help - where's af

[jane]

I am desperately wanting to start my next cycle (a frozen go) but my bloody af won't come. Since my failed ivf in March I have had one clear cycle (af arrived on day 32) but I am on day 42 today with no sign of af at all. Where is it?. I've spent a fortune on hpt's as keep onthinking a miracle has happened and I'm pg but NO - they are always -ive (just to give me more kicks in the teeth).
I just want to get started again ... I am so desperate to be pg and to get back on treatment. I can't stand all this waiting. Feeling so crap about everything. How do you guys pull yourselves through the low times. I just want to curl up and sleep and not see anyone, especially as everyone I know is bloody pg.
Soory to be so miserable, I'm really struggling. Might even arrange counselling. Do we have to pay for counselling?
from Sophie-Jane

[Bronagh]

I've read many things about af not coming ,it sounds that your very stressed somebody suggested good old fashion SEX seems to do the trick.

BY law all fertility clinics in the UK have to provide counselling and a way for you to acces it without going directly through your clinic- it maybe just a seperate telephone number . At our clinic its free maybe its the same everywhere but I really think you should have a go. Whe things are not moveing its so frustrating, when I got like that I'd have a little crythen go and do something that would take my mind of it, could be the garden going for a walk a swim a sauna anything to distract me but I'd also writ e it down. Got myself a diary just so there was someplace to pour all those feelings and get them off my chest.

Look after yourself give yourself a hug and inquire about the counselling.

x
Bro

[DebraP]

Sophie-Jane....sorry AF isn't playing fair with you. Who needs this cr*p? Like Bro, I also started writing things down. I tried to remember to do it when I felt 'up' too so that I could see it wasn't always down times.

I know exactly what you mean about everyone being pg. I had friends over today and one is 4m pg, another in the room mc'd same week as me in March and would have also been 4m. All seems too hard. The pg friend was over the moon about her scan yesterday and finding out the gender. I am very, very happy for her but it was still really difficult.

I hope AF arrives really, really soon and you can get started on tmt again.

love, Debra.

[bina]

Hi Jane,
Hope you're bearing up OK! It's so frustrating when your body plays tricks on you...
Just thought I share with you that I (as a 'last resort' sort of thing) went for some counselling just before my first IVF cycle. I got so stressed about absolutely everything in my life: work (trying to hide the treatment, etc PLUS the actual stress of the job), home life (fretting over success/failure of treatment, anxiety, etc), friends (especially those with kids or pg ones) etc etc that I thought it can't do any harm really. I have to admit I was quite doubtful it would do any good, because I'm not really into this 'over-analysing' every single notion of one's life.
But the woman was brilliant. Totally non-threatening, great listening and questioning skills and just got me to understand and see things about myself within a very short period of time (only went three times). She also totally left it up to me whether and when I wanted to see her again, which was really helpful.
At my clinic they offer stress counselling and 'proper' IVF-counselling. I went for the former, which was just right, because we hardly talked about IVF and just concentrated on anything going on in my life.
Hope this makes sense and helps in any way for you to reach a decision re: counselling!
Best of luck and wishing you heaps of patience to cope with the time to come!
Love,
bina

[Kel]

Hi Sophie-Jane,

Just wanted to see how you are doing?? Hope things are on the move for you??
Kel x