Jan/Feb 2010--Cycle Group

[katie99]

OK I'm really starting to calm down now and I'm so blown away by my RE and how huge this gift is! I feel awful that I was starting to doubt him this
past week. I am still in shock. My DH is all excited because he really believes this will work. He also just admitted to me that he was always worried about his genes (his half brother has ALS better known as Lou Gehrig's disease) and said he's kinda always kept that fear to himself.
So if he doesnt mind not having a genetic link - then we're a go! I've never seen a man that was so eager to be a dad. I dont know what we did right lately, but God has a plan for all of us, and I believe He had a hand in this. Now I cant wait to call my RE in the morning. How can I ever thank him enough? Other than him not tearing his hair out when he sits down with my chart anymore?

Claudia -thanks - no there doesnt seem to be any legal issues (thankfully!) the couple gave over rights to let my RE choose a recipient. He says that since my lining is ready that if we decide to go with it, he'll do a FET on Thursday so I'll need to be on PIO by tomorrow to not lose the lining.
Today was a serious roller coaster emotionally! Now my FET will be the day after yours! YAY PIO?

Gi -thanks. No way were you harsh sounding! Besides how many times have we cycled together anyway? I'm so happy to hear that your surgery went well, now let J take care of you. Ugh the sniffer - its only for a bit, right? cheers to moving forward!

Lou- I made you cry? Your reply made me cry too! Jeez ivf is fun isnt it? I love how you are always so clear and concise. You really made me think and you're completely right, even if we wanted to (or could) come up with another 30k for a donor cycle, who says that you'd end up with even 2 blasts? Never mind 4. - Either my RE is a caring empathetic man, or he is so sick of trying to figure out my stubborn ovaries and gave up! tee hee - thanks for reeling me in before it made all the difference - xoxo

Beth -Your reply made me cry too! How strong we all are chokes me up sometimes! If this works, I'll sure I'll feel exactly like your Mom
This will be MY child. And I can see how she would tear someone apart for disagreeing with her. Thank you for sharing that with me - it really helped
12 inches of snow? Uh yes, your DH will have to do the shoveling. And its gross, but it works, warm up prune juice and manage to just choke it down. I know, ewww! But theres something to it being warmed that works

Ronda -thanks. its true! I dont think that I realized when he first offered us these blasts how huge this is! I have a feeling now i'll burst into tears again when we meet with RE - but tears of gratitude this time!
Ronda, you know its too early to be getting upset by those evil sticks!
And FET are sometimes known to be late implanters - PMA PMA PMA PMA!
Just hang in there a little longer!

Es -thanks. It does seem like a gift from God. I still cant get over it
How are Herk & Bertha doing today? Hope they are settling in for the long haul!

Miyaya -OUCH! stitches? hope that you'll feel better tomorrow
Congrats on 21 eggies! Sorry that it hurt so bad - ugh what we go through

Tiger -Welcome! These are the most amazing supportive females - I feel very lucky to have them!

Sam -Whhoo Hooo! wishing you much darkening dust!! Did you leave any sticks in the stores? - i can joke about it because I do the same thing!

Sara -thanks for your weel wishes & PMA yesterday - it meant alot
to me. How are you doing? You'll be starting estrace soon! yippeee!

Hope -Good luck with lupron! Your PMA and your blinkies brighten up the boards!

[katie99]

Latrell -thanks for the input. It never fails to amaze me how strong we all are - we have to be infertility isnt for the weak of heart. How are your stims going? Bet you're an old pro with your injections already!

T3 -thanks! it was such a crazy day, I 'm just now caught up with today's posts. I'm sorry that you had a bfn.There is no way to sugar coat it - it just plain sucks. You will feel better when you get your next plan of action from your RE. Mine is also a firm believer in the benefit of a back to back cycle, he says the micro doses of meds left over in your ovaries sort of give them a boost for the next cycle. Big Hug to you!

[claud662]

Katie-why the need to make the decision by tomorrow? Will the RE be transferring the blasts the next couple days? do you get to use all 4 for your FET's?

[Positivethinking]

Hellooo girls, it has been a while, sorry I have been ready the posts without posting anything back. First of all I am so sorry for you Franny, kim Nikki and T3. I am thinking of you and I know whetever come next will be great. Either a BFP next time or even if you decide to move on to adoption. I guess we have to see the best in was life throw at us...I know it is not always easy by this is what keep me sane...This is my philosophy. For now, cry, drink, scream...take it our of your system so you girls are ready for the next step...
Talking about what life throw at us... Katie99, I am so happy for you. (well I am very sorry for the negative outcome of IVM) but I am also very excited for you. It is a difficult decision to make so quick but this is the gift of a lifetime...you were worried about the money and now someone is donating their eggs to you and your DH. You were sad because your last IVM did not work out as expected and now you have new opportunities...My God, life is amazing sometimes. I am not a super religious person but it is hard to argue that it is sooo meant to be. Keep us posted...In my opinion, you are a parent whith a genetic link or not. You will give an education, manners, a family, behaviors, mentoring to a child. It does not make any difference that this child as the same DNA (only my opinion). Love is the only thing that matters. I would agree in a heartbeat....Also your doctor seems very carying and understanding. He sounds like he wants what is best for you...
Gi: I am glad your surgery went well. Take care of yourself.
Sonya: 22 eggs whaoo congrat's...
Miyaya: 21 eggs is great. You have me worry about the pain though... I will have to have my cervix streched as well. The Re told me it will be not painful at all. Well I guess he was lying. Well I will go with a few valium. I hope you will feel better soon...
Beth84: I live in VA as well as yes so much snow... I am typing this reply with a blanket over my back (I look like an old lady ) I cannot wait for May when it 's finally warm again and the pools open. Almost there...
I am sorry for everyone else I forgot to mention. I think of all of you. I really hope next week will bring more positive wibes with plenty of BFP!!!
Until then enjoy your week end.
I dont know any of you but I really love you all and I really feel I am not alone in this roller coster of infertility. So thank you....

[claud662]

Quick post before dinner-

Katie-I saw you posted the answers to my questions (wrote them before I checked the board!!) I am soooo happy you and DH came to your decision and are embracing this gift. YAH for doing FET the day after me!!! You will have a President's Day gift while I will have a Valentine's Day gift!!!!

miyaya-see...all that worrying for nothing!!!! 21 eggs but boo for stitches. feel better and can't wait to hear your fert report. Find out why they would do a 2-3 day transfer if you have so many eggs?!?!

hope everyone enjoys their Saturday night and this will be my last night to drink before FET so I will drink for all the ladies that are PUPO!!!

xoxo
c

[DandMe]

katie My heart was breaking for you... then I have to admit, I was so happy as I read your last few posts. It's not a for sure thing, but it's an amazing gift and a really wonderful chance for you guys to be parents. In my opinion, (and my DH's, who I was reading your posts to) you will never feel a moment's difference, especially if you are given the gift of carrying the baby(ies) yourself. It's like adoption with a a HUGE bonus. Your RE deserves a big hug.

T3 So very sorry for your bfn. I know you must be really saddened by this. What are your next steps?

Miyaya I am with you on a painful ER!! And I was awake for mine - seems to be not the norm. I was totally moaning and near tears... went and had a great lunch, then passed out sleeping for four hours. I am feeling much better although still very tired today. Yay for 21!

AFM All 22 of my eggs were mature - 15 fertilized - the lab said those were great numbers and now we wait to see what tomorrow brings.

[Lauren1171]

Hi Everyone!

I am fairly new to this board. I have been reading for a while, but recently joined. I think it's great that so many people keep on trying. I have 3 failed IUI's and 1 failed IVF. My IVF egg transfer was January 5th, and I am doing back to back IVF......starting my meds next weekend. We are thinking the retreival will be on the 20th. I thought I had a lot of pain from my retrieval and I said I would not ever do it again. Now I say one more time! From what I read here, a lot of you have had a lot more pain/complications, so it makes me think I was being a baby! Also scares me a little as to what may happen...lol.

Katie: That is great that your doc offered you that gift. I have thought about adoption myself if this does not work.

I am wondering what dose Gonal F everyone takes? I was doing 600 a night last cycle and I only got 12 eggs. Transferred 2 on day 3 and the rest were not freezable. This cycle I am starting off with 450 Gonal F mixed with 150 Menopur. I am not even sure what that is. My fridge is like a pharmacy! I have 7 Gonal F pens, Cetrocide, Menopur, Ovidrel and that dreaded Crinone!! Anyway, it's great to read all of your stories and see how many people are in similar situations.

[samgarkay]

Katie-I have wanted to post all day, but was out on the go and only keeping up by the grace of the iPhone! What a day you have had. I am sorry for the way things have turned out with your IVM, but am so happy to hear about the opportunity that has come your way. I am also happy to hear that you and your DH seem to be embracing this chance. If it were me I would totally embrace this once in a life time gift. Even if it works maybe later down the road you could still do a donor egg cycle, but for now it may give you a child to love and nurture and time to see what else life brings your way. What more can you really ask for? If this works you will have the ability to actually carry this embryo and give it life. Think of how absolutely amazing that really is. Even a few years ago that concept would have been foreign. Amazing....beautiful...awsome. I don't think I can describe just how magnificent I think this opportunity is. Anyways, I will stop gushing and say best of luck. You'll be PUPO on Thursday and genetics be damned that is all that matters!!

[hms]

katie: wow. was a crazy, amazing day you have had. unbelievable. the emotional high and lows of the post alone were so great - i can only imagine what living through it was like. the heartbreak of no eggs - to the cost of donor - to the forced breather of breakfast - to the gift of these embryos! geeze, you are quite something to handle it all. 24 hours is really really fast to make a decision that large, but I agree it sounds like you knew in your heart it was the right thing to do - especially having your DH come on board so wholeheartedly - that's wonderful! and THIS WEEK!? i can't wait to hear how it goes! yes, YOU GET TO BE PREGNANT. i say get ahead of yourself. you get to be a mommy in 2010!!! you get to have a baby by christmas! (okay now am I getting ahead myself???) of course i'm leaving for my trip to India on Friday so I won't be around to hear the outcome although now I have to make a point to FIND A COMPUTER during my trip through the desert! I just feel like this is really it - that your journey was somehow leading up to this moment and it's so special - like Samantha said, I can't really express what this moment really means, but it's YOURS.

this is just the wonderful news the board needed - of course on top of the BPFs of jacqueline, ashley and now samantha (and soon to be Ronda, Es, and Beth!)

Sonya and Miyaya: you girls are quite the producers! that's wonderful to have such a big selection to choose from. you will be be PUPO soon.

Gi: congrats on a smooth surgery!

Lou: just wanted to say I'm so glad you're still around. I like hearing your take on things.

claudia: woo hoo - drink girl drink. your week is coming.

AFM, I don't know what's going on. AF is still not here which of course is fabulous, but how do I explain the BFN yesterday (12pdt), and how do I explain the horrible cramps i had ALL DAY. At one or two points, I'd feel a little (TMI) moisture down there, and turn to DH saying, 'AF is here now.' and we would have a little moment, I'd go to the bathroom, and she WASN'T there. i don't get it. I know the PIO can keep AF at bay even if i'm not preggers, but for me, Flo always beats my beta. It's just confusing me.

Anyway, my family is all going skiing tomorrow and i guess i'll sit in the lodge drinking hot chocolate.

[gi]

Morning ladies,

Katie i am so excited and delighted for you and dh that ye have decided to take those little snowbabies. Your dh sounds wonderful and ye will make great parents ( i have a very good feeling about this). Taking all the donor part aside i was just thinking even if you had 4 immature eggs retrieved you would have had a very stressful time wondering will they mature, fertilize etc and now you have some ready made waiting to be implanted!!! Your only stress now is the 2ww!! and imagine you will have frosties left over!!! You deserve this after everything you have been thro. and you have been a great support to all of us. Its been a long year for you now go get yourself pregnant xxx

Sonya good luck with fert. report today!!

Miyaya 22 eggs Wow!!! great number sorry to hear about those stiches ooch!!! I hope you recover soon.

Beth how are you doing?? Nearly there, i really hope this is it for you xxx

Arabscrool oh those nasty evil tests, i hope you prove them wrong.

kim, franny, niki, t3 again so sorry for your bfn, it sucks i know been there and wore the tea shirt, this ivf business is so tough and unfair.

Samgarkay hope you get a darker line today!!

gi xxx p.s think katie mentioned getting full names before i totally forgot mine is gina but everyone close to me calls me gi anyway.

[beth84]

Hi all - I did POAS this morning. It's negative. I know that's not the final word, my beta is tomorrow. But I also know that it's probably correct. At least I can look forward to feeling normal again for a few months. I still have three blasts frozen from my last fresh cycle - I decided to hold off until April for the FET, so I can train for a race in March. And then I'm pretty sure we're done.

[Arabsrcool]

Katie,

I am so glad you have decided to take the blasts!. I woke up at 4 am last night thinking about you and your chance to become a mommy. Go glad to hear that DH is on board (isn't it ironic that he was worried about his genes anyway?) I believe shared blood is not the makings of a family, its the relationships that make family! Go Katie, FET here you come! Boo for PIO!

Beth,

Sorry to hear about your evil HPT results. Hold out, you know that those damn sticks can be wrong. I will hold out hope for a BFP for you tomorrow. I am glad you have some frosties and are looking ahead. Helps keep us sane in this crazy IVF world. Train for race? what kind of race?

afm, I haven't used the evil HPT this morning, but it is calling my name. I am going to try and hold off until Monday morning ( only have one left otherwise I would be POAS already. I am not going to store to buy more). On a good note, house is clean, at least for a little while!

Ronda

[Arabsrcool]

Beth,

Just a quick note. I went back and looked at chart and schedule. I would say its a great sign that AF is not here and your HPT may not be sensitive enough to detect the hormone yet. Hold tight!

Ronda

[beth84]

Hi Ronda - I never get AF until I go off the progesterone, so I don't take that as any kind of sign. Besides, the only way my HCG is so low that the test can't detect it, then it would still be pretty low tomorrow (meaning yet another chemical for me). So I think I'm just being realistic, not overly pessimistic. About the race - when I'm not IVFing I like to run, and there's a big 10K race at the end of March that I love to do. (And, I really like the training period beforehand because I really make myself keep a schedule.)

Katie - I am so so happy for you - I know this your chance!

[samgarkay]

Beth-Ok, the POAS club is evil. I know that we are all testing way to early according to Katie's charts. You should only possibly be able to POAS the day of beta and get a positive. I have my fingers crossed for you, and my toes too!! LOL

Ronda-Don't do it. Resist the call of the stick. You are strong. You can do it!! Beta day is right around the corner. Wait till then if you can!

AFM-So I am giving advice and yet clearly I am not listening to myself. I really do hate the POAS addiction. I did it yet again this am and there is still a faint line there but it isn't getting any darker. HcG not climbing? Evaporation line? Thats what I keep thinking, but really on 3 of them??? I am now so frustrated with everything that I am off to buy a digital so I can maybe see the words pregnant, but if those words don't show up I'll be devastated. Yet, I know that the digital isn't near as sensitive as the others!!! UGH I hate this process.