Thanks you guys!
I am feeling so much better now. The freak out and panicking has now subsided, sort of!!! But I am trying to be more positive. I had a lot of mad thoughts going through my head over the last 24 hours, but I have come to a few conclusions...
No matter how badly I want this, if it's not meant to be, then no amount of hoping or praying will change that decision, so I might as well just keep my fingers crossed and just hope for the best - it's no point me building my hopes up, or convincing myself that we have failed... only time will tell... and my clock is ticking... !
I know that might seem an odd thing to think, but When I was pregnant before, it truly believe that it wasn't my time and considering what we have had to go through this time round, with all of my ops and trauma of IVF, I believe that my little angel was ment to come and show me how I would be feeling when the time was right, and what I should be working towards...
We have been working for so long, and so hard for this that when I started out with my treatment I convinced myself that it would work, and I guess the fact that it didn't go exactly to plan, and that these two weeks have just been so up and down - have shown me that you can't take anything for granted... so I'm just taking things minute by minute and hoping that I have learned the lessons that my babies have been trying to teach me, so at least they decide to stay !!!
only a few hours to go now. I still have resisted the pregnancy tests.... but I am going to get some tomorrow... i'll see how long they last!!!!
