NOV/DEC 2009 -- Cycle Group

[katie99]

Hi girls -

The site isnt letting me send PMs! whats going on? I emailed the administrator yesterday who said he's waiting for the webmaster to come & fix it! AARRRGGHHH!!! I want to do the list today, I hope it will let it go through! frustrating!

bibi -have written you 3 times & it wont go through! I'm so happy you have schedule now! We'll be a few weeks apart, but no difference
I'll be cheering you on! Boy, i hope they fix this site soon! - hugs!

happier -I'm sorry, hon - it just stinks. I think its great that you already have a plan b - hugs to you

dodo -I agree, you need to call RE today! You need that progesterone, even more important with a FET!

claud -Hooray for a personal slave! Isnt it weird to watch DH take care of everything? Mine gets run ragged & cant wait to go back to work, so he can relax a bit! he he

cheeky -I didnt realize you got 3 snowbabies! hooray for that!

Me2009 -YUM! deep fried turkey! and you dont even have to cook!

Sarah ruth -your follies sound like they're coming along nicely! more can pop up, but the numbers will keep changing each time - they only count the ones over 10mm - unless you hound them to count all - like I do!

ashley - You'll get your turkey dinner, just after ER then a long nap!

BRMommy2b -Wow thats a lot of people to cook for! Then go to New Orleans? have fun! and drink while you still can!

franny -did you trigger yet? Hope you have a lot of fun trying this weekend! thinking of you!

[katie99]

[hjw]

Hi ladies, I hope it's not too late to join you on this thread? There are some familar names on here from my previous cycle groups. DH and I are doing our 3rd IVF in December. Our 1st (fresh) cycle in April was a BFN (we got 6 eggs, 5 of those fertilised, 3 embryos developed as far as day 3, and of those 3 we transferred one and froze 2 embryos). Our 2nd (FET) cycle in July was a huge disappointment, we got cancelled on the day of transfer because neither of our two frozen embryos survived the thaw. After that, I took a break from these boards and thinking about IVF 24/7 while I tried to get my head together again, and regain some PMA.

So we're trying again and hoping for the best Christmas present ever! I have been down-regulating for the last 3 weeks (in the UK that's done with a nasal spray). My lovely accupuncture lady (who knows exactly how I respond to the down-regulation drug from the previous two cycles) has worked really aggressively on reducing side effects, so I'm only suffering from headaches so far (normally, by this point, I'm having bad headaches, hot flushes every 5 mins, night sweats through the night, mood swings, the lot - poor DH!!).

I'm booked in to start actual treatment next week and I won't get instructions about when to start stims until the beginning of the week, but it's most likely to be Thursday 3rd December. Weirdly, my clinic have stopped doing baseline appointments to check that you are fully suppressed prior to stims (the official story being that so few patients have any problems at baseline and so it's normally a 'wasted' trip for the woman, my theory being that they're trying to save money by cutting out scans for publicly funded patients! ).

So all being well, I should be having ER somewhere in w/c 14th December I would guess, and a day 3 or day 5 transfer after that, depending on what happens. So we're going to be cutting it pretty close to Christmas, unless I stim quickly! Katie99 - does that mean you and I have a similar schedule?

I would have joined this thread before, but DH and I were able to get away last minute on holiday and have just had 10 days away, so I didn't want to join before and then disappear on you all! Better late than never though, huh?

Looking forward to getting to know you all a little better!
Hazel

[amysbabies]

happier : I'm sorry about your BFN ... I'm waiting for my beta call today too and it's most likely going to be a BFN too

But the bright side is .. you have frozen embies for FET... I wish I had some to freeze, but I always end up with exactly 2 at transfer.. It looks like FETs work better sometimes because your body is not as stressed...so keep a PMA

God bless~

[dodo928]

hello ladies, thank you so much for the feedback! I finally got a hold of my RE this morning. He told me to try to put the tab under sink water and use a finger to put into so that it's easier to slide into. I hope I can make it tonight.

[turtle0619]

hi everyone
i just wanted to hop on to wish everyone a happy thanksgiving tomorrow (and a happy thursday for the ones not in the US haha)
i dont have too much to be thankful for this year...DH, my dog piper, and my family who have to deal with me calling and breaking down on them what seems like everyday, but who never hang up on me.
but i am so so so very thankful for all of you wonderful ladies who i tell more details about my life to then almost anyone else in my life. you have all shared the ups and downs of the past 6 or so months with me, and there are no words to say how truly grateful i am for your support.
its been a very hard week for me so far. i took the whole week off thinking it would be good for my ER and ET this week if i stayed home...well now instead i am home alone with too much time to think about my dreams getting further and further away. my family wants me to come to NY to be with them, but DH has to work and i would never leave him alone, and the thought of a house filled with 14 happy people (even if they are family...some dont know what we are doing) is enough to make me cry.
i know i'm being a debbie downer, but i dont know if i have the strength to go on anymore. at the same time i dont want to give up. i'm just so mad at my body for not doing what i so desperately want it to do.
am i the only one who feels guilt from infertility?
i have soooo much guilt inside of me...guilt for not being able to give my DH the family we want...the guilt of not giving our parents grandchildren....guilt when my brother says he wants us to have kids soon so our children can be close in age when they grow up....the guilt of everything being my fault...guilt when another one of our older family members dies, and knowing if i was "normal" my baby wouldve known that great person. its alot to deal with.
anyway...i have to get myself out of this dark place ive crawled into since monday morning, but i just dont know how anymore. this canceled cycle has hit me soooo much harder then last time. i feel the hope i had for ivf to work for me is slipping away.
soooo i took the trigger shot, and even though i know i'm not in the sexiest mindset me and DH are gonna see what happens...atleast it will be some form of stress release right? haha
you are all always in my thoughts and i am praying for all of our dreams to come true everyday!
much much much love my sisters!!

[dodo928]

hi ladies, forgot to say to all Happy Thanksgiving! As always, wish everyone to have BFP soon!

[katie99]

hi girls -

I'm sorry that i kept hitting the submit button! I guess it did go through all those times! I'll see if i can figure out how to delete! OOPSS!!

hazel -OMG!!! I'm so glad to see you!! Do you remember me from the june thread? Dont worry if you dont, i got cancelled pretty quick, but hung around anyway to keep up this never ending cycling - UGH!
I'm sorry that you've been doing the same thing - It WILL work this time for all of us repeat cyclers! (If you say it enough times it'll come true, right?) I'm sorry about the syneral, I cant imagine having to take the equivalint of lupron up my nose! kudos to you & Cheekyone for going through that! At least this time you have less side effects! And we are on the exact same schedule?!! I'm so happy for that! This is the last "try" in the package we bought from our cliniic so i'm a bit terrified that if if doesnt work - then what? But trying to keep up the PMA - and these girls sure help with that! I'm thrilled that we can cycle together again
and since i forgot - WELCOME!

Amysbabies -I'm pulling for you today! I've never been lucky enough to end up with snowbabies either, same here, never had more than 2 at ET. But I'm praying for a bfp for you today!

[katie99]

Franny -Your post has me tears! Dont take this the wrong way, but i'm going to yell at you right now - (because we love you)
THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT!!!!!!! Your DH & piper & your entire family LOVE you! I know how down you're feeling this week, but it isnt your fault at all!!
Your RE really should have changed your protocol & monitored you closer after what happened last time! So PLEASE stop thinking that you're at fault somehow! I had 2 cx cycles also - when he took me off that over suppressing lupron - i had a "normal" cycle. And you will too. Endo isnt a cut & dried situation. We over suppress easily. Alot of women have problems with it. And frankly i'm getting as mad as a hornet at your RE
How could she have suggested a donor to you before changing your protocol to one without lupron??? GGRRRR!!! I dont have any family, my DH works way too much - so whenever you need me, i'm here for you. Just dont let me get near your RE right now And please remember that you're brimming over with hormones from all those meds still - thats not helping either right now! If you want to vent more, or cry, whine, or scream - feel free to PM me - BIG GIANT HUGS TO YOU MY FRIEND!!!

[Skylar]

Franny I am so sorry for you, I know how you feel, it does suck when your body won't do what you want it to do. If you want to go to Paris or get a new car, you can save for it and get what you want. Not when it comes to a baby, it's out of your control. You are allowed to cry, get mad and have doubts about the future. It's normal. I did it for months, but after time passes I realize I can try one more time.
Not saying you need to try one more time, let time pass you by then decide what's the next step. This is my last try, I love my dh so much and know what his hopes and dreams are, but this is my last try.
Cry as much as you can and let it out, it's fine. I hope your dreams will come true. We are all here for you, sweetie.

[Skylar]

Franny I am so sorry for you, I know how you feel, it does suck when your body won't do what you want it to do. If you want to go to Paris or get a new car, you can save for it and get what you want. Not when it comes to a baby, it's out of your control. You are allowed to cry, get mad and have doubts about the future. It's normal. I did it for months, but after time passes I realize I can try one more time.
Not saying you need to try one more time, let time pass you by then decide what's the next step. This is my last try, I love my dh so much and know what his hopes and dreams are, but this is my last try.
Cry as much as you can and let it out, it's fine. I hope your dreams will come true. We are all here for you, sweetie.

[Skylar]

Franny I am so sorry for you, I know how you feel, it does suck when your body won't do what you want it to do. If you want to go to Paris or get a new car, you can save for it and get what you want. Not when it comes to a baby, it's out of your control. You are allowed to cry, get mad and have doubts about the future. It's normal. I did it for months, but after time passes I realize I can try one more time.
Not saying you need to try one more time, let time pass you by then decide what's the next step. This is my last try, I love my dh so much and know what his hopes and dreams are, but this is my last try.
Cry as much as you can and let it out, it's fine. I hope your dreams will come true. We are all here for you, sweetie.

[Skylar]

sorry for double posting, it said my posting, failed to send email so I posted again.

[amysbabies]

hi ladies... i have semi good news...

my re called with my beta results and my beta is a 20.6 so.... i'm pregnant but it's a low #... so i have to go back on fri for b/w and see if my beta rises by atleast 60%.

but then she said my estrogen was a bit low so she wants me to increase my estrace from 1 tab 2x.day to 2 tabs 2x/day.

i know my chances are low, but i'm thanking God for giving me another chance and sending me this miracle that i've been begging for ..

[happier]

Hi amysbabies, congrats on the BFP!!! that's a great start!

Happy Thanksgiving!