I am so glad we can all share our experiences with each other.
Tina,
I can understand how difficult it can be when in-laws interfere and try to take over our lives. What I always try and remind my self is "I can not change them as they are so set in their ways". The only thing I can do is to change my behaviour and not let them rule our lives. If they suggest something, I now just say that DH and I will need to think about it and we do not give a conclusive answer. This way, they know that we will only do what ever we want to do. They get tired and give up sometimes. I also do not diclose too much information. I tell them about things after the event so that they can not dwell on issues. It is our life, so we must try and be in control.
You are lucky that you are on the other side of the world. My cousin who is also going through similar issues with in laws, just puts the answering phone on when she knows her in -laws from India call. This way, she does not get stressed when they speak to her and say hurtful things.
One thing we can learn from all of this is, we must never be like our MILs when it is our turn to be MILs. We know what it feels like and also experienced how hurtful words can be. So, there is a positive from all of these experiences.
I see you are also starting acupunture. I hear this really helps, I am sure this will also helps us in our journey to be successful with fertility treatment.
Chel,
Yes, I think we have similar issues with relations. I too try and avoid them, this way I do not get so stressed. If I do meet them, I always tell them that we like to travel and see the world or that I am concentrating on my career.
I too work in a stressful environment as a Finance manager and am doing higher studies. I used to work long hours but forece myself not to any more. I realised recently that stress has a lot to do with how your body reacts to fertility mediaction. I feel I miss period because of stress. Apparently you can also get infections, headaches etc because of stress which can also have a direct impact on our fertility. We must try and take it easy and be as relaxed as possible. I am taking time off when I am on my 2WW so that my body has no tensions. Hopefully, this should help me to get pregnant this time. I understand acupunture also prepares your body for the embryos. Fingers crossed, everything should go well the next time for all of us.
Wishing you loads of good luck and PMA.
Love,
Sita
" thread! I take full responsibility!
and get very emotional.But in front of myMIL I am opposite.I hesitate to do all that fearing what the consequences will be.That';s what holds me back.She is not one to keep quiet.i f I say something she will yell and cry in front of her son and daughters.I feel I will be totally alone against all of them with no support.My dh also told me if she says anything to her,speak back.No NEED to bear anything.I think she uses the fact that I am submissive to her advantage.So I have to change.Next time I got to Inida I will either bring all my gold here or put it in my name even if they don't like it.My inlaws let me take gold from there whenever I want,but it so wierd as each time my FIL will come with me like a body guard.I don't have any freedon.They always will know if I want to take or put anything.My dh tells me "what difference is it if it is in their locker or mine." I get so irritated.I have written many letters to dh as I can write my feelings clearly without getting crazy.He does try ti understand a lot ,but also doesn't want to hurt his parents in any way.He is also like me in some ways.He hesitates to speak back to people if they say something.We both need to change.MY inlaws knew about the first ivf as it was in their place,but don't know about the 2nd ivf.If they knew I'm sure they'll say there must be something wrong with her for it not to work!