Becky - I know there is nothing I can say except thinking of you both and sending huge hugs - you know where we all are when you are ready to come back.
Lots of love
Carolyn
((())) xx
Awaiting Treatment
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wishfull27
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 1580
- Joined: Mon Jul 23, 2007 8:01 pm
- Location: UK
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wishfull27
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 1580
- Joined: Mon Jul 23, 2007 8:01 pm
- Location: UK
Happy new year to everyone xx
We ad a lovely christmas with parents, MIL and 2 friends - just feel as though done nothing but eat - had to work monday and Tuesday but then went up to Chesire to friends from school and 2 other friends came too with DH's - had a good night with drinks and fireworks and then home this afternoon - friend we stayed with is a midwife so lots of baby talk which was not easy but hey life goes on
Off tom too and think may venture to the gym and then the sales - mst be mad
love to everyone xxxxx
We ad a lovely christmas with parents, MIL and 2 friends - just feel as though done nothing but eat - had to work monday and Tuesday but then went up to Chesire to friends from school and 2 other friends came too with DH's - had a good night with drinks and fireworks and then home this afternoon - friend we stayed with is a midwife so lots of baby talk which was not easy but hey life goes on
Off tom too and think may venture to the gym and then the sales - mst be mad
love to everyone xxxxx
IVF 4 BFP
awww beck......believe me when i say i can TOTALLY relate to the bfp turned bfn 
had the god awful experience our last round (as i'm sure you all remember).....i too wished more than anything that it would have been bfn at end of 2ww instead of initial bfp result..... what i can offer you is a glimpse of hope....it DOES get better with time....although you may not think so right now --- i'm here to tell you that the only place to go from here is UP.....it may take some time to start working in that direction - but it DOES come.....it all seems almost patronizing from everybody saying "it's ok - it will get better"..... and it's SO hard to believe that you and brian really will heal....but it comes....
thinking of you....crying with you....my heart aching for you and brian..... sending biggest of hugs from across the pond.......
MUCH LOVE & HUGS TO YA HUN.....
had the god awful experience our last round (as i'm sure you all remember).....i too wished more than anything that it would have been bfn at end of 2ww instead of initial bfp result..... what i can offer you is a glimpse of hope....it DOES get better with time....although you may not think so right now --- i'm here to tell you that the only place to go from here is UP.....it may take some time to start working in that direction - but it DOES come.....it all seems almost patronizing from everybody saying "it's ok - it will get better"..... and it's SO hard to believe that you and brian really will heal....but it comes....thinking of you....crying with you....my heart aching for you and brian..... sending biggest of hugs from across the pond.......
MUCH LOVE & HUGS TO YA HUN.....
:-) Angie
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Welshgirl38
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 1653
- Joined: Mon Aug 21, 2006 12:46 pm
Hey Dear Friends
Happy New Year to everyone, i hope 2009 is kind to you all xxxx
Its been shite for us so far ... had a reasonable evening in with just DH, had a chinese, watched a movie - went to be at 11.15 an watched Big Ben chime in at 12 - i broke my heart as everyone cheered and started singing ... cos it was meant to be our year .. we were meant to be celebrating, cooing over scan pics and looking fwd to having our baby.
Instead we switched off the tv and held each other an cried an cried ... neighbours were out setting off fireworks ... i was so jealous of them celebrating while DH an i lay there wondering about the 'what if's'
Following bit is not too nice ladies, dont read if u feel u cant .... i understand, but i have to vent it off my chest ...
Yesterday morning i woke to a mega AF ... bright red blood and more clots that u can imagine. Its all over now .... the baby has come away, An for those who tell u that u cant see nothing - i think they are trying to be nice - cos you can, and i could. The sac came out whole in amongst the clots, but i could see it plain ... so i took it out and wrapped it in a tissue - i couldnt bear to flush it down the toilet. I couldnt belive u could see so much ... a tiny tiny what looked like a curled up grain of rice was inside - my baby - my ever loved so much baby - but it was tiny - it hadnt formed or grown as it shoudl have - but i still couldnt flush it away. I put it on my bedside cabinet wapped up in tissue and fell to pieces in DH's arms downstairs .... ive never seen anything like that in my whole life, i wouldnt wish this on my worst enemy ....
We have decided not to flush it down the toliet - and i know some of u may find this really sick - but we are going to plant it in the garden with a plant that will bloom every year around the time it would have been due (August) i just need to say goodbye in my own way, and this is the only way i know how .... a rose or summit... yeah, i'll plant a rose, that will be nice - a bright coloured one - yellow i think ...
So today is another day down .... i cant say im cured, but i havent cried - yet! I have been up since 3am and in so much pain, sevear back pain an lower abdomen - I rung the Dr and told her i was miscarrying (she didnt know until i rung) and she explained to me what to expect. I told her the sac is out but that im still in so much pain - she said the lining still has to come away. i have endo and fibroids, so i think that is making things worse ... she told me what i can take for the pain, but that it is still unbearable, to go to casualty for a D&C (altho she didnt say d&c - she said summit begining with an 'N' any ideas??)
I dont think i realised how bad this would be ... i thought i wud get a painful AF yes, but that i wud just be able to carry on as normal.
But this has really taken it out of me... I know i have to take one day at a time, and that im not gonna be feeling on top of the world physically or emotionally for a while yet - i havent put any make up on, i havent done my hair or even got dressed, since Tuesday - i basically look a mess - i know i have to buck myself up - even to feel better in myself .... I know its only been 3 days, but i feel i need to move on already .... need to get back to being 'me'
Did i tell u i had already started collecting baby's clothes and books etc ... well - they were in drawers in our bedroom, DH has just put the drawers as they are up the attic (roof space) and said we could go through them when we were feeling more up to it .... There must be about 100 pounds worth up there, if not more .... I was only 8weeks pregnant, but u know me, i love shopping and shopping for baby clothes etc became my new hobby!! But now I feel better going into the bedroom an not seeing them sat there .... maybe thats the start to us moving on .... are we doing this too early do u think??? I dont know what im meant to do ... or when im meant to do it ...
DH is my rock in all of this, he cradles me in his arms when im in pain, and when im crying, he rubs my back, he cares so much for me when he must be feeling this too .... it makes me so sad that things couldnt be different - he would have been a fantastic daddy ... He had to take DD to work this morning, an called into Homebase and B&Q to try an find summit pretty to plant in with our baby ... but he said that there is nothing appt there this time of the year, nothing that i would want anyway. I want something pretty, that will flower each year, something that i can look at and smile knowing that our angel is there with us ... So for now we will bury our angel, and mark the spot later on in the year, with a plant that will bloom just as she/he would have ...
We have talked about everything under the sun since this had happened .... even about going again, altho no decisions have been made, i think its the wrong time to make that decision yet .....but i know its on my mind, and i know its on Brians ... Money is obvisouly an issue - or lack of it, Miracle u asked if it was free here - only 1 go is free, the others we have to pay for (total arounf £4,000) having already paid that twice, our funds are low - but so is my morall, im not sure if i could do this again, i mean what if i lose it again, i just couldnt cope!
When we were comming home from the clinic on Tuesday, after having been told our baby had stopped growing - the radio was on and they were telling us the top 5 babies names for boys, and the top 5 for girls ... and DH looked at me and said - what u thinking love .... and i said - that i like number 5 for the girls names - it was Jessica, and the more i say it, the more i like it .... Jessica .....
Maybe one day .....
Ok, im babbling now .... i tend to do that a lot Thanks for listening ladies ... im sooooooooo glad i have a place to come to vent off. Thnak u i couldnt have got thru this without the support of everyone i have met on here ...
Becky Xxxxx
Happy New Year to everyone, i hope 2009 is kind to you all xxxx
Its been shite for us so far ... had a reasonable evening in with just DH, had a chinese, watched a movie - went to be at 11.15 an watched Big Ben chime in at 12 - i broke my heart as everyone cheered and started singing ... cos it was meant to be our year .. we were meant to be celebrating, cooing over scan pics and looking fwd to having our baby.
Instead we switched off the tv and held each other an cried an cried ... neighbours were out setting off fireworks ... i was so jealous of them celebrating while DH an i lay there wondering about the 'what if's'
Following bit is not too nice ladies, dont read if u feel u cant .... i understand, but i have to vent it off my chest ...
Yesterday morning i woke to a mega AF ... bright red blood and more clots that u can imagine. Its all over now .... the baby has come away, An for those who tell u that u cant see nothing - i think they are trying to be nice - cos you can, and i could. The sac came out whole in amongst the clots, but i could see it plain ... so i took it out and wrapped it in a tissue - i couldnt bear to flush it down the toilet. I couldnt belive u could see so much ... a tiny tiny what looked like a curled up grain of rice was inside - my baby - my ever loved so much baby - but it was tiny - it hadnt formed or grown as it shoudl have - but i still couldnt flush it away. I put it on my bedside cabinet wapped up in tissue and fell to pieces in DH's arms downstairs .... ive never seen anything like that in my whole life, i wouldnt wish this on my worst enemy ....
We have decided not to flush it down the toliet - and i know some of u may find this really sick - but we are going to plant it in the garden with a plant that will bloom every year around the time it would have been due (August) i just need to say goodbye in my own way, and this is the only way i know how .... a rose or summit... yeah, i'll plant a rose, that will be nice - a bright coloured one - yellow i think ...
So today is another day down .... i cant say im cured, but i havent cried - yet! I have been up since 3am and in so much pain, sevear back pain an lower abdomen - I rung the Dr and told her i was miscarrying (she didnt know until i rung) and she explained to me what to expect. I told her the sac is out but that im still in so much pain - she said the lining still has to come away. i have endo and fibroids, so i think that is making things worse ... she told me what i can take for the pain, but that it is still unbearable, to go to casualty for a D&C (altho she didnt say d&c - she said summit begining with an 'N' any ideas??)
I dont think i realised how bad this would be ... i thought i wud get a painful AF yes, but that i wud just be able to carry on as normal.
But this has really taken it out of me... I know i have to take one day at a time, and that im not gonna be feeling on top of the world physically or emotionally for a while yet - i havent put any make up on, i havent done my hair or even got dressed, since Tuesday - i basically look a mess - i know i have to buck myself up - even to feel better in myself .... I know its only been 3 days, but i feel i need to move on already .... need to get back to being 'me'
Did i tell u i had already started collecting baby's clothes and books etc ... well - they were in drawers in our bedroom, DH has just put the drawers as they are up the attic (roof space) and said we could go through them when we were feeling more up to it .... There must be about 100 pounds worth up there, if not more .... I was only 8weeks pregnant, but u know me, i love shopping and shopping for baby clothes etc became my new hobby!! But now I feel better going into the bedroom an not seeing them sat there .... maybe thats the start to us moving on .... are we doing this too early do u think??? I dont know what im meant to do ... or when im meant to do it ...
DH is my rock in all of this, he cradles me in his arms when im in pain, and when im crying, he rubs my back, he cares so much for me when he must be feeling this too .... it makes me so sad that things couldnt be different - he would have been a fantastic daddy ... He had to take DD to work this morning, an called into Homebase and B&Q to try an find summit pretty to plant in with our baby ... but he said that there is nothing appt there this time of the year, nothing that i would want anyway. I want something pretty, that will flower each year, something that i can look at and smile knowing that our angel is there with us ... So for now we will bury our angel, and mark the spot later on in the year, with a plant that will bloom just as she/he would have ...
We have talked about everything under the sun since this had happened .... even about going again, altho no decisions have been made, i think its the wrong time to make that decision yet .....but i know its on my mind, and i know its on Brians ... Money is obvisouly an issue - or lack of it, Miracle u asked if it was free here - only 1 go is free, the others we have to pay for (total arounf £4,000) having already paid that twice, our funds are low - but so is my morall, im not sure if i could do this again, i mean what if i lose it again, i just couldnt cope!
When we were comming home from the clinic on Tuesday, after having been told our baby had stopped growing - the radio was on and they were telling us the top 5 babies names for boys, and the top 5 for girls ... and DH looked at me and said - what u thinking love .... and i said - that i like number 5 for the girls names - it was Jessica, and the more i say it, the more i like it .... Jessica .....
Maybe one day .....
Ok, im babbling now .... i tend to do that a lot Thanks for listening ladies ... im sooooooooo glad i have a place to come to vent off. Thnak u i couldnt have got thru this without the support of everyone i have met on here ...
Becky Xxxxx
1 IVF=BFN 2 IVF=BFN 3 IVF=BFP
m/c @ 8 wks 
4 IVF=BFNWe must now let go of the life we had planned, to live the life waiting for us..
Adoption course starts March 19th
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AuntyPebbles
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 2382
- Joined: Sun May 28, 2006 6:12 pm
- Location: New York
- Contact:
Hi Hunny...i'm all broken with you, this is so awful...you did the right thing posting, i'm not gonna say it will help because nothing will help not yet...i love your idea of planting something in remembrance of your little one you have every right to morn the way YOU need to morn and noone has any right to tell you differently.
Please dont try to rush into dealing with your loss it wouldnt be good for you take your time it's gonna be along road ...you know where i am.
Sending much love Us
P.S i love the name too...like you say maybe one day
xxx
Please dont try to rush into dealing with your loss it wouldnt be good for you take your time it's gonna be along road ...you know where i am.
Sending much love Us
P.S i love the name too...like you say maybe one day
xxx
Me 42 ,DH 45 ...3 IVF's BFN
Mommy to my beautiful girls Gabby(4) and Kenzie(2)
Now on Face Book pm me for information..
Mommy to my beautiful girls Gabby(4) and Kenzie(2)
Now on Face Book pm me for information..
Becky,
Your post had me in tears. It is just so cruel. You are dealing with a tough thing. Like Aunty said, you did the right thing posting here.
And don't worry about what you want to do. We are't here to judge you, only to support each other. Only you can feel what you are going through. I'm sorry hun that we can't do more for you. Take it a day at a time.
Be nice to yourself, and you and Brian take care of each other. We may not be there with you in person, but please know that our thoughts are with you.
Your post had me in tears. It is just so cruel. You are dealing with a tough thing. Like Aunty said, you did the right thing posting here.
And don't worry about what you want to do. We are't here to judge you, only to support each other. Only you can feel what you are going through. I'm sorry hun that we can't do more for you. Take it a day at a time.
Be nice to yourself, and you and Brian take care of each other. We may not be there with you in person, but please know that our thoughts are with you.
Dear dear Becky
I am so sorry to crash the tread but I could not read and just run. Your posts are so heartbreakingly honest. I have tears streaming down my face. However, if you could not post here then you would have to keep it inside and that would be even more unbearable.
I only wish I could give you a huge hug. Get you plastered. Anything to take away a little of your pain.
Anything that you do is right because it is what is right for you & Brian. I think that the idea of the rose that flowers each year is truly beautiful. Take your time, do what works for the two of you babe.
I have never endured what you are going through but I have gone through the total shattering grief of there being absolutely no more chances after our 7th ivf failed. I know the utter despair. But there was an answer for me. I just did not know it at the time. I hope with all my heart that there will be a way for you & Brian. Out of the darkness, there will start to be small chards of light again. Small steps forward.
You know where I am babe if there is anything at all that I can do to help.
Much love to you & Brian.
Carolyn xxxxxxxxxxxx
I am so sorry to crash the tread but I could not read and just run. Your posts are so heartbreakingly honest. I have tears streaming down my face. However, if you could not post here then you would have to keep it inside and that would be even more unbearable.
I only wish I could give you a huge hug. Get you plastered. Anything to take away a little of your pain.
Anything that you do is right because it is what is right for you & Brian. I think that the idea of the rose that flowers each year is truly beautiful. Take your time, do what works for the two of you babe.
I have never endured what you are going through but I have gone through the total shattering grief of there being absolutely no more chances after our 7th ivf failed. I know the utter despair. But there was an answer for me. I just did not know it at the time. I hope with all my heart that there will be a way for you & Brian. Out of the darkness, there will start to be small chards of light again. Small steps forward.
You know where I am babe if there is anything at all that I can do to help.
Much love to you & Brian.
Carolyn xxxxxxxxxxxx
Me 42, DH 52 IVF #1, #2, #3 ICSI #4 - 10.05.2006, 12.12.2006, 10.03.2007, 27.07.2007 ICSI/DE/TESA #5, #6 PGD/IVIG #7 - 24.11.2007, 27.02.2008, 23.05.2008 - 7 BFNs
Surrogacy/FET #8 - 15.10.2008 - BFP
[img]http://lb1f.lilypie.com/2iB9p1.png[/img]
Surrogacy/FET #8 - 15.10.2008 - BFP
[img]http://lb1f.lilypie.com/2iB9p1.png[/img]
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wishfull27
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 1580
- Joined: Mon Jul 23, 2007 8:01 pm
- Location: UK
Becky
love the idea of the plant .. I know the garden centres have names for all the different roses and I know there is one called remebering you - not sure what colour it is but just a thought - although don't think they weill have much in at moment.
Just love the name Jessica too - like Aunty said .. maybe one day xxx
It is so good that you can come on here and put your feelings down and you lnow we are all here for you if only there was something we could do that would help heal the pain -
Sending you and DH lots of love and hugs
Carolyn xxx
love the idea of the plant .. I know the garden centres have names for all the different roses and I know there is one called remebering you - not sure what colour it is but just a thought - although don't think they weill have much in at moment.
Just love the name Jessica too - like Aunty said .. maybe one day xxx
It is so good that you can come on here and put your feelings down and you lnow we are all here for you if only there was something we could do that would help heal the pain -
Sending you and DH lots of love and hugs
Carolyn xxx
IVF 4 BFP
Hello everyone,
Becky dearest, I posted on the other thread you started when you got the sad news. I agree with the others, it's better to post and we're all there for you. I really wish I could do more. I can't say how sorry I am to hear how painful these last few days have been for you and DH. Unfortunately, pregnancies and healthy babies have nothing to do with deserving to have them. I'm absolutely convinced that you and DH would have been kind and loving parents. What happened is very unfair. What you did with your baby isn't crazy at all. I miscarried at 8 weeks and think I saw my baby among all the clots. It probably wasn't, but I still took the time to say goodbye. My grandmother miscarried three times and the last time, the baby was 2½ months old. She put it in a jewel box and took it with her to the presbitary. The priest and her organized a little ceremony and it was buried next to the church. I think that burying your little one in your garden and planting a tree is a lovely idea. If it feels right for you, then it's the thing to do.
To all the other lovely ladies, and to you Becky of course, Happy New Year! May 2009 bring you lots of nice surprises, laughter, love, and peace. Above all, may life find ways to fulfil you and bring you happiness!
Lots of love,
Sophie
Becky dearest, I posted on the other thread you started when you got the sad news. I agree with the others, it's better to post and we're all there for you. I really wish I could do more. I can't say how sorry I am to hear how painful these last few days have been for you and DH. Unfortunately, pregnancies and healthy babies have nothing to do with deserving to have them. I'm absolutely convinced that you and DH would have been kind and loving parents. What happened is very unfair. What you did with your baby isn't crazy at all. I miscarried at 8 weeks and think I saw my baby among all the clots. It probably wasn't, but I still took the time to say goodbye. My grandmother miscarried three times and the last time, the baby was 2½ months old. She put it in a jewel box and took it with her to the presbitary. The priest and her organized a little ceremony and it was buried next to the church. I think that burying your little one in your garden and planting a tree is a lovely idea. If it feels right for you, then it's the thing to do.
To all the other lovely ladies, and to you Becky of course, Happy New Year! May 2009 bring you lots of nice surprises, laughter, love, and peace. Above all, may life find ways to fulfil you and bring you happiness!
Lots of love,
Sophie
1st and 2nd IVF = BFN 1st FET BFP! m/c at 7 weeks. 2nd FET BFP! 3rd FET BFN
Now let's spend the rest of our lives having fun together!
Now let's spend the rest of our lives having fun together!
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wishfull27
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 1580
- Joined: Mon Jul 23, 2007 8:01 pm
- Location: UK
Hello everyone!
I was just checking in to check on our Becky. (and of course all you ladies as well...)
Awww...Becky. I am at loss for words. Not that it matters because it doesnt matter what others think, but I think it is a wonderful idea you have about the beautiful flower you want to plant for your little one.
I am so sorry you had to see what you saw. I can only imagine how hard that was.
I just don't understand why they don't cover infertility. It isnt fair. Here in the US some states cover and some dont. Most dont. So if you dont have $20,000 for IVF your screwed. It is just awful really. Here in the states, they pay for these "baby makers" to continue to have babies. I hope one day they will see how important infertility is.
I pray for yours and Brian's strength. I pray that your aching will be soothed.
You and Brian are on my mind constantly. Please know your friends are here for you always. We love you and hate to see any of us hurt like this.
big hugs Becky! Take it easy honey.
I was just checking in to check on our Becky. (and of course all you ladies as well...)
Awww...Becky. I am at loss for words. Not that it matters because it doesnt matter what others think, but I think it is a wonderful idea you have about the beautiful flower you want to plant for your little one.
I am so sorry you had to see what you saw. I can only imagine how hard that was.
I just don't understand why they don't cover infertility. It isnt fair. Here in the US some states cover and some dont. Most dont. So if you dont have $20,000 for IVF your screwed. It is just awful really. Here in the states, they pay for these "baby makers" to continue to have babies. I hope one day they will see how important infertility is.
I pray for yours and Brian's strength. I pray that your aching will be soothed.
You and Brian are on my mind constantly. Please know your friends are here for you always. We love you and hate to see any of us hurt like this.
big hugs Becky! Take it easy honey.
Hey Carolyn,
Yup, we posted at the same time! I had a great Xmas. On the 24th, we had dinner with friends; they gave us a last minute invitation. We had a great time, but the weather was awful; incredibly windy and some rain. The roads were like mirrors the following days. My grandparents came on the 25th and they had a really good time. My food came out great (thanks for asking Angie!). Santa was very good to us; I was particularly happy with the two sweaters I gave DH. It showed me that I've really learned to know him and his tastes; the sweaters were the right sizes and right on target, he really liked the style. I have been enjoying a really nice book my husband gave me. It's about midwives in 1850 in Montreal. It was written by a historian and there are 3 tomes of some 700 pages each. The tone is very feminist at times. I really like to learn about how life was like in the city I live in. Geez, the main characters lived a few streets away from where I work! We had two dentist apts; the first for a check-up and the second for one cavity each. It was a bit funny because on the first apt, the technician was beginning to show serious signs of food poisoning. DH said that he could see her trying not to heave right above his face! The poor girl! She left right after she was finished with him, and I had my teeth cleaned by the dentist herself. Then my sister paid us a visit and we had a really good time, shopping, cooking and chatting. I get along so well with her. We went to Quebec city to visit my family. Not really fun; we had a few fights and before we left, we had a long and very emotional hollywood-like discussion. My father, his wife, my sisters and I, we all cried profusely at some point. Sometimes, when the weather is really too heavy and humid, a good thunderstorm clears the skies right up... I think what happened was for the best, even if we can't solve some issues that are rooted far too deep in the past. We'll see how things evolve from now on. This episode brought DH and I closer and I could really feel he was right by my side through all this, it was great and comforting.
What about you sweetie? And you, Angie? And you, Miracle? And all the others? How was Xmas? Carolyn, you must be counting the days until you leave for Prague! *hugs*
Love,
Sophie
Yup, we posted at the same time! I had a great Xmas. On the 24th, we had dinner with friends; they gave us a last minute invitation. We had a great time, but the weather was awful; incredibly windy and some rain. The roads were like mirrors the following days. My grandparents came on the 25th and they had a really good time. My food came out great (thanks for asking Angie!). Santa was very good to us; I was particularly happy with the two sweaters I gave DH. It showed me that I've really learned to know him and his tastes; the sweaters were the right sizes and right on target, he really liked the style. I have been enjoying a really nice book my husband gave me. It's about midwives in 1850 in Montreal. It was written by a historian and there are 3 tomes of some 700 pages each. The tone is very feminist at times. I really like to learn about how life was like in the city I live in. Geez, the main characters lived a few streets away from where I work! We had two dentist apts; the first for a check-up and the second for one cavity each. It was a bit funny because on the first apt, the technician was beginning to show serious signs of food poisoning. DH said that he could see her trying not to heave right above his face! The poor girl! She left right after she was finished with him, and I had my teeth cleaned by the dentist herself. Then my sister paid us a visit and we had a really good time, shopping, cooking and chatting. I get along so well with her. We went to Quebec city to visit my family. Not really fun; we had a few fights and before we left, we had a long and very emotional hollywood-like discussion. My father, his wife, my sisters and I, we all cried profusely at some point. Sometimes, when the weather is really too heavy and humid, a good thunderstorm clears the skies right up... I think what happened was for the best, even if we can't solve some issues that are rooted far too deep in the past. We'll see how things evolve from now on. This episode brought DH and I closer and I could really feel he was right by my side through all this, it was great and comforting.
What about you sweetie? And you, Angie? And you, Miracle? And all the others? How was Xmas? Carolyn, you must be counting the days until you leave for Prague! *hugs*
Love,
Sophie
1st and 2nd IVF = BFN 1st FET BFP! m/c at 7 weeks. 2nd FET BFP! 3rd FET BFN
Now let's spend the rest of our lives having fun together!
Now let's spend the rest of our lives having fun together!
Becky thats a lovley idea to plant something for your baby and then every time it flowers you can think of your beautiful baby its good that you can come and tell us what you are going through has we are all here for you whatever you want to say i agree with all these other ladies in what the have all said and please take 1 day at a time i so wish that there was something i could do to take away all your pain now but know theres nothing noone can do
thinking of you and brain
lots of love Rachel x x x
thinking of you and brain
lots of love Rachel x x x
after 8 yrs of trying 2failed ivf 1 m/c and 2 miracles
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wishfull27
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 1580
- Joined: Mon Jul 23, 2007 8:01 pm
- Location: UK
Afterrnoon ladies
where is everyone - I am working from home today and the laptop is about to go out of the window - its doing my head in our accounts package keeps jamming and then kicking me off - relaly helpful since meant to be doing accounts review
Please someone come and talk to me and keep me sane
And just found out DH has got to go to Saudi with work for 2 weeks and will be aay for Valentines
speak soon
carolyn xxxx
where is everyone - I am working from home today and the laptop is about to go out of the window - its doing my head in our accounts package keeps jamming and then kicking me off - relaly helpful since meant to be doing accounts review
Please someone come and talk to me and keep me sane
And just found out DH has got to go to Saudi with work for 2 weeks and will be aay for Valentines
speak soon
carolyn xxxx
IVF 4 BFP
-
Welshgirl38
- Valued Contributor
- Posts: 1653
- Joined: Mon Aug 21, 2006 12:46 pm
Hi Ladies,
Well i got a scan today, and yes - everything is out ... feels like my heart is gonna break all over again today! When we got there the Dr asked me how i was, i said ok considering ... she didnt know i had already miscarried until i told her that everything was out - and she scanned me - said that yes the sac had come out at some point!!!!
I didnt tell her that i held in my the palm of my hand, and that i saw everything - i saw what a woman who is desperate for a child should never see! I didnt tell her i had buried it and planted a special plant which will bloom every year ... i didnt want her to know that .... thats between DH and i (and u ladies of course) i wasnt sure if she would understand this or not so i choose to let her keep saying, when the sac came away at some point in the last week!
I felt like saying - it wasnt just a sac - it was our baby. i know they have to be careful what they say, and are just going by terms they have to ... but when ur sat there listening to it ... it hurts!
Little did she know that i could tell her the date and the time and the minute it happened ... not much point, its gone and there is nothing i can do about it
I felt ok when i came out of the clinic ... felt it was like closure, and now we must move fwd - but driving home, looking up into a beautiful clear blue sky, the sun was beaming and as we were passing the countryside i cried and cried again, why, why did this have to happen .... we loved this baby so much. Why does the world carry on when ours has come to an abrupt stop
You know, we found out on 1st Dec that we were pg, and found out on 30th of the same mth we had lost it ... just 30 days - i wish i could get those 30 days back - i wud give anything for those days again ...
She told me at clinic that the worst is over - just a little blood left to come out - my lining is 7mm, so all out and gone ... i just cant belive its over ladies ... im having a bad half hour and im sorry but i have to vent it somewhere ....
Why???????? Why???????? WHY??????????????
Well i got a scan today, and yes - everything is out
... feels like my heart is gonna break all over again today! When we got there the Dr asked me how i was, i said ok considering ... she didnt know i had already miscarried until i told her that everything was out - and she scanned me - said that yes the sac had come out at some point!!!!I didnt tell her that i held in my the palm of my hand, and that i saw everything - i saw what a woman who is desperate for a child should never see!
I didnt tell her i had buried it and planted a special plant which will bloom every year ... i didnt want her to know that .... thats between DH and i (and u ladies of course) i wasnt sure if she would understand this or not so i choose to let her keep saying, when the sac came away at some point in the last week! I felt like saying - it wasnt just a sac - it was our baby. i know they have to be careful what they say, and are just going by terms they have to ... but when ur sat there listening to it ... it hurts!
Little did she know that i could tell her the date and the time and the minute it happened ... not much point, its gone and there is nothing i can do about it
I felt ok when i came out of the clinic ... felt it was like closure, and now we must move fwd - but driving home, looking up into a beautiful clear blue sky, the sun was beaming and as we were passing the countryside i cried and cried again, why, why did this have to happen .... we loved this baby so much. Why does the world carry on when ours has come to an abrupt stop
You know, we found out on 1st Dec that we were pg, and found out on 30th of the same mth we had lost it ... just 30 days - i wish i could get those 30 days back - i wud give anything for those days again ...
She told me at clinic that the worst is over - just a little blood left to come out - my lining is 7mm, so all out and gone ... i just cant belive its over ladies ... im having a bad half hour and im sorry but i have to vent it somewhere ....
Why???????? Why???????? WHY??????????????
1 IVF=BFN 2 IVF=BFN 3 IVF=BFP
m/c @ 8 wks 4 IVF=BFNWe must now let go of the life we had planned, to live the life waiting for us..
Adoption course starts March 19th