Test Results

DonnaFi · Post by **DonnaFi** » Sun Sep 21, 2003 3:56 pm

Just thought I would let you know that I tested on Friday and unfortunately it isn't to be this time. It isn't totally unexpected, but still upsetting all the same. I am really sorry for not writing sooner, but I have been off spending some well needed qualtiy time with DH. Although I do feel a bit better now, I cannot believe that it hasn't worked. I mean, we all know that there is a real chance that it might not, but doubt is really beginning to set in whether it will work in the future. I know this is only my second attempt at IVF, but I am worried that this attempt has mirrored the last time exactly (eg. great embryos, but AF arrived after 7 days after ET). Why should the next time, or the time after that be any different. Sorry to sound so negative, but I am really frightened that it may never work. To make matters worse, DH is devestated (much more than the last time), and although he is trying to put on a brave face for me, I feel so bloody guilty! Good luck to everyone either on their 2WW or those who are cycling at the moment. Love and Hugs Donna XXX

Kat · Post by **Kat** » Sun Sep 21, 2003 4:27 pm

Donna, I was really sorry to read your post. I know nothing I can say will make you feel better, but take as much time as you need to be with your DH and help each other come to terms with your result. There are so many people here who know what you are going through and our thoughts are with you, it's a scary thing, this IVF business, and you're already stronger for what you've been through. Good luck & lots of love Kat xx

july ann · Post by **july ann** » Sun Sep 21, 2003 5:35 pm

hi donna so sorry to hear your new's. i now how you feel you just get to the stage were you think when is this going to work.i felt like you but here i'am again on my 3 go and you feel you have got this far maybe it will work next time. I think it is harder to stop than to keep going.glad to see that you and dh have had some time together and once all those drugs are out of your body you will start to feel better. will be thinking of you july ann

Nikola · Post by **Nikola** » Sun Sep 21, 2003 7:11 pm

hello donna I sent you a message on another thread ("for donna") to let you know I was thinking of you. I'm so sorry to hear it hastn't worked. Even though you suspected it would be negative, it doesn't help, does it. Of course you are to feel devasted and so will your dh. I'm sure he wouldn't want you to feel guilty for his grief. You are both entitled to grieve but neither of you are to blame. You should make sure you keep talking to each other and neither one of you feel you are shouldering all the blame. You are in it together! When you go to your review consultation, mention that you are concerned that this cycle mirrored your first and ask if there is anything you could do differently next time. Perhaps they could give you a different drug regime or something. I don't know much about it but I know there are lots of other tests which you might want to think about e.g. chromosome tests and nk cells test. Ask your consultant. Hopefully when you've had time to be consider everything you'll be back on here and fighting to go. We#ll all be here for you! Try to take some special time to be together in the meantime. lots of love nikola.xx

JackieT · Post by **JackieT** » Sun Sep 21, 2003 9:40 pm

hi donna so sorry to hear your news, you must be feeling so raw right now. i know theres nothing i can say to make you fel any better,but i do hope once the drugs start to come out of your system you will think of going again. we all have to believe it has to work sometime for us or what would be the point of all of this? you will have your time. big hug to you and DH love jackieT xx

bubblymichelle · Post by **bubblymichelle** » Mon Sep 22, 2003 7:25 am

Hi Donna I am so sorry to read that you got a negative again. I do feel for yourself & DH it must be so upsetting. Please take as much time as you need with DH and this will help you become stronger together. Words fail me because I really can't say anymore then I am sorry but am thinking about you. Love Shell. xx

Traci · Post by **Traci** » Mon Sep 22, 2003 7:27 am

Donna Im so sorry

it wasnt your turn and I fully understand how you are feeling , you somehow exept that the first one would be lucky but the second I feel is definately harder to come to terms with. But they do say that your chances increase the more times you have it done I think its 50% on the third try. you are right to spend lots of time with DH I suppose they worry how we will cope with it more than themselves and then when its here to deal with they surprise themselves on how they cope . Does that make sence!!! anyway we are here for you chick and you will know when the time is right to start again. {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} Trace x

SJ BROWN · Post by **SJ BROWN** » Mon Sep 22, 2003 8:03 am

Hi Donna Just wanted you to know I am thinking of you... Like the others say, spend some quality time with your husband and I really hope you find the strength to cycle again, 33d time lucky for you!! Sarah xx

Di · Post by Di » Mon Sep 22, 2003 9:28 am

Hi Donna, So sorry to hear its not worked for you this time! I know you thought it hadn't but its still awful when its confirmed! Just because it hasn't worked the first twice doesn't mean that it won't ever work - It took me til 6th attempt to get a + and then its just worked on my 9th! I've found that the fallout afetr a failed treatment is as much of a rollercoaster of emotions as the treatment itself - not wanting to ever do a treatment again and feeling total despair to then looking to another tmt and the hope building! The Dr at Edinburgh told me that it takes couples on average 6 months to conceive so to think of that as 6 cycles! Some will get pregnant before the 6 and some - like me will take longer! Hope my waffling has helped, Be good to yourself and take time with DH. Di

kathryn · Post by **kathryn** » Mon Sep 22, 2003 12:37 pm

hello donna, Im so sorry it was bad news for you. As the other girls have said even if you expect a -, it doesnt make it any easier when its confirmed. I really feel for you both, take care of each other kathryn x

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