Tracey and Sophie

[Dagny]

Tracey

Hiya, I'm not sure when you get back but suspect it's this weekend. Did you have a good time all 4 of you . It's been very quiet on this side since you have been away.

I got my AF at the Duran Duran concert Typical Funnily enough I thought when I used to go to their concerts all those years ago I hadn't even started my periods Late starter Still, the concert was great. My ears were ringing like mad the next day though.

David and I went to see Mr B my consultant on Friday and he said I can start again after my next AF. So it looks likely to be June. Katelyn would have been due on June 19th so maybe it will give me something to focus on It's likely that it will be funded as well. We were not expecting that at all and when I asked how long we had to wait he said there was no waiting time hence starting our treatment in June

We went to look at headstones yesterday too. We are limited as to what we can have as there are strict rules in the graveyard. The vicar has to agree with what we choose. We want something fairly simple anyway with her handprints and footprints engraved on the stone which they said they can do.

We are looking forward to our holiday. I have been out getting some bits and bobs for it and realised my comfort eating has to stop!! I have started to put on quite a few pounds which shows when I put a bikini on

What about Nikola's wonderful news????? two girls just like you Just think of the shopping trips you can all do in a few years time - OMG!! Seriously though I am so wrapped that they arrived safely and that they are doing well in SCBU. I will have to go and buy them a little pressie each now to send them. Chris sounds ever the doting Daddy, bless him.

Sophie - Hello you, How are things going?? Have you had anymore scans?? I hope so for your sake at least. I can't remember if you said are going to find out the sexes or not. When is your due date?

I hope you had a good Easter and look forward to hearing from you soon.

Love Dagny xkx

[Tracey S]

Here I am my special friend

Fancy having them whilst I was away - told her to cross her legs - honestly!The hols were fab and very relaxing - I am rather brown but look like a brown M& M on legs - honestly! I have some photos of the twins - have you any - would you like me to send them - now have to go shopping again - omg - 4 girls - yikes!
Great news re June - won;t be long and you can at least feel you are doing something - as for the weight - mmmmmmmm know the feeling - I was the same after Oliver - never lost it - just roll it on to the next lot.
I have missed you loads - can't tell you.
Catch you later - massive hug to you and Gabbie sends several licks and some strong nibbles
Love
Tracey
xxx

[Dagny]

Hello and welcome back my friend.

I really did miss you whilst you were sunning yourself and your bump. It's my turn next, can't wait It was fairly quiet on the boards as well except for the news of the year - Nikola and her very exciting news. Hooray

I am over the moon that they are all safe sound and happy. Chris sent me some photos yesterday of Nikola, Florrie and Milly. They are sooooo small - bless 'em Nikola looked knackered but relieved I think. She looked nothing like I had imagined but then again my brothers ex was called Nicola and I had a picture of her in my mind.

Traci sent me a photo of her on her wedding day. She looked lovely. All I need is a photo of you now so I can put a face to the name. I will send you one of me but it is with my little bump back in January. It's the only one of me on the laptop at the moment.

I am so pleased that I have been given the go ahead with the next treatment. We probably won't tell many people when we start as I told so many in the last 3 and now feel I would prefer not to have all the phone calls and texts. It might sound ungrateful as everyone is so supportive but I feel a bit preassured to talk about it and put on a brave face most of the time. It will be hard as so many are asking us already. I just tell them we will do it when I feel ready and it could be quite some time.

Hope you are catching up with everyone elses news on the site, as well as doing your shopping, washing and work

Sophie is very quiet again. She's not as obsessed as we are at posting on here

Take care

Love Dagny xkx

[Tracey S]

Dagny

Collecting piccies hey? Don;t worry about not telling people - I didn't - kept it well quiet as did not want the pressure - only Nik and Helen S knew and Ian's boss and that was it.
I think you are doing the right thing and you have to do what is right for you - how is David and the car? oh and next door?
Love
Tracey
xxx

[Dagny]

Hiya

Got your piccies. They are all lovely. You look like a lovely couple and Gabbie is super. Don't you wish they stayed puppies for longer??

David is fine and working very hard as usual. He will be worried about leaving his business for a week but he'll be leaving it in good hands.

The car is better now. I would like to get a new one but it will have to wait a while. I have a personal number plate 'D4GNY' how cool is that?? We got it at auction a few years ago. Changing it to other cars costs quite a bit so it's best not to change cars too much.

As for next door - He is still 'absent' for want of a better word although he comes back occasionally to see the kids. He's such a to$$er. Excuse my french but I have nothing nice to say about him.

How's your day been?? Did you get all your chores done?

My day has been wasted and I have done nothing productive. Feel a bit down as well. I just miss Katelyn so much.

Love Dagny xkx

[Tracey S]

Sorry to hear you had a bad day Dagny - how are you today. Of course you miss Katelyn - look at it this way - it is sunny here - is it sunny there? go out and talk to her and think of her making your life sunnier and this is her way of showing you. Holiday soon and I am sure it will do you both good - Katelyn will go with you in spirit and hopefully when you get back you will feel more able to face the next hurdles.

As for TOSSER next door - blimey what a plank - she is better off without him.

As for me - got some washing done and tried to catch up on here. Chris sent me some more piccies of Nik as I only had her unconsious and some of the twins on tubes - these are super! She does look knackered though. He reckons they are kicking her out on Friday - how awful!

WEll more washing to do- oh and some work!
Love
Tracey
xxx

[Dagny]

Hello Mate

I have been out buying a load for holiday. I spent £60 in Boots and it was a bit of make-up and sun cream, what a rip off David will go spare when he sees what I have bought (clothes ) I have got him a couple of shirts as well so he should be pleased Mmmmmm??

My day is pretty much like yesterday. Very weepy and down. This holiday is coming just at the right time. I am going through the second phase of grief. It's quite complicated but my councellor gave me some info on what to expect as time moves on. I never knew that grief could be so tireing. I feel exhausted a lot of the time and my body aches inside and out

I ordered Katelyn's temporary cross this afternoon. We can't have a headstone for at least 6 months so this cross will be there until we can have a stone up there. It costs £65 But it's worth every penny. It will be nice to have something with her name on up there for now to recognise it's her grave. I am collecting it tomorrow afternoon. My best friend will visit her grave while we are away which I think is a lovely gesture. She just said she would go without me asking her. She knows how important it is that someone is visiting her. Her baby is due in a few weeks so I hope she doesn't go into labour whilst we are away Our babies were going to be friends and grow up together It's amazing how things change.

I can't believe Nik is being kicked out on Friday. How far do they live from the hospital? It will be awful for her to leave Florrie and Milly every day.

How is your day going?? Are the girls behaving themselves? I bet you can't wait to meet N & C's girls.


Love Dagny xkx

[Tracey S]

Oh Dagny poor you. The second stage of grief I found the most exhausting too - just wiped me out and it was all I could do just to have a shower! I went to Italy then with Ian and this helped me get out of it - just walking and talking and eating and well you know.......... time together out of the country. It was just the ticket and I hope it is for you too. A cross is a start for little Katelyn and it will be a marker as you say. How lovely of your friend - it must be so hard for you as she is pg but mind you not easy for her - she sounds wonderful to me.
The girls seem to have shoved my diaphragm up to my chin and it feels very bruised - I am feeling a bit out of sorts today - can't put my finger on it - just sort of run over by a bus feeling.

Can't wait to see the girls - had another mail off Chris with a Nik update - she does text me several times a day and all well. Will come out Friday if she is well - they live 10 mins away but she won;t be able to drive and Chris is still at work so he can take a month off when they are out. They have friends staying this weekend so should take her mind off it all.

Catch you later and don;t worry about David and the money - I do the same at Boots and then buy Ian some shirts - not that he is in to clothes really at all! Mind you Boots is such a rip off these days.
Take care and chin up
Love
Tracey
xxx

[Dagny]

Hi Mate

Sorry you are feeling out of sorts today. Hormones I suspect There are three of you kicking them about your body.

Did Nikola have to have a transfusion?? Have you made plans to visit her and the girls soon?

I am off to collect Katelyn's cross soon. We will put it up there later today. I will have to start packing I think as it won't do it it's self

It is difficult for my friend who is PG. She had to tell me she was PG the first time whan I was just about to have EC on my first treatment. Then when she got PG this time and then I did we were so excited as we always used to talk about going shopping with our babies and pushing pushchairs together to the park etc. It's such pants Every milestone her baby has I will always think that Katelyn should be at that stage too.

Hope you feel a bit better soon. Did you get my photos of Katelyn?

Love Dagny xkx

PS Where is Sophie????????????????????

[Tracey S]

Dagny

I am ok just a bit battered - more worried about you and the photos - where are they - have not got - must be in cyber space somewhere - bet Oliver and KAtelyn and checking them first and then laughing their socks off about us two ninnies!!!!

Good luck with the cross - this won't be an easy one I know for you hun and I am sure tears will be shed - don't worry just go with the flow.
Grit your teeth and get packing - the sooner it's done.

As for Nik - she has avoided the blood transfusion so far and I think if she really needed it then they would make her - I am trying to pursuade her. No plans yet to see her - she has friend this weekend then parents going up and we have every other weekend with Rachel and Katherine - you know what it's like!
I will text you if anything major happens and will miss you heaps of course - is it one week? Loads of love ok and catch you later.
Don't know where Sophie has gone - work and life probably
Love
Tracey
xxx

[sophie_rashid]

hi you two , i've been off work all last week so dont tend to login as when i do i also start looking at lots of different web sites and then start getting paranoid again . My sister is here from the States with her 3 girls 4, 3 and 1 yr old , she gets pregnant just thinking about it ! so its chaos but fun at least it makes the time go past quicker . I had an antenatal appt last week and also had a scan , decided not to have the nuchal scan becuase i felt it would throw up further worry for me especially as i would not go for an amnio or termination, so midwife did a quick scan , i couldnt tell much . it didnt even occur to me to ask the sex of the babies and i know i should be positive but by not knowing its less real .I have an appt every two weeks and need to see a heartbeat but its a horrible moment lying on the couch waiting for her to do the scan as i am always reminded of the last scan i had with my baby girl ( named her jannat by the way which is a islamic word for paradise we had not chosen a name but it came to my husband when he had to go and register the stillbirth ) I'm now 12w5d now and feel okay apart from occassional retching and feeling uncomfortable lying down . I would love to go on holiday but now am worried about flying so will do a UK break when (if) weather picks up !

Anyway back to work - take care Sophie

[Dagny]

Hey Sophie

Nice to see you back again. Jannat is a lovely name, very unusual. I can imagine having scans will bring terrible memories back to you. I know Tracey was petrified of her 20 week scan with the twins.

It's great that you are doing well and that the babies are growing and getting bigger. Did they tell you what size they are now? Will you ask about the sex at the next scan? I will find out as soon as I can next time I am PG.

My Mum and Dad have some lovely holiday lets in Devon if you are interested. Mates rates!!!! Beautiful scenery and very quiet. The weather should get better soon.

Have fun with your sister and her children.

Love Dagny xkx

[Tracey S]

Sophie

Glad to see you back and I know what the worry is like - I mean can't tell you not to when I did!!! I have just been on a flight and no problems there but again it's your choice of course. like Dagny says what a lovely name. I think you have made the right choice for you re the scan and nuchal etc. WEll done! Good luck with the next scan but as each one goes by it's better...........
Dagny - Devon hey - Ian and I would like to go there in September we thought - well we will see.
HAve a lovely holiday honey and miss you loads
Love
Tracey
xxx

[Dagny]

Oh God it's just gone midnight and I still haven't finished packing. We are leaving at 6am in the morning

I HATE PACKING

I will send you some info on my Mum and Dads place when I get back.

I'll miss you Send my love to Nikola.

Love Dagny xkx

[Dagny]

Hello

Well I am back and brown but not entirely relaxed. David had a nasty accident and spent the whole holiday on pain killers and bandaged up all over his back I really thought he had killed himself and was beside myself with fright and am now having nightmares re-living the accident which happened right before my eyes. I put the full story on the General Forum. He is OK now but I am still a bit shaken up.

I did miss you a lot while I was away and catching up on here is a nightmare. It's so good to see Nikola back on line although it will be a while before she can post a bit more. Spending all the time at the hospital must be so tireing for her and Chris. I had a look at the web site with the pictures of the girls on, they are absolutely GORGEOUS! She is so lucky to have them and she looks it too. So happy and content. I am so pleased for both of them.

Tracey I am so glad your 25 week scan went well and that it looks like you can have a natural birth. The girls are obviously doing well and I bet it's a relief for you each time you see them thriving on the scanner.

Great news regarding Traci's eggs isn't it? I am so hoping thet get a good fertilisation rate. She so deserves this she really does.

I am chomping at the bit to get going again but have to wait for another AF before they do my bloods and then hopefully off we go. I am worried too that something will go wrong and I will have another hurdle to get over. I spend so long looking for problems, I am such a worry wort.

My friend went to Katelyn's grave 3 times while we were away and put some flowers on the grave on Monday when it was her 2 month anniversary. She is so thoughtful and her little boy (2yrs) was stroking the cross and saying 'Baby Katelyn, baby Katelyn' and 'Go away horried rabbits'! Bless him

Oh well must go as I have been on here for hours and I have done nothing else today. So much washing and unpacking - here we go again!!!!!

Take care

Love Dagny xkx