn't too bad...once you got over the hump. That is something I am not sure I could do. What are those shriks going to do about not making me IF?
Okay, must be you who istrying to lose weight....HELP ME!!!!! what exactly are you doing? I have put a lot of weight on in the past 4 years. I weigh more now than when I was pregnant with DD. UGH!!!!! So, sis and I have started to weigh in once a week and keep each other accountable. If by Christmas we have lost our goal weight then we are going shopping. I have NEVER been able to lose weight. I LOVE food too much. So, I have started working out every morning....just doing the eliptical for 15 minutes, and then doing some sit ups. I also don't eat anyhing after 7:00. But between 8am and 7pm I eat everything in site. UGH!!!
The eating fter 7 is also going to get difficult because once dh and I return to work he is hardly ever home before 7.
What to do, what to do. Any insight you can give me would be greatly appreciated.

Micale- Wondering what they told you about the headaches. the whole time I was on my 2ww I had HORRIBLE headaches, and they have continued.....it has been a whole month and I think I have egone 1 day without a headache. Told SIL yesterday that I think it might be all the hormones working their way out of my body, but how long does that take?

Miracle- I have not voluntarily been to a baby shower in forever. I must admit I am not even stable enough to go buy a gift. It is so hard for me to go look at "baby" things.
Last summer my neighbor , who is just a wave and say hi friend, told everyone I was throwing her a baby shower. So, the day after I got my BFN she came knocking to give me all the "to do's" for her shower. I thought it was so insensitive. I did throw the shower though, and we really haven't spoken much since then. she is a real nut job. Sadly not only do I live next to her, I also work with her.

Enough about me....
Hope to hear more from you guys later. Gotta go get laundry done....headed on vacation for 10 days

[wishfull27]

Hi H ... ooo vacation - are you going somehwere nice ??

I did Cambridge Diet - very drastic - its all meal supplements and no food - but I found it ok and weight comes off quickly which keeps up motivation - depends how much you have to lose as to what stage you start at - found not having to make decisions about what to eat - as well as working in food environment helped immensely .. I love my food and pre cambridge diet days would think oh i will have salad for tea .. thats good - then have loads of mayo and a hunk of bread with it and for all good it did might of well have had fish and chips!!!!!

I bet headaches are all drugs coming out of system... arghhhh ... something else unfortunately to remind us that cycle did not work .. as if the AF from hell is not bad enough tooo.....

Get yoiur laundry done!!!

carolyn xx

[chriss]

Hi girls,

Welcome hrobinson, I think I know you from another thread? Glad you have joined us.

Carolyn, sorry about the headaches, this whole thing is draining, I know. Being the "loser" in the waiting room... oh I can relate. I've watched them all come and go right before my eyes. Seriously... I have seen women at the clinic and then I've seem them a few months later at the store or on the beach and whamo.... they have big fat bellies. And there I sit. Ok, enough pity talk. I am very proud of you for going to counselor. I know it may seem silly at first, but I've been going since March, once every week or two weeks and I can say that it has helped me. Often I have been able to "bring home" the tips and use them in my daily life. It has helped me in dealing with aquaintences who say unsensitive things and people who ask inappropriate questions. It has also helped me with my relationship with DH, which is and always was very strong. IT's just that IF can take a toll on your relationships. So good for you. Maybe this counselor/therapist is not the right one for you? Who knows, but give it another try or try a different one. We all feel a little defensive at first, but you will find it an amazing way to let off some steam. Hang in there. We can do this.