I am at a turning point in my ICSI treatment and need some guidance!!
Every time I visit the boards, someone I knew/cycled with has given birth (and I am delighted for them), but it's the never ending story for me.
I started ICSI in Ocotber 2002 (ttc since 1999), and have had three cycles - number one was successful but I unfortunately mis-carried at 9weeks (no longer a heartbeat on the 9 week scan). Since then I have had two failed cycles. Each time less eggs (10, 7, 4) and now I am at a total loss as to where to go next.
Should I change clinics for one last go? Should I stay where I am - they do after all know all about me?!
Has anyone got any success stories from staying/changing clinics? I would be grateful if you share them with me. I am really feeling now that this is never going to happen for us, and I don't think I can face up to the possibility of never having a child. I feel this decision of whether to change clinics or stay at my clinic is really important as this is definitely our last go - and I need to make the right decision. I'm getting all worked up about what to do..!!!
I'm sorry about your miscarriage and failed cycles. Like you, I've been around a while (5 IVF/ICSI cycles since Jan 2002 and one FET), and many friends I've made cycling are now PG or have had their babies. I'm delighted for each and everyone one of them - but you do start to wonder why it hasn't happened yet for you. And the decisions do all get much more difficult the further along the road you go, particularly when you've decided "this is it, this'll be my last go" - you want to do absolutely everything so that you know you've done your best to make it work.
Personally, I've stuck with my clinic (given my lack of success, perhaps this was the wrong decision!). But I've always felt that I couldn't get more thorough treatment anywhere else, they've got to know me and me to know them, and, while I think follow up appointments are, by definition, disappointing, they've always suggested something new to try. I guess the question for you is whether you think your clinic are doing everything they can? Have you talked to them about the reducing number of eggs, and why that is, and what they can do to make sure there are more eggs? Are you happy with what they're telling you? There's nothing to stop you going to talk to one or two other clinics and seeing how you feel about them before making a final decision about staying or moving.
Tina
I too am in the same boat , but I changed clinics cause I felt they gave up on me and their answers to my questions wasnt what I wanted to hear, I would stick at the same clinic unless you are unhappy , again ask the questions RE: eggs perhaps up your dose or perhaps give it a longer break!!! or Perhaps oh I dont know , this is how we get isnt it ! the only thing I would make sure is that you have been tested for implantation , My clinic advised me to do this and some clinics charge £575 but my doctor carried them out and it didnt cost a penny I was very lucky but it ruled out clotting etc etc which put my mind at rest.
Have you tried acupuncture during TMT? this time I have so who knows I am really sceptable about these different things but I really feel the benefit when I have been and I hope that it has helped.
Good luck on your decition, its tough isnt it
tina, im so sorry for how u are feeling, it is truly heartbreaking i know.
it is so difficult to make decisions u just go round and round in circles,
have u had your follow up appointement, if not before u go u must
try and write down all the questions u want to ask, go thru all
the posts on hear, read about all the test other girls have had and ask
your clinic about them and if u dont get a satifactory answer then there
is no harm in contacting other clinics even just to hear there views.
i know its difficult as we are so much in their hands, but there are some
places that do try different ideas, as trace said have they tested u for
implantation, have they suggest asprin, etc.
I was tested for NK cells (killer cells) and i was boder line so i was
put on steroids after ET.
RE your reducing eggs, have they tried different medication, sometimes
that helps. (mind u it just takes one little fighter).
I did change clinics after my 3rd -itve and went to the lister, and they
were honest with me re my chances due to my age (43) but i am now
one of their stats. as i finally got my +ive in jan 04, to be honest i
dont know if was due to changing clinics, accupunture, or supplements
i was taking, but i gave it everything. I know its hard but try and stay postive. Keep in touch. alisonn
it might be worthwhile considering having a consultation with another clinic, even if just to make comparisons. i know it costs yet more money but it might help you decide whether to stay or go from your current clinic. it doesn't mean you have to switch.
certainly ask about your eggs. is there anything that could be causing the reduced number. is the drug protocol right for you, is the dosage high enough? what's your ovarian reserve like? etc.
good luck with your decision. let us know what you'll do.
Thanks so much for replying - you keep going round and round and it helps to just get someone else's perspective.
Alison - I think we cycled together on FF in March - and both got negatives. We were in the same black hole! At least I hope that's you!
I am overall happy with my clinic, but everytime I take some new idea to them, they always say 'nothing's proven'. And I believe that actually, but sometimes even though there's no proof, things work! I keep going tround and round on this, and I am really not sure what's best.
Traci - I know I don't post on here very often but I have followed your battle, and I admire your strength to continue. Good luck this cycle with donor. I hope it's the one for you.
I haven't had the implantation test - not even heard of it. What should I be asking for?! Is it a blood test? I am going to try accupuncture this time - but isn't it expensive - I think it's going to add another £500 to the cost of treatment - but if it works, who cares?!
Alisonn - congratulations I am delighted you finally have a positive.
NK cells - I am thinking of having this tested the Lister - I have contacted them and I can have it done even if I don't transfer. I asked my clinic about it, and they said 'no proof' so there you go - still I will try it this time.
Phil - I know you're on the other side too - congrats to you.
I had a consultation at the ARGC, and despite their fantastic success rates, I disliked their attitude totally. I was all fired up to transfer to them for my last treatment and they totally put me off. It was like a shopping list of extras that put the cost upto 7k. I didn't get any sense of trust from them. On ovarian reserve - I have a highish fsh (9.9) for my age, but they say 'not a problem'. I haven't had the reserve tested though - who would do that? They changed my drugs dose from 100 to 150 puregon last time. I have always been on a day 2 protocol (start injecting buserelin on day 2 of AF) - everyone else seems to be on day 21. The clinic said they would up the drugs and change the protocol to day 21 this time. And put back three embryos.
Anyway, it's such a minefield and I feel such a weight about making this decision - I'll let you know what I decide (if I ever do).
Thanks again for your help - I really appreciate it.
