Awaiting Treatment

[PMApsy]

Morning guys,

Lee,
Well, it's official now, so sorry to hear about your BFN and the end of the IVF journey. Your attitude seems incredibly healthy to me, and I'm sure you will recover from this, all in good time. You're an amazing woman with lots of inner resources that will be very helpful over the next few weeks and months. I hope with all my heart that DH and you enjoy a nice vacation together that brings you closer. You've sure earned it. I'm also pleased to know that you won't be having foster kids until the end of April, you need that break dearest. Please do come back whenever you feel like it just to say hi and give us news about you; you know you'll be missed around here sweetheart. With all my heart, I give you a big hug!!!

Angie,
Great to see you girlie! Hehehehe don't lose that energy baby! Hey, that's amazing news about upper management! Woohoo! Time to use that rainbow!

Miracle,
Hi darling! Good news about the job, but ack about the insomnia! Any idea what might be causing it? Have you considered trying acupuncture tmts? Or yoga classes? That could help you too! Sex wouldn't hurt either, endorphines are good for relaxation! I hope it gets better real soon sweetie... any news about your friend? Oh,and don't worry, no sign of labor coming any time soon in my case.

Carolyn,
Gah, hate those hot flashes!!! I had only one once during tmt and acupuncture zapped it so it never came back. You have all my sympathy sweetie! *hugs* Careful though, that DH doesn't catch a cold!

Angel,
Thinking of you sweetie, how are you doing?

Okay, time to get some breakfast... and dive into cooking mode again. Hope I'll be done today. We bought a leather couch yesterday! Reclinable (you can put your feet up). DH had a great bonus this year and the sofa we have right now is reeeeeally old and covered with fabric. There's TONS of pet hair on it, no way to get it off. It's fine now, but I felt really uncomfortable sitting on it with a newborn, with all the dust and hair flying around. So we invested in a good couch and I'm very excited to get it; it will be delivered in 3 weeks. Can't wait!

Take care,

Sophie xxox

[Miracle08]

Hi guys!!

Lee, did I miss something?? Are you not coming back anymore??? I understand if it is to hard for you but I hope in a little while maybe you can come and chat with us again??? I am not intending to put any pressure on you...
I am really sorry about what you are going through. You know, I understand you feeling better now that you know that you are off the roller coaster. I have thought about just excepting a childless life just so I can stop constantly thinking about it. I really am thinking and praying for you. Big hugs sweetie...

Hi Sophie...you know what...my husband suggested sex too...I wonder why??? No, I am not into accupunture..(girls, go easy on me) I think it is weird. Yoga...hmmm...i beleive my dr recommended it but I have never went. The DR thinks it is stress and anxiety that causes my headaches and not being able to sleep. Jennifer is doing great, thank you for asking. She is out of ICU and in her own room!!! Little by little...

Wishfull, was it you who asked about tmt?? Well, it is still in our minds but we arent setting a date so I dont get let down anymore. I want to wait a couple of months and see how we are finanicaly and then we will make more permanent plans. Hopefully this year still might be our year!!! Keep your fingers crossed. How is the side effects? I hope your hot flashes eaze up...!!!

Angel...what the heck...where are you???

Angie...good to see you...dont work to hard. Maybe you will get a big promotion...???

Ok, well I got more then 45 minutes of sleep last night...whoo hoo!!!
I spoke to my drs nurse and they are going to call something in for me. I hate this...I wish I could sleep on my own...

ok ladies...I will check in later....!!!!!!!!

[wishfull27]

hiya ladies - just a quick one as still loads to do and want to watch the Apprentice

Lee - hugs honey - you know where we are ((())) xx

Mir - like your thinking - at least you have a plan for a plan!!

Ang - you need a payrise girlie all this work !!

Sophie - keep them feet up and get resting

Still popping the pills and had accupuncture today so hopefully she will help the flushes to subside!!

I need a pass ladies - am away with work tom night then at my parents for weekdn - will try and nick DH laptop to check in on you all

Have a good one !!

love ya

carolyn xx

[lara312]

Lee so sorry to read your news but you are 1 strong lady and whatever you and dh decide you will be parents but with all the foster care you do you already know that you are great parents nice to see that you are going to have a bit of time for you and dh hope your still going to be about
big hugs lots of love Rachel x x

[Angel505]

Lee, I'm so sorry about your BFN. You sound like you are being strong about it. I know its not easy dealing with it, but you'll get through this. And a meltdown is necessary in the healing process.

I think a holiday is a brilliant idea. Any plans as to where?

Take time out for you and DH. And I hope you soon find a way to bring you loads of happiness and smiles.

[kgbrown]

To everyone reading this first I would like to say God Bless You. It is his will for you to have a baby. Please read my page as I share my story.


http://www.squidoo.com/Surviving-infertility-with-god

[Sara30]

Hi guys

Very quiet on here at the moment?? Thank you all for your kind words, thoughts and I really appreciate being able to call you friends.

Ok I have had 2 days to think well 5 really as I felt it hadn't worked on Monday, I also went to the funeral yesterday of my friends daughter, it was incredibly sad, beautiful, moving and thoughtful, it also put loads of things into perspective for me. Life is for cherishing, living, loving and although I had that life changing thought (well for me it was life changing as I was a workaholic and decided to give up a lot of my work to support my dad) a few years ago when I nearly lost my dad, and he was saved by having a liver transplant (not because of alcohol I do like to add!!) it just reminded me again yesterday how precious our life is and how it should be nurtured and enjoyed.

I have seen youngsters struggle to fight and hold on to their lives in the work I do and how strong they really are, when they should never have had to have the struggle they have had, my life is amazing really, I have a wonderful family, a wonderful husband I have friends who have supported me and stuck by me through everything, you know I looked in my memory box yesterday, I keep things in there that our foster children have given me over the years and there were 23 mothers day cards in that box, 23 cards how lucky am I to have had that many, and every child who gave me a card some obviously have given me more than one, I still see them all. So I have been a mum many times over, just couldn't see it until now. I am really blessed.....

So I am not going to go on about my lost children any more, I will quietly grieve them when I feel the need to I am not stupid I know it will come back to me from time to time, I will nurture my rose bush I planted and we are going to plant a tree in the fertilty forest as a forever reminder of the struggle we all go through to have our children. I did most of my grieving last year when we were told I could not concieve with my own eggs, thse 2 extra chances were a bonus go that sadly did not work out.

DH is keen on adoption so once we have given ourselves enough time to have moved on from our IVF journey we will look into it, I do have children I just haven't met them yet............

So I guess I am still 'awaiting treatment' in the form of waiting to meet my children wherever they are so I am back if thats ok to join you ladies on this amazing journey we travel called life!!!!




Love Lee xxxxx

[Miracle08]

Lee,

I just finished reading your post, and you brought tears to my eyes. You really are an amazing woman. You are so strong!!! So very positive. I think you are an inspiration to couples who are struggling with infertility.

I am shocked at how positive you are being...and how you already looking ahead. I am so proud of you. Your husband has to be in aw of you. I love that you have a memory box for your foster children and I thought it was the sweetest that you have mother's day cards in there from them.

Lee, you are more then welcome here. I would be terribly sad if you left. I am so glad you will still be around. You are amazing...

HUGS SWEETIE...

Love ya.

[PMApsy]

Good morning ladies,

How are you doing? My my, the thread was awfully quiet towards the end of the week! I hope you guys are having a great weekend!

Miracle,
Despite the fact that doctors tend to blame lots of physiological symptoms on stress and most of them wouldn't recognize a real depression when it's staring right at them, I have to agree with him/her here. You've been dealing with a LOT of things these past months, and I'm not surprised at all to hear that your sleep is disturbed by it. Have you considered adressing the sources of stress in your life right now? Meds are a great quick fix, but stress management techniques might actually prevent you from needing meds again in the future. Especially given the fact that it's a recurring issue for you. That being said, I really hope your sleep improve soon. I'm delighted to hear that your friend has moved into her own room, this is amazing progress! I'm keeping my fingers and toes crossed for her!

Carolyn,
Hiya there babe, still popping pills? How are the hot flashes? I hope your acu tmt helped.

Angel,
Great to see you're around, hoping you're having a great weekend dearest!

Lee,
My sweet, your post was truly inspirational. I'm glad to see that you've not left us, although I totally understand that you'll want to take a break from posting from time to time. As always, I admire your attitude and I have absolutely no worries that, through all the disappointment and adjustment and coping you have to do after that last attempt, you'll be just fine. You are an amazing woman, an amazing foster MOM indeed, and I'm thrilled to hear about those 23 cards! There are so many ways to fulfill our dreams, our aspirations, our needs... I am convinced that you will find your path one day or the other; the process has already begun! I press you tight against my heart dear, and keep us posted if you want to! *hugs*

As for me, doing fine. Same old, same old. Did lots of cooking last week, and freezer is starting to get fuller and fuller. I invented a great mexican pie, can't wait to thaw one for dinner in a few weeks. Physically, it's becoming harder and harder, the fatigue is real and surprising at times, but I manage. ***warning, baby-related talk*** I've started to have a couple of false contractions, but mostly my uterus will just contract and stay that way for 30-60 minutes, especially at the end of the day, or if I stand for too long, or if I have to pee. The baby still moves ok, so it's not a problem, but it's uncomfortable. I'm glad my boss agreed to let me go home, because I wouldn't see myself in the train with those unending contractions. Ah, well, I already have the irritable bowel, why not the irritable uterus as well! (that's how they call this, actually! ) As for my friend,well it's a real joke! She saw her doc on Friday, and despite the fact that she's been doing her normal activities all week... her cervix didn't change one bit and the baby has moved up a little, so less pressure on the amniotic membrane. Go figure! So now we have absolutely NO idea when she'll deliver, it will be a total surprise! She's 38 weeks now.

Okay, time for me to look around for a nice rental cottage this summer.. one that will accept two doggies! Take care ladies, and I'll see you around!

Sophie xxox

[wishfull27]

hiya ladies

wow how quiet has it been on here !!

Lee - loved your post - like the others said - youa re so strong and whatever next route life takes you down or throws at you - you will cope and come through it xx where you going on holiday to then - make us all jealous

Mir - hope you managed to get some sleep this weekend - you will have to tell DH BACCAB all night long is now affecting your health!!

Sophie - sounds like your starting to nest and getting all prepraed - can't believe after what your friewnd said that she has not given birth yet - at this rate she'll need another brazillian

Angel - hope your ok and had a good weeeknd - despite the hour les sleep !! got anything exciting planned ??

Ang - where are you - please come out and play

Have had a message from Becky - she is thinking about you all but is not logging on as it is not helping at the moment - she send s you all loads of love and I have her email address which she is more than happy for me to PM to you if anyone wants to contact her

Had lovely weekend at my mums - my dad and brother have gone to France skiing so we just chilled out !! ... and news of the day - on friday my donor started her stimulation drugs so looks like will be getting the best easter egg ever this year!!!

Am working from home mon and tues so will try and pop in

Take care

love

carolyn xxxx

[wishfull27]

where is everyone ???

[Miracle08]

Hi Carolyn! I am here. I have been busy this morning already.

So whats up? You enjoying working from home? Any news on the DE lady???

Sophie...so do you think I am depressed, is that what you were trying to say in your post?? My sister says that to me all them time. I just dont see it.

[wishfull27]

Hi Mir - noticed oyu been busy posting!!!

Yes my donor started stims and has follie scan on saturday - we will then find out when ER/ET will be ! - it is getting close and I am getting kinda scared!

where is evryone else ??

Maybe you are run down and thats why your not sleeping - also cos of all worry about DH job abd the IF too .. you have had a lot on your plate and studying too !!

[Miracle08]

WHOO HOO!!! I hope she has many beautiful follies!!! Carolyn I am so excited for you. I understand why you are scared. I wish I could take that scared feeling and throw it out the door so you can just be excited and KNOW this is it for you!

I dont know where everyone else it................

Yeah, I dont feel I am depressed. I am always laughing and smiling. I dont know. It offends me when my sister says that to me. Just irks me. I know I have a lot going on, I wish my sleep would just be normal. I think it is harder dealing with everything with no sleep. Makes me snippy!! Plus, I am know stressing out thinking about night time. I hate trying to sleep...UGH....

[wishfull27]

oooo spotted you lurking sophie

have you been resting up today ? - any news on your friends imminent delivery ??